Jake Arrieta was on TV… for some reason.

RR’s Quest for Strikes continues tonight, and I’ve got another good feeling here, as… well… screw what the standings say, it’s the Orioles! And, I mean, why the fuck would you be worried about the standings in May anyway?

To wit: here’s what some devilishly handsome blogger I follow tweeted earlier today:

Well, tit fuck me sideways and call me scrambled eggs! Ain’t that somethin’!


Holy shit, Colby Rasmus is hitting fifth, which… I guess that’s what happens when your left-handed hitters all turn into minor leaguers. Some may be a little taken aback by this development, but honestly, even if it hasn’t exactly come about like this, to me it’s like the team is kinda finally rounding into shape. Snider will be here soon, most suspect, Rasmus hitting in a key spot– and earning it, based on a really small sample over the last couple weeks– and what we can all continue, until we actually see him, to pretend is a big bat coming to the rescue in the shape of Vlad Guerrero, possibly by the end of the week! Switch Davis and Cooper for Snider and Vlad, and do you not feel better about this lineup than at pretty much any point in the season? Because I kinda do.

TV: Sportsnet

And now the lineups, by way of the live box score at theScore.com. And for those of you who’ll be out and about, be sure to follow all the action on your phone with Score Mobile

Toronto Blue Jays

K. Johnson 2B
Y. Escobar SS
J. Bautista RF
E. Encarnacion DH
C. Rasmus CF
J. Arencibia C
B. Lawrie 3B
D. Cooper 1B
R. Davis LF

R. Romero LHP

Baltimore Orioles

R. Andino 2B
J. Hardy SS
N. Markakis RF
A. Jones CF
M. Wieters C
M. Reynolds 1B
C. Davis DH
W. Betemit LF
S. Tolleson 3B

J. Arrieta RHP

Comments (235)

  1. Nice start.

  2. All these strikes from Romero are seriously turning me on.

    *knocks wood*

  3. I agree these are strikes for Arrieta, but I also think the Jays players are going to blow a gasket before the end of the night.

  4. Hello friends. Just a question for the experts: It seems to me the best batting order the Jays could field would have Lawrie batting leadoff, followed by Rasmus, Bautista, EE. Thats what I think, what say you?

  5. Titt-fuck these birds, sideways!!!! YEAH!!!

    If you have or havent seen this one before, it never gets tiring and is a classic…………listen closely at around 0:54. Titt-fucking at its finest.


    • Jeez I’m getting old.

      First it’s women prison guards.Then Stoeten wants to be tit fucked sideways while whispering in his ear “you’re scrambled eggs”" you’re the best scrambled eggs ever”.

      Whatever happened to just plain old sex with the lights off?

      That was just an expression and not literal?.


  6. Hmmmm, well…shit.

  7. It’s not that the O’s are that good. It’s just that everyone else stinks like yesterday’s fish

  8. avoid pitching to jones

  9. Come on mannnnnnn

  10. These umpires are completely fucked up.

  11. alan ashby just called it mike’s hard liquor, prompting giggles from jerry. and now a new running gag in the booth. I love the radio team. fuck buck and tabby.

  12. Johnny? Johnny!! JOHNNY!!!

  13. Snider is like Lawrie- the team is just better with them on the team even if they are having a bad day. The team just wins when Snider is in the lineup.

  14. I would like to remind my friends on djf that I:

    am watching the game from a sky box with lots of free booze,
    on Sunday’s game threat I predicted a Jays sweep of the o’s, and
    I didn’t suck any dick to get these seats

  15. David “Singles” Cooper

  16. That’s right, Karen- it was dickS- ours.

  17. SSS and all, but cooper is getting it done thus far. still no power which is hardly ideal for 1b, but ill take the singles.

  18. That’s four straight ropes off Arrieta.

    Now Davis will strike out.

  19. luck

  20. Sweet!

  21. Here come the LOLs!

  22. I’m just teasin’ , Karen ;)

  23. Rajai bunt time?

  24. There’s the one true benefit on attempting a bunt with speed.

  25. Looked like Davis had that throw beat even without the error.

  26. Let’s hope this series turns around the Jays’ season and back into the hunt.

  27. Not to be all Al Davis in here, but there’s something so appealing about players with speed.

  28. Jose back in the dumps again?

    Kind of a wasted opportunity there with runners at 2nd and 3rd with no out’s and only getting one run in.

