Something’s affecting Arsenal supporters. It’s called optimism and I don’t like the sound of it. Groups of Arsenal fans are coming together and agreeing—admittedly in some warped interpretation of the phrase that involves getting third place in an average league—that this might be their year. Whenever this happens people get hurt. Good things don’t happen, after all, and to remember that is to insulate yourself from the future agony.
At Arsenal, the reasons for inevitable disappointment are more apparent than people realize. The excitement around some new signings, for instance – Cazorla, Giroud and Podolski – is as bizarre as it is painful to watch, like Olympic show-jumping or people singing along to national anthems without irony. Here we have three middling names in world football being talked up as panaceas, despite their obvious individual flaws: Giroud’s lack of experience, Podolski’s lack of talent and Cazorla’s nose. How can they be glossed over? It doesn’t take a European Football Expert to see that a nose like that won’t win you a title.
Get a grip of something sturdy Arsenal fans, and think about what you’re saying here. Whatever improvements these players will bring to the club, they can’t be so great as to merit a wholesale return to belief in the Arsene Wenger Way. The Born-Again Wenger Apologists would do well to look at what Arsenal needed to improve on the most from last season, and realize that of the top eight teams in the Premier League last year, only Newcastle conceded more goals. Three attacking players is either a post-Spain way of fixing that problem or, more likely, nonsense.
At centre-back, Laurent Koscielny has just been rewarded with a six-year deal to stay with the club. One fan said in response, “That’s the kind of loyalty you don’t see from Van Persie” and seemed not to realise that van Persie’s and Koscielny’s decision whether to stay at or leave Arsenal could be linked to the offers available to them, rather than a deep, sensual love of the club. Arsenal, Manchester City, Juventus and Manchester United have been tracking Robin all summer since his refusal to re-sign; Koscielny thought his phone rang once but it was actually just a text telling him that his top-up had gone through from T-Mobile. There are unconfirmed reports that he asked them if they wanted to make a bid.
And enjoy this one: Koscielny is a starter. Backup defenders aren’t actually allowed at all. Kieran Gibbs and Andre Santos are the options at left back, which doesn’t count as having a reserve because neither should really count as a starter. At right back, Bacary Sagna will do nicely, but Carl Jenkinson won’t. And it’s the same deal at centre back: consult the figures—it’s not possible for a squad containing Per Mertesacker and Sébastien Squillaci to win anything, regardless of them playing any games for the team or even sitting on the bench; it just wouldn’t be right, morally.
Where’s all the optimism coming from then? I think it’s just in comparison to last season. This time last year Nasri and Fabregas were about to start spending extended periods in Manchester and Barcelona; today Van Persie has merely decided he looks better in black and white, or blue, or a different kind of red and white, and one player leaving is less than two. One is less than two. That’s math. Or at least maths. Better still, Wenger has also decided to sign some players before the final day of the transfer window this time, the sly old dog, which is another reason to be pleased.
But it’s not a reason to be optimistic.
Being optimistic, in football terms, surely has to do with the hope of some tangible improvement and that’s the bit that’s beyond Arsenal. Chelsea finished behind them a few months ago and have gone and spent £80million already, even if they’ve not done a good job of it, so third place has moved up the money ladder a bit. United, who finished above them, have spent and are spending too, so second doesn’t look on either. The best that can be hoped for is third place again with some nicer football this time, and if that’s cause for optimism then it’s the saddest kind of positive thinking you’re likely to get. Negative positive thinking: is it a new niche?
This isn’t a comprehensive analysis because it doesn’t need to be (and because that would take ages). Arsenal finished third last season and nothing suggests that they’ll improve on that now. It’s not really their fault that everyone else is on the financial dope (although they do have themselves the most expensive season tickets around), but as long as they don’t have the real big bucks and some defenders the fans can only come out feeling let down any time they start a season feeling good. Never be happy, Arsenal fans, it’ll save you the hassle of disappointment. You might get third this season; you probably won’t.
I am far from drinking the Kool-Aid, but this seems unnecessarily harsh and dickish.
DICK HEAD!!!!!!
Your girlfriend must’ve broke your heart…bitter DICK
Probably a Tottenham fan butthurt because your tiny tots aind doing Jack in the transfer window and will end up mid table…Poldi and Cazorla have ove 100 Caps for Spain and Germany between them, with all that talent in those teams, how can you say Podolski lacks of it and what does Santi’s nose have to do with anything football relatad you dumb twat haha sore loser
Agree with u mate probably a fkin spud and all of our signings are internationals for 3 of the top 7 international teams in europe who the fuk has spurs gt
what a tw@ giroud pod n cazorla are class maybe giroud isnt experienced i agree with that but per will have adjusted after some premier league experienxce we do need a better lb n cover for sagna i agree with u about that too but we can win the league if ee hadnt had such a bad start last year we wud if been up there what u shud realise is we only had rvp walcott scoring double figures this year giroud if he gets 10 to 15 n podolski 10 to 15 cazorla say 7 to 10 arteta and rest of midfield etc gervinho walcott ramsay to get atleast 5 each then were a lot stronger than last year plus with a stronger midfield we can contain possesion more so our defence wnt b under as much pressure also if rvp stays then we will have one of the best offences in the league i believe in arsenal so shud every other fan if u SUPPORT a team u do so through the good and the bad times i hope at the end of the year the mighty gunners prove u wrong.
Ah yes the letters-only-no-caps-lock-or-shift keyboard.
Ain’t* and related*
Dick head you just suck sick.you hater.
Your team must be in the europa league next season! CHUMP
Are you kidding me Ethan? I’ve read some decent articles from you in the past on The Footy Blog but this is by far the worst one on here. What are you talking about with your facts and figures? Podolski and Carzola have been regulars on both the German and Spanish national teams for numerous years (over a 100 caps between the two of them), Giroud has talent, yes lack of experience, but that will pay in dividends this season playing with Podolski, Arteta, Wilshire, Walcott and maybe RvP. Remeber he was Ligue 1 top goal scorer last season.
Before you release an article on The Footy Blog, you need to get your research collaborated and a better stance on a story. Carzola’s nose? WTF! Poldolski’s lack of talent? WTF! Have you been living under a rock since 2006?
I’ve supported Arsenal since I was 5 years old (over 30 years) through the good and the bad seasons. I support them because I love this club and what it meant to me and my grandfather. I will always support them til the day I die. Not even a two bit hack of a writer would change my views on my club. In the end of the season, here’s hoping you’re eating crow pie mate!
I’m hoping Richard Whittall, James Sharman and KJ read this article plus the comments and realize that they need to proof read all your posts before they can publish it…what a joke you are!
LOL – like a child in school, he’ll have to get all his homework checked, great post.
Ethan, optimism is something that drives people and is a good thing. You cheer your team no matter what. Go see a TFC game one time and sit in the Rsupporters section to understand what a fan is, not the stupid stand underneath the press box so your hair doesn’t get wet. Those are great fans who support a terrible team through thick and thin. it’s the way it is supposed to be.
Problem is, newbies to football like you seem to be jump on the bandwagon of winning teams or rich teams like Manu, city and chelsky and forget that the league has 20 teams, most of which have never won anything and whose fans still cheer and bleed their team. why? Because they love the game and they love the team. Should stoke fans, everton fans, newcastle fans, villa fans (eh KJ???) abandon their teams and not be optimistic because they stink and haven’t offered recent glory?
Go jump on a bandwagon on Sportsnet with Gerry Dobson, you’re not good enough for the Footy Blog
EDR needs to write an article for every EPL team, so we can see how many terrible, humourless fans each club has and then tally them up and see which one has the most! My money is on Liverpool!
Nah, no more negative ones. I do think I’m right though, and I don’t think it’s even particularly negative. Is there anyone around who thinks Arsenal will finish second or first this season? Because, really, that’s all I’ve said here.
I don’t think you’re wrong, either, and I’m one o’ dem Wenger Apologists. The entire back five need steady backups, at the very least. I guess my delusion would be that Steve Bould is going to beat some defensive sense into these guys.
Third is a realistic ceiling, but fans will be fans.
I even like Arsenal most of all the top teams. Nice football, living within their own means: I like that.
But yeah, I knew this was coming.
Arsenal have done quite well to stay around the top, but haven’t made the critical decisions at the right times in order to win. Their defence doesn’t need backups – it needs to become the backups.
You knew this was coming because you’ve chosen to write an intentionally condescending and provocative piece. These are not the actions of a professional football writer, or a novice, but are instead those of the lesser spotted internet troll. Reading this has wasted 5 minutes I’ll never get back and has taught me nothing, which is the very reason humans evolved the ability to communicate. But hey, I’m sure you’re enjoying the fall out, so good luck to you fella.
What does Santis nose have to do with top 3 finish twat, stupidest article ever, my 12 yr old could be more eloquent and resourceful…sorry but besides the whole Arsenal til I die thing, its just unprofessional…and you know it, be a man and admit it
Good lord! Obviously (or I guess not so obvious) the nose thing was a joke!
