Reposted from January 9th, 2012. (And probably will be re-posted again every year from here out.)

Nobody wants to read my thoughts on the Hall of Fame. Nobody wants to read that far too many voters are morons, dinosaurs, hockey bloggers, or self-important twats crying out for help by wielding whatever little power the sporting world has left them to shrivel and die with (though many are very much not!). Nobody wants to be told that what we actually know about steroids, and especially their impact on statistics, especially given how widespread their use in baseball was, is nothing close to what assfaces think we can just safely assume. Nobody wants to think about why we’ve placed those, and not other training methods, on the wrong side of our collective line of morality. Nobody wants to hear what a fucking disgrace it is that writers who essentially cheered on the steroid era– who looked down on Steve Wilstein like he was strangling the golden goose– act now like the world’s moral compass, when they know goddamn well that PEDs were used under a far more complicated system of tacit acceptance than implied in the intellectually dishonest horseshit they shovel to a readership they clearly do not respect. Nobody wants to accept that we just can’t possibly ever know who did what, how much was being done, how much it impacted individuals, or how level the playing field was, given that such a large number of both hitters and pitchers certainly used. Nobody wants to admit that this was simply part of the game, understood by fans, by owners, by players, and by reporters, and not raged against until a token attempt to make the game “clean” could put the issue in a neat little box laughably marked “Even Though They’ve Been Around Far Longer, People Only Took Steroids in Baseball From 1994 to 2003, and They Were All Filthy, Cheating Swine and Now Everything Is OK (And Don’t You Even Think About Mentioning Greenies).”

Nobody wants me to point out that, for fucking goddamn sakes, a fuck-tonne of the people voting can’t even process the far simpler concept that, while guys like Jim Rice and Jack Morris were indeed some of the most famed and feared players of their eras, they were famed and feared to a level made excessive by gross misinterpretations of their abilities and their stats– and that we needn’t compound those initial errors by digging in our heels like a bunch of I’m-not-man-enough-to-ever-let-my-ego-down-and-admit-fault chickenshits.

Nobody wants me to point out that the Hall of Fame ballot you fill out isn’t your chance to save face, and pursue grudges, and act like you’re some kind of fucking scientist, and redefine the notion of “evidence,” and pretend that ignored internal memos are written in stone, and rail against anything illegal whenever that’s a convenient position, and scoff at seamheads’ proof no one pitches to the score, and act that the Hall of Fame should be a clean, whitewashed place, and pretend you’re not on your fat fucking ass every Sunday watching the NFL and not giving a shit what they put in their bodies, and to screech from the bully pulpit and revise the perhaps-ugly bit of history you fully fucking participated in without ever pushing back. Dickholes.

Congratulations to Barry Larkin.

Comments (35)

  1. Hall of fake according to me

    • you want to jump on the voters or the methods by all means but I figure the Baseball Hall of Fame is a damn sight more genuine than the likes of the Hockey Hall of Fame where everyone and their mother is a member.

    • Amen Stoets.

      How the fuck Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens isn’t inner circle as fuck is beyond me.

      And I’m gonna be happy as shit the day Raines and Walker get in. (I hope)

  2. I’m sure I put this a year ago. Well said.

    This year the Hall of Fame will welcome an umpire in Hank O’Day (no complaints), a pioneering owner who helped stop blacks from playing in Jacob Ruppert, and a 19th Century barehanded catcher who had a great career for his time while also maintaining a steadfast belief that the Earth was flat, in Deacon White. Nice.

    At least we have Tom Cheek this year.

  3. being lazy, grouchy, and 100% correct all at the same time

    my dude.

  4. Well put Stoeten. What a mess.

    Suck it Farrell!

  5. the easy thing to do is to call the voters a bunch of sanctimonious old ****s who have business voting and leave it at that, but that’s largely inaccurate. what do these *******s know about morality? i’m sure they themselves don’t even believe it’s their right to throw stones from their glass house.

    this is about notoriety and nothing more. this is about shtick, not making a statement. print media’s dead. the smart jumped ship when the getting was good, the rest (see: most of these writers) believed the internet was a fad that would go away and their clubhouse of newspaper sports columnists would be the first, last and only source for sports opinions until they retired or died


    now it’s all a race to be THAT GUY. to overcompensate for their mistake by thrusting themselves back into the public eye with the only thing they have left to use as leverage: their vote for the hall of fame. most of these people nobody knows who the **** they are and if they voted for bonds and clemens, nobody would bat an eye. but if they left their ballot blank or voted for rod beck and nobody else, suddenly there’s a rush to view his piece of **** column to see wtf this delusional **** could possibly use as rationalization for such stupidity

    and the fact is, this stupid ass trolling, it’s worked. they’ve won. people give a **** about them now. people think they sent a message to the roiders. get the **** out. this is as legitimate as being “that guy” who didn’t vote ripken or gwynn for the hall of fame or thought jim johnson was the 2nd most valuable player in the AL

    such an absolute joke. american idol voting is more legitimate than this

    I didn’t bother fixing the spelling mistakes

    • Meh. I think you’re ranting about 1 or 2 of them, or very few anyways. Sure there are a few weirdos (Jim Johnson, Rod Beck?) , that is easily said, but seriously there are like 500 voters? To say “it’s all a race to be THAT GUY” is really painting with a wide brush. Probably the vast majority of them take it seriously and are not in it to make themselves a name.
      These few are the statistical anomalies, they just stick out because of that fact, and grab your attention.
      So don’t worry about it, don’t let those few attention-seekers bother you too much.

  6. +1000 for mentioning and linking to Steve Wilstein. Every other reporter is “tainted” and can never enter the HOF.

    • I wonder what Wilstein is thinking today. Does he have a vote? I’d be very interested to know.

    • There are some writers who get it, and those writers should be applauded. The system needs to change though. It’s no longer about Bonds and Clemens and their merits with PED use, because it’s now punishing everyone on the ballot, clean or not.

      How to change it? Well, that’s the question. The other 3 Halls of Fame have a selection committee, each of varying sizes. They have writers, broadcasters, executives, and Hall of Famers on the committees. I know the NFL and Basketball Halls have semi-final groups and narrow it down that way. Maybe that’s the direction you go.

      • I agree that changes of some sort would be welcome. Nonetheless, I think we need to accept that the HOF is permanently damaged by this. If you make changes, regardless of how well advised they are, there will forevermore be the “voted in the old way” group and the “voted in the new way group”.

  7. I actually like Dave Cameron’s (first time I’ve ever said that I like something of Cameron) idea that the Hall be changed to have separate categories. A longevity room, an elite room, the great achievement room. The better the room the bigger the plaque. