Manchester City's Italian player Mario B


Whether it was the crazy ex that thought calling you at 4 am in the morning was a good idea or the ‘friend’ who found setting your hair on fire therapeutic, it’s not strange to miss the antics of zany characters that are no longer in your life.

James Milner is going through the grieving process right now, casting an envious eye at the folks in Milan who are enjoying the company–for now–of one Mario Balotelli.


“I miss him, to tell you the truth. He was crazy, he liked to be the centre of attention. It was like having a 12-year-old in the dressing room at times but he was harmless and I hope he does well in Milan – on the back pages of the paper rather than on the front.”

Milner added it was ‘very hard to hate him’ and that ‘he’d go off but half an hour later he would come back and apologise.’ Forget the antics, City could use his goals. The enigmatic striker has scored five times in five games for his new club, ushering Milan into a Champions League spot in a tumultuous campaign that has been buoyed by Balotelli’s arrival.

Mario did himself no favours in Manchester but a scandal thirsty press helped expedite his departure. In the end, both sides may be better off with distance between them. Just don’t forget to write.