Main issue for me is or “average league” comment. Proves to me you haven’t a clue. 3 different English champions league winners in the last 8 years and only 1 of those years has failed to see an English team in the final. I bet every other country wishes their league was as average as the EPL xx
Bullshit.
He’s definitely a spuds…
Looks like you hit the nail on the head by the comments on here! (please note sarcasm). Glad I don’t live in your miserable depressing world!
Seems more like hatred and critici than analysis. Sucks a site posted this
Meant criticism
haha all the butthurt arseanal fans :)
arsenal will be lucky to finish 3rd next season, chelsea and united have strengthened, city will too.
I get that the article is supposed to be funny; but Koscielny has actually been very, very good. Barcelona called his agents like the sniveling cunts they are, but he said no.
What a load of pony this guy speaks, green eyed monster has got to him – he cant contain his hatred, it seeps out of every line he writes. This plonker is obviously worried by his own teams in adequacies and lack of great signings. You expect biased drivel from fans not Journalists who have a certain responsibility with what they publish.
Bar Cantona 90 percent of the EPL’s top players over the last few decades have taken at least half a season to bed in. Look at how out of sorts Jaap Stamm and TH were in the beginning.
Most Arsenal fans would agree that they are still potentially short of a DM, back up GK and CB ,
BUT they now posses the biggest squad in the EPL – Man u have brought an unknown and a great “Prospect”. Hence the rush to sign PSG bound Moura and paying over the odds for RVP.
CFC have brought a talented midfielder but one who is yet to play at the top level week in week out and a South American who is going to take quiet a few months to get used to life – meanwhile no Drogba to bale out an ageing squad that were lucky to Finnish fifth
Regardless of destination RVP has done Arsenal great favour, he has had one great season in 7 and is 29 years old . £20m is good money for a injury prone “gifted uncertainty who has just been replaced by a 100 cap German International, Frances top scorer and the fourth best player in Spain.
Song for 50 percent of the time is out of position and lumbers around like lurch chasing the ball and conceding free kicks. Easily replaced.
Let the football do the talking Arsenal makes it all the sweeter shutting up chumps like this.
“the fourth best player in Spain”
Arsenal have bought Xavi? Kept that quiet. Can he play at left-back?
TH? Tommy Huddlestone settled in straight away!
Hahaha! Another piece of gold! I am interested to see your takes on Man Utd and Liverpool this off season, as well as Tottenham and Newcastle of course. It’s sad seeing how bitter and irrational Arsenal fans have become… wait no it’s not. It’s hilarious. At least on the “Chelsea are spending like morons” piece, their fans were able to offer some sort of counter argument. Your biggest point is “Arsenal have awful defence” and the comments seem to have missed that section…
No you idiot, 49 goals in the EPL cant be ignored, the fact that he mentions someones nose and says someone inexperienced after of 100 German caps is what makes this ridiculous, England doesnt have half the talent Germany does, lets admit it, im Anerican yes, sorry if i offended people, and Poldi has been a regular in that squad.
Cazorla has 40 some caps for spain that has Xabi, Iniesta, Fabregas, Xavi Alonso, Busquets, has had Siena, even Silva…so the writer can go F himself
Who’s xabi and xavi alonso?
bit harsh on koscielny and cazorla’s nose, he is cute like a garden gnome, but still cute
Why does this posh cunt turned predictable, Brooker mimicking troll continue to be given a platform to speak shite?
I’m not posh. I have two surnames – it’s actually for the opposite reason.to being posh.
EDR is my favourite football writer. I hope he never becomes famous, he’s a football writer for the hipster. His writing is so unique, a refreshing contrast from the humourless Zonal Marking and Jonathan Wilson. Don’t go mainstream, bro, and keep it up.
“Chelsea finished behind them a few months ago and have gone and spent £80million already, even if they’ve not done a good job of it, so third place has moved up the money ladder a bit. United, who finished above them, have spent and are spending too, so second doesn’t look on either.”
Interestingly, the writer has argued in this piece on Chelsea (http://blogs.thescore.com/footyblog/2012/07/27/dean-richards-who-will-tell-abramovich-his-summer-transfer-strategy-at-chelsea-is-all-wrong/) that money can’t buy success. Hmm…
Yes, you’ve got me there, with the piece I linked to right after talking about Chelsea here. I thought the clause being bold and in blue might do it, but here it is again for you: “even if they’ve not done a good job of it,” links to http://blogs.thescore.com/footyblog/2012/07/27/dean-richards-who-will-tell-abramovich-his-summer-transfer-strategy-at-chelsea-is-all-wrong/
And to be even more helpful: yes, money can buy success, but not if you do it wrong, which is what I explained last week in one of our little sessions.
