Welp. The bullpen let the Jays down again yesterday, provoking the anticipated piss-fest from the types of fans who can’t grasp how this year’s early struggles have nothing to do with last year’s, and that there are far higher quality pitchers for the Jays to rely on, and that everything is going to be totally fine back there.

Of course, the bullpen was hardly the only culprit in the loss. Manager John Farrell left Darren Oliver out there for a long time as the game was coming undone for the Jays. Smartly brought in to face lefty Nick Markakis, who got an it happens single, Oliver was left in to face right Adam Jones. While he could hardly be called a pitcher with reverse splits, Oliver has been effective against right-handers over the last couple of seasons, just not nearly as much as he has against lefties. Still, he got Adam Jones to strike out, and was allowed to continue against Matt Wieters– a switch hitting catcher who has had more success in his career as a right-hander against lefties than the other way around, especially so in his breakout 2011 season, where he OPS’d 1.124 against left-handers to .662 against righties.

Leaving Oliver in to face Wieters, who drew a walk, was a mistake. But one that still set the Jays up for some measure of success, as the left-handed Oliver forced the switch-hitter Wilson Betemit to bat from the right , where he holds a career .686 OPS. In hindsight, bringing in Casey Janssen to face Wieters may have been the better move, but the way Farrell played it wasn’t terribly egregious.

Of course, none of this would have been a concern if Brandon Morrow had been able to command his fastball, which he was leaving up all night, which resulted in home runs from Adam Jones and Robert Andino, plus a Nolan Reimold double that ended up producing the game’s first run on a Markakis sac fly. If Morrow pitches the way he could and should the bullpen issues are a moot point.


“It just felt like 50,000 people having my back,” says Colby Rasmus in a great feature by Brendan Kennedy of the Toronto Star, speaking about the sequence during last Monday’s Home Opener that saw him make a spectacular diving catch– receiving a standing ovation for it, at least in my section– then knock a triple down the line and eventually score the game’s first run.

Rasmus had perhaps the most impressive of the Jays’ four home runs last night, homering the opposite way and showing off the re-worked swing mechanics that the Jays are hoping will very soon make fans forget about the awful two months he put in at the end of last season.

If they were struggling I’d be the first to point out that it’s way too early to take anything seriously, but did it give me pleasure to watch three of the Jays most maligned hitters of 2011– Rasmus, Kelly Johnson, and Edwin Encarnacion– go deep last night? Yes, it did. Yes it very much did.

TV: Sportsnet

And now the lineups, by way of the live box score at theScore.com. And for those of you who’ll be out and about, be sure to follow all the action on your phone with Score Mobile

Actually… in the lead-up to the game I’m going to be one of those folks who is out and about, so I don’t have the lineups yet in front of me. I’m sure you’ll find them somewhere. On the pitching front, we know that it’s Henderson Alvarez (RHP) for the Jays versus Jason Hammel (Shitballer) for Baltimore’s Baltimore Orioles of Baltimora’s Tarzan Boy.

Comments (276)

  1. First post for me. I’m Kelly Grubers bastard sons brother. He’s been bugging me to join this shitshow.

    Fearless prediction….

    Alvarez will induce 15 groundballs, 2 double plays and Pat Tabler to orgasm.

    In other news, laying in bed today I nicknamed my O’ladys’s tits, from now on they will be known as:
    Tittiana Nipplenko and Shaboobala. Names are culturely sensitive and reflect the ethnic melting pot that is Canada.

    She rejected my first name for the duet “rocks in socks”.

  2. Unfortunate to lose yesterday. Morrow serving up taters all day long didn’t inspire the confidence that we’re all hoping he’ll find as we move forward in the season. The bullpen meltdown was unfortunate but I felt the Jays could have won that thing going away if they had everyone hitting well instead of just a few select guys. Bautista slugging .308 is a stat that jumps out. The Jays won’t survive if they can’t count on consistent production from their all star. Still way too early to be overly concerned – but the Jays offense needs a solid Bautista to really compete.

  3. could someone start a “fire gregg zaun” petition on change.org? he blows. his sample size goes back 5-7 days.