  29. It’s the aesthetics of baseball- close play at first, possible steals, doubles, triples and big range on defense. Three true outcomes players- walks are anti-climatic, Ks suck against your team, home runs aren’t that plentiful, no steals, stand up doubles, and statue defense.

    Numbers are numbers but the fast players are certainly more exciting to enjoy.

  30. Colby is on fire!

  31. Did JP just walk? :o

  32. XBH by Lawrie

  33. Oh mannn that’s amazing…

  34. Shouldn’t have extended Jones….

  35. The Jays would be averaging about 1.2 runs a game if not for opposition defensive fuckups.

    • this is so true.

      and it seems every other game the jays get one or two guys on base in the first inning for jose and he can’t come through with a hit.

  36. Love Jones blowing a bubble as he dropped that.

  37. Oh, the OrioLOLes are back.

  38. Yee haw! Man, did the Jays (and us) need this after the weekend.

  39. Operation Bacon Grease the Ball seems to be working nicely.

  40. Holy chit a double from Lawrie and a walk from JP. The Mayans were right the world is coming to an end.

  41. did thames join the O’s? is this the start of the downfall for the O’s? is AA now calling the phillies for a trade since halladay is out 2 mths? is zaun going to show teeth?major questions of the day

  42. How has no one mentioned the dark haired woman behind the plate?!?
    What a smoke show!!

  43. Not gonna lie. I love this strike zone.

  44. i love ricky’s glove.black and blue like my balls

  45. What’s the matter, rookie Fuck-Wad? Can’t you take a little joke?

  46. I love how into throwing the ball back to the pitcher this ump is.

  47. I’m hoping to see laffey tonight

  48. Jays fans in right field really want the return of Brad Arnsberg

  49. Into the pen early on 2 consecutive nights? Ups the chances of a Kevin Gregg sighting.

  50. Alvarez has been underrated this year. He’s pitched the most innings ten times through the rotation. It’s especially important when you have your original 4 and 5 starters and closer MIA.

    • Is anyone else still getting rage blackouts when they think of Alvarez’s ejection Saturday?

      • I wouldn’t say rage blackouts but that ejection was indeed complete horseshit.

      • No, because he was one batter from being yanked anyway.

        i do have rage though, and it was because Mr. Groundball got the first two outs of the inning and then gave up three dingers to the 7, 8, and 9 hitters as our two run lead became a one run deficit

  51. I dont see Cooper as being an everday player on this or anyother team. His upside is an empty 300 average with some doubles power, no speed, no glove. BUT, I do think he could be a decent lefty bat off the bench who can play against the occassional righty.

    he is cheap and is not someone who is going to be disgruntled in a bench role.

    sure it would be better if we could get a lefty bat with speed and good defense in a SUPERBENCH player all rolled into one, but those guys dont really exist..they end up being starters and costing money.

    so in review, Cooper is a useful guy to have on the team, just dont know if we can afford burning a roster spot on the dude if we are going to carry all these relievers and someone like ben francisco

    • HE hit a Homer off of the Douche-socks last year for his 1st Homer and in the clutch…that’s deserves a roster spot and a starting lineup spot.

    • LOL was just having this discussion watching here and we agreed … if a super-sub had all the skills you want he’d be a starting regular.

  52. Cooper does this thing where he breaks his bat and gets a hit. It’s a thing he does.

  53. The Cooper-tone bat is baking tonight!!!

  54. Cooper keeps being unspectacularly productive.

  55. The Cooper-tone bat is baking tonight!!! Cooper coming in for Lind is like watching “Batman Begins” after seeing that shit-show called “Batman and Robin”

  56. Amazing what Davis can do when he does’t try to launch a dinger on every pitch

  57. That sound you heard was the Orioles crashing back to earth.

  58. Weiters got canned…. Hey Weiters it would help if you called a better game for your pitchers because that is why you are down 7 runs. Also CoCo wouldn’t be pitching again so we won’t give you too many chances to come back.

  59. So he waited for awhile. Here’s where Romero always comes out and throws like 8 straight balls.

  60. for the first time ever lets give the rogers center staff genuine applause for allowing that class to spell out the ‘heart 38′ message instead of kicking them out of an empty section like they’d normally do

  61. *sigh*

  62. Ricky Romero gutting it out and having a jack morris like performance as he consciously pitches to the score..giving up runs but making sure he gives up at least one less than his team scores.

