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This is an homage both to Elliotte Friedman and Dustin Parkes, I guess, particularly as I met them halfway. They say (I think) that the best way to get stuff out of your head is to write it down. So to cleanse at the end of the week, here is a list.

1. Paul Lambert is clearly setting up Aston Villa supporters for a loss against Arsenal by overly praising Arsene Wenger.

2. That newspapers think a former manager’s ‘instincts’ about what Jose Mourinho will do next count as actual news.

3. Sir Alex Ferguson patronizing his latest victim.

4. Barcelona trying to save the world in order to draw attention to itself and arousing the right-wing slugs at Fox News.

5. Anthony Furey not answering my questions.

6. The number times Mario Balotelli cracks a smile as an indication of his future AC Milan form.

7. Beckham has another Beckham cam at PSG.

8. Oscars 2013: Who Will Win?

9. Whatever motivates Paolo Di Canio to do what he does at night.

10. That the Guardian’s Roberto Mancini interview purchased on the back of some free advertizing for Etihad airlines is now being broken up into bits and reported on as news by every other soccer media outlet in the world as I write this sentence.

11. Panels of journalists discussing whether it’s time for Arsene Wenger to go from Arsenal when everyone knows he’s not going anywhere.

12. The slow and assured disintegration of Ryan Nelsen.

13. Eredivisie’s major title match between Feyenoord and PSV is scheduled for 6:00 AM EST this Sunday.

14. That someone from Barcelona—this time the assistant coach Jordi Roura—complained about the pitch at Giuseppe Meazza against Milan.

15. There serving Michelob Ultra at BMO Field this year.

16. The worst Man United side in years could still win the treble.

17. Matthew Norman.

18. Joe Allen looking on the bright side.

19. Sports Illustrated dedicated a podcast to the first public things Landon Donovan said in 2013.

20. Listicles.