    • zaun is a pole smoker.cant stand the mouthpiece.there has to be someone out there better than this shithead.the way he criticizes players you would think he was an all star.him giving hitting tips when he sucked hitting is hilarious.just phuk off arrogant zaun

  4. Wilner tweeted something about Morrow telling him on the pregame show that he had diabetes issues yesterday.

    • After listening to the interview, something about the insulin not working, and his body not absorbing the sugar. Said problem wasn’t fixed until around the 6th inning, and that is why he didn’t have his best stuff, especially lacking some velocity…

      • As a type 1 diabetic myself, I often wonder if his diabetes ever has an effect on his game. It’s a very tricky disease to keep stable.

        • As a type 1, what would you advise? Should he be testing his blood sugar every hour before the game? i would’ve thought he’d have a pretty strict pre game regimen by now.

  5. God, Buck’s hair is fucking brutal. Look at that mop.

    • That quaff is beyond reproach. I’ve seen less waves at the ocean.

    • Everything about Buck is brutal.

      • Welcome to the jungle Uterus Smasher. Nice handle by the way, I think you and I will finally bring some class and dignity to this site.

        Now on to a very serious topic:

        Don’t fuck around with The Buck’s salad y’all. Yeah it might need a few croutons and school of anchovie, but this cat probably rakes more silverbacks than youve tossed it to Clay Aiken.

        I repeat, pick apart the team, make jabs at Brett Lattimer overzealous celebrations, but don’t fuck with The Bucks mayne. Its a sacred coiff than only the top snatch on the planet has had the honour of running their fingers through.

        That’s all I have to say today from a baseball perspective. Smasher, care to followup?

        • Groooobah.

          That is a fucking keeper. Brett Lattimer. We gotta roll with that from now on.

          • Lets keep her rolling. But the way, looked like Lattimer had a few too many Red Bull cocktails when he tried stealing home yesterday bases loaded, with JBau standing there at bat.

            All I gotta sat is ballsy. Very ballsy. Perhaps a slight insult to Jose?

      • Tabler is tolerable, Buck is a disgrace.They need to fire Tabler’s tailor, whoever is colouring his rug, and Buck’s barber needs to be strung up. Buck is a lipstick job away from trannydom.

  6. which is more funny?

    when bandwagon fans start crying (sky is falling) when they lose to the orioles.


    or nerds’ reactions to bandwagon fans that shit on the jays for losing to the orioles (which the nerds call oriloles) when the nerds start bleeding in their panties (sample size, ‘it happens single’, ‘piss fest’).

    both of you are adorable to me :)

  7. Where was it that I heard Pedroia compared Alvarez to Felix Hernandez today?

    • Twitter maybe?

    • Jamie Campbell on the pregame

    • Jon Heyman of CBSSports tweeted it.

    • Kevin Goldstein on Twitter said today that he wasn’t buying the Alvarez and Felix comp. I can’t say that I blame him. Alvarez has a nice FB, great sinking action, and a terrific change, but King Felix has like 4 quality pitches. Perhaps Alvarez’s ceiling could be comparable to Felix, but I don’t think he’s close. Not yet.

  8. So, who’s been drinking today?

  9. Reading that piece on Rasmus I think the ultimate home for him in Toronto would be on the island. Someone needs to hook that up

  10. Yeah!!!

  11. Kelly Johnson is swell.

  12. Kelly fucking Johnson!


  14. Kelly Johnson for MVP!

  15. The overly tanned 3rd base ump wearing the deep-v and the necklace has a douche factor of 8.7

  16. Where are all the fucking idiot radio callers talking about our hole at 2b now? McCown stand up you piece of shit.

  17. I havent seen that old lady behind the plate at any of the games

    or the fat one

    • She was there last night. her husband died or is no longer able to attend blue jays games.

      • I’d love to know the name of that woman – because I would like to buy her seats for one game – and she could donate the money to charity. We’ve been noticing her for awhile and figure her husband must have died. She must be related to somebody in the Jays executive – faithful fan – always there at start, and stays til the bitter end.

  18. KJ is on fire right now.

  19. Adam Lind – BuzzKiller

    • It was a decent at-bat, 9 pitches. Just couldn’t quite hold off at the end. Should have been a walk.

