Hey, tough shit Wolves, this was the best Premier League season EVAR, as voted of course by the Premier League itself, which is a bit like Margaret Atwood handing herself the Booker prize:
The 2011/12 campaign has won the award for Best Season in the Premier League’s 20 Seasons awards.
A late addition to the shortlist of six, the current campaign has pipped its rivals thanks to a mix of wonderfully memorable matches, unbelievable drama and continuing excitement at both ends of the table.
Yup, like a seasick pensioner lots of teams were leaky at both ends, which made for a mad-crazy-exciting ride! Wahey, Aston Villa fans! (Pay no attention to that disgusting pre-1992 thing hanging off the stubby end of history known as the First Division, btw.)
So what criteria went into this last minute bit of self-congratulatory hokum? Apparently giant scorelines figured, which everyone loves, natch. Remember 8-2? 6-1? Crazy horse. As Richard Scudamore put it whilst shining off his charcoal black visa card to buy more beluga caviar, “Teams are going for victories more and there’s lots of attacking football and lots of goals.”
Also going for this season is the fact the relegation battle and the title race have come down to the last day of the season. A bit of dangerous hubris surely in this though:
The Premier League has never been decided by goal difference before.
And has yet to, in earnest. Perhaps the Premier League might have jumped the gun with this award? Nah.