    Or so the old cogers who broadcast baseball would have you believe

  63. Romero is such a fucking crybaby, makes me sick.

  64. Oh, in case you didnt think texas was good enough, they just signed Roy Oswalt

  65. Wilson Betemit is pretty funny out there.

  66. It’s nice to see someone else’s LFer suck.

  67. Betemit has a “don’t give a fuck” style in regards to his defense.. I like it

    • ya it looks like they made him do it.you know make millions and play left field and cant catch a flu.some athletes make me sick

  68. Pity Ricky couldn’t got 7 but not a horrible performance overall. At least he cut walks way down it’s a start.

  69. I’m starting to come around on David Cooper… it’s not just his numbers so far, which have been a bit lucky. It’s his approach that strikes me as being at least somewhat useful, particularly down in the order.

    Sure, he’s a slugging sink-hole in a power position on the field, we can all see that. But, depending on the composition of a given team, I’m not sure that’s necessary all the time. In this case, I think he kinda fits well – he battles, can reach balls a lot of hitters can’t, and knows how to stay within himself. On a team that runs hot and cold, a slightly-more-reliable than average hitter in the bottom part of the lineup could be very useful.

    Just my 2c I guess… I’d rather see Cooper get a good chance at 1B than see E5 there – that guy should just never, ever touch a glove. baaaad juju.

    • I pretty much agree with your comments on Cooper, but am surprised with your take on EE’s glove at 1st. It was his errant throws from 3rd that earned him the nickname E5, not his glove.

  70. Pity Ricky couldn’t got 7 but not a horrible performance overall. At least he cut walks way down it’s a start.

    Damn Frasor going all Coco us on.

  71. If the Orioles could even sort of play defense they’d be leading this game. As it is, hard to imagine we have any better than a 50/50 shot of pulling it out given how the bullpen has been performing.

  72. Audio’s really good on the broadcast tonight, when Lawrie screamed “FUCK!” after popping up it was like he was right here in my living room.

  73. Yes, Farrell, putting Coco in here will definitely improve our chances.

  74. Please not Coco….

  75. Wait, we’re going TO Cordero with runners on?


  76. If Coco blows this, the panic button should not only be pressed but fucking smashed.
    OK mabey not the panic button but the pissed off button.

  77. So much for this game.

    Implosion in 3…2…1…

  78. Hehe. Strap in.

  79. Hey Pat Tabler, Can i pleeeeeease stop hearing about how Team x, just doesn’t go quietly and how “they really grind out at bats”

  80. I have all the faith in the world that Cordero can get this done!

  81. You gotta be kidding me??? bring in coco????

  82. I think Oliver’s reaction to being pulled reflected the thoughts of everyone tuned into the game. WTHTF??

  83. Did the Orioles bribe Jesus 2 minutes ago? Jesus delivered Coco to them.

  84. This game is way more nerve wracking than it should be.

  85. Coco the Contrarian.

  86. Well, now he gets the 8th inning basically forever. Awesome.

  87. When the opposing batters see a fat-fuck, panda-face, tubby on the mound, they tend to gain confidence and see the pitches better.

    • Yeah, that’s exactly what happened.

    • Every other post from you is “fat-fuck” this or “fat-ass” that. If you’re not 110 lbs, you’re 510 lbs, my guess. But you might want to, I don’t know, talk to somebody about it, you’re not far from being a nut-job from the sounds of things.

  88. Janssen?

  89. yesterday Tabler was talking about Vizquel and all he could say about his career and performance was “he never panics”

    what the fuck does this even mean? Is there this huge contingent of major leaguers that sit over in the dug out with heart rates in the 150′s…in a cold sweat….just fearing their next plate appearance?

    is it the RARE player that can even clutch a bat without losing traction on it due to sweaty palms?

  90. Maybe just his way for saying he’s good in the clutch I guess defensively or offensively. We’ve seen plenty of players boot things around in the field or swing at really bad shit when they’re under stress. Maybe it doesn’t happen as much as he’s making it out to be. That said it’s just another broadcaster cliche. I suppose there’s only so many things you can say night after night.

  91. lol Gose leadoff triple getting him to .297. Even though the average is largely meaningless in the PCL would be nice to see Gose get to .300 all the same.

  92. Here we go

    No lead is safe with this pen. We could literally be up 20-0 with two outs in the ninth and the other team would at least make it interesting.

  93. Wow maybe Jays needed a 6 run lead to feel safe with this pen.

  94. umm. yeah…casey has retired on batter this inning and it was an absolute missile by Markakis right at Jose

  95. Wow… that’s just all I can say… Wow… Wow wowowow wowowowowo Wow Wow.

  96. Getting the last outs is like pulling teeth here.

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