  20. This ump is being stingy with his strike zone today.

  21. Alvarez has thrown too many pitches, but seems to have settled down.

  22. I’m not the only one seeing Cousins’ strike zone is fucking ridiculous, right?

  23. Jeez. This ump is calling some high strikes, but nothing low or on the corners at all.

  24. Lawrie goes yard this AB

  25. Guys I LOVE Colby, I want to drive down to Rogers and punch McCown.

    • Before the Season Opener, McCowan said he didn’t think Rasmus wasn’t that good in CF. Compared Rasmus to Devon White. Saying Devon has the effortless instinct in chasing down flyballs. McCowan didn’t see that with Rasmus. This week on PTS, Brunt mentioned Rasmus is doing very well defensively, everyone agreed. Bob didn’t revisit what he said about Rasmus.

  26. That crappy Rasmus just got another hit.

  27. Great at bats for Thames, Lawrie, and Rasmus.

  28. Anyone hear anything about Snider? His numbers in Vegas look great, even considering it’s Vegas. OPSing 1.329 in seven games.

    • .400 BABIP.

      That is all.

      • What the fuck is your point? Have you licked enough of your daddy’s ass to have lost all ability to recognize talent? I don’t need a bigger sample size of your posts to realize how cock-numbingly stupid you are.

        • Awww.. did mommy kick you off your video games again? It’s for the better, young one. The world is a much bigger place than what it appears to be out of her basement.

          Also, referring to the .400 BABIP is a sign that it is a small sample size you dipshit. I don’t expect you to figure it out though, seeing as your brain cell count rivals that of one shared between two goldfish.

          Solid effort though.

        • Hey, don’t be a hater, be a congratulator!

          Listen, shoot the shit about baseball, and knock a few titts off while your at it.

          But if you have nothing to say about the team, then go make yourself feel good and watch some German beastiality.

  29. If only Rasmus would hustle and show some heart…

  30. Tit for tat

  31. Almost 50 pitches already for Hamels in 1.1 innings

  32. I am ready to buy TWO KJ jerseys right fucking now, if he delivers on the based loade??? Cmon Kelly Leak!!!

  33. Have some fun, Kelly.


  35. Huge opportunity blown there.

  36. Throw beat him but he looked safe.

  37. Where the fuck is the Man In White when we need him?

  38. ruh rrohhh – Bautista at the plate and you try to steal home WTFFFFFFFFFF???

  39. Yikes. Guess that shows the trust they have in Bautista right now.

  40. All right what the fuck was that

    So much for Farrell getting better at this whole managing thing

    • It looked like Farrell was having a word with Lawrie in the dugout. I don’t think Farrell had anything to do with that.

      • Is Lawrie a loose cannon who doesn’t know when to steal home?

        I hope Farrell admits he ordered the steal. It was reckless.

  41. WTF Brett?

  42. Basesloaded with Jose up and two outs, and you try to fucking steal home?

    Are you fucking serious? What the fuck?!?!?!

  43. Bases loaded, 1 out… Nothing to show for it.

  44. Lawrie made a big time mistake there. Hard to believe that had the manager’s blessing.

  45. In Lawriese – #HuuuugePunchhyyyyyyy

  46. Bad enough the umpire called two very high strikes on Bautista. Wow

  47. Should have had four runs in that inning

  48. Welp, that was pretty dumb.

  49. lol Jose is gonna kick Brett right in his maple boner after the game

  50. Is it possible for me to hate Lawrie? Right now yes, it’ll calm in a bit.

  51. It doesn’t look like either pitcher is going to find his shit, does it?

    • Sure doesn’t. Hopefully Alvarez can stick around until the 6th or 7th.

      Too bad the Jays wasted an opportunity to really shake up Hammel in the 2nd. It would’ve been nice to have a bat-around inning, really work up his pitch count, knock him out of the game as early as possible.

  52. I actually found that throw out at home more hilarious than anything else. What a weird over eager play.

    • lol Yeah it was like Lawrie was thinking “YOU THINK YOU’RE GONNA STRAND ME AT THIRD!?!?!”

  53. If Lawrie just went tried to steal home without Farrell or anyone telling him, he should get his maple fucking ass benched.

    Bring in Omar to finish this game. Fucking idiot.