Ah. I was blind but now I see.
I’m not going to rant about how ridiculous this was. Just look at last season’s start compared to the potential of this season with our new additions. A definite cause for optimism. If you’re not passionate enough about your club to show optimism before a season you’re not a fan.
Let us have our moment and piss off. lol
Don’t see any blogs chirping Sharman’s Reds or Dunlops Villa squads.
I disagree with EDR of course, but the tone of the piece suggested the article was a joke. Lighten up, Gooners! You’re making all of us look like illiterate Spurs fans.
What I find fascinating is this obsession with Podolski being amazing being suggested by Arsenal fans, he couldn’t cut it at Bayern Munich after the arrival of Luca Toni and was very much the big fish in a tiny pond at Köln.
He’s okay, but no better than Gervinho or Walcott, and to suggest that Kagawa is a “prospect” is laughable. Ask any Dortmund fan what he brings to the team and you’ll see.
I’m not saying that Podolski isn’t good, just not good enough to make arsenal any better than also-rans.
I thought maybe he meant Kagawa as the “unknown” at first but that is even stranger. I suppose the unknown is Powell (who was wanted by every big English club including Arsenal).
Arsenal have made some decent signings but Podolski isn’t the answer to RVP leaving and well Giroud did lead Ligue 1 in scoring, Bafetimbi Gomis also did that once. Giroud does look a few steps above him of course, but with all the new signings this summer, we will have to wait and see.
Sometimes, beautiful flowers can come out of a dirty orchard so what we do is, pluck the flowers and move on from the dirty orchard. The article is right about the assessment of our full backs especially the left wing. In the pre-season games played so far, the goals have come through the mis-adventure of the fullbacks. Besides this, the whole article is just about “sour grapes”. Should the spuds spring a surprise and do well, we shall poison their players the way we did it on the final day of the season a few years back(lol).
He prolly walked in on his mom sucking his best friends dick, hence his really bad day when we worte this article.
oh man, you are so BadAss
Lol EDR is such a troll.
I ONCE WITNESSED ARSENAL WIN A TROPHY….AND THAT WAS WHEN I PUT DOWN THE CONTROLLER.
HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
EDR:
Your first mistake was not mentioning Vermaelen at all when ragging on Arsenal’s defense. You don’t think Vermaelen is good?
Your second and biggest mistake was under-estimating the effect Santi Cazorla will have for Arsenal.
They will be a much better team this season than you give them credit for, mark my words.
haha….you woolwich wanderers twats are fuckin priceless. Can’t see a wind up when it hits you in the face like Man City’s chequebook. If woolwich make top six i’ll be amazed.
you are just a fool with such a crazy analyzes,where did you get your information from regarding these players that they don’t have talent,have u seen podolski over the passed years for his country or his previous clubs,and how could u be so crazy to say GIROU isn’t an experience player,do u know what it takes to be a higher goal scores in a league where you have thousands of players,look you guys should learn to be objective even if you are not a fan for the club,it doesn’t give you the clued to have negative criticizing,n even look at a talented player like cazorla which any club in the world will like to have in their squad,n u are saying he’s a nose how could u be so unjust to urself . when i saw ur comment from the heading i thought u were speaking sense that’s why i decided to go through it but unfortunate for me i saw rubbish,i thought u were saying arsenal fans should not have too much expectation this season cause those guys have to adapt that would have make sense,but rather speaking rubbish.iam so sorry i can’t meet you in person b’cause u were going to feel bad about ur self u crazy fool.
U must be a whiteheart lane baby. What place are you coming in this year??
I thought the piece was trying to counteract or satire all of the optimism with an over the top pessisism.
I do think arsenal will be improved this year but we must remember that they were 20points off the pace last year. So improvement will be another top 4 finish and moving within striking distance of the league. Then after another year of improvement and recruitment, they can challenge for the league.
these comments are one million times better than any article you’ve ever done
Well the guy was spot on with his pick of Real Madrid winning Champions League last year. So there’s that. He’s just a kid so let him be.
http://www.lifesapitch.co.uk/opinions/why-real-madrid-will-win-this-seasons-champions-league/
Why read football articles if all that you want to do is disagree with them? Surely if you want to read positive articles, then you should read your club’s site? But then I suppose you don’t get replies on those, eh.
Hey, you were right!