  54. I still think he got under the tag even though it was absolute stupidity to try it with the reigning HR king up.

  55. If he did it on his own, sit him tomorrow and speak no more of it

    Message sent

  56. Good recovery by Hendu, calm as fuck

    • I was thinking the same thing, he’s been less then perfect this game but has showed incredible poise working out of jams.

  57. Guys, I want to apologize for my behavior. My temper is out of control. Please forgive me.

    My impotent rage generally bespeaks a lack of sexual activity, going on many years now.

  58. I can hear Bautista mumbling “F$%$# pendejo Farrel”, while he is hitting in the 3rd inning with no one on…

  59. You really knocked the shit out of that one Lind.

  60. Why do I have the feeling this offense is just going to die now.

  61. Having Omar Vizquel being disappointed in you should be punishment enough.

  62. It’s good to see Duane Ward not having sweaty armpits for once.

  63. Alvarez not getting many strike calls on the corners..

  64. I see my imp has returned.

  65. Reimhold was taking a crap!

  66. Ugh. I didn’t mind them losing yesterday too much. Was sort of ‘one of those games’ .. pretty evenly played.

    But losing today would really piss me off. The Jays should have scored a bunch in the 2nd.

  67. Darrell Strawberry could have caught that home run.


  68. Man that guys a lazy slug.

  69. Gotta love Razzy and the D. That would be a triple if it were Davis in CF.

  70. Nice catch and great read by Rasmus.

  71. Yeah that Rasmus kid cant play at all

  72. Looks like Alvarez might get one more inning before he’s done 75 pitches still not finished the fifth.

  73. Impressive by Hammel to get through 5 innings after the pitch count he had early on.

    • That 2nd inning was a real waste of an opporunity to KO him early. Hopefully the Jays can turn on Baltimore’s bullpen…

  74. Could he be learning?

  75. It’s a real pleasure watching Rasmus play CF. Highlight reel stuff.

  76. Third time this game Jose has been down 0-2?

  77. O Blue Jays offense, Blue Jays offense, wherefore art thou Blue Jays offense?
    Deny thy pitcher and refuse to swing at bad pitches;

  78. Time to put a dent in this game with the Orioles bullpen.

  79. Thank god EE is blocking Lawrie from running into another out lol

  80. Okay Lawrie, no more stealing.

  81. YEAH COLBY!!

  82. I AM GOING MUD BOGGIN (or whatever the fuck you call it) TOMORROW IN HONOUR OF COLBY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  83. Odds that JP comes through here?

  84. Wouldn’t Big Papi have looked good batting 4th for the Jays?

    • Yes. It would be have been cheaper than Fielder.

      Jays lose a series at home to the Orioles. Bullpen blows up again….

    • I’m sure Ortiz planned to come to Toronto. The stupidity never ends.

  85. There’s been some weird stuff in this game, but so far I really like that

    A) With the exception of JP, the offense seems to be slowly coming around. Rasmus, Lawrie… thought Bautista had some hard hit balls

    B) Even with not having his best stuff, Alvarez looked pretty strong.

  86. I don’t mean to keep ragging on Bautista but is it just me or is he not running out ground balls the same way he used to? Due to frustration perhaps?

  87. Soooo.. Cordero gets the 9th?

    • Fucking troll.

      • Pardon me for a moment while I roll my eyes…

        It was just a simple question; I didn’t mean anything by it. Just curious who our closer was today, as I’m pretty sure Santos isn’t back yet. Don’t get your panties in a bunch.

  88. Is it weird that I started playing with myself when I saw Janssen mount Lind?

  89. Fucking hell. Annoying game.

  90. Well, Casey got squeezed on a bullshit call before that HR, but… this bullpen… it troubles me.

  91. Woot BS #4 you go Jays pen you go!

  92. Already the 4th lead blown the 8th inning or later.

  93. I think I’d rather see Davis saved to be a pinch runner rather than just automatically putting him in for Thames every 7th or 8th inning. It’s not like Davis is incredible with the glove. Plus Thames is swinging pretty well today.

  94. This has been a weird fucking game.

  95. I dislike Wilson Bet-on-me

  96. Atone for that shitshow steal of home, Lawrie.

  97. If Cordero gives up a solo homerun, I will throw my TV away.

  98. Big schtrong meaty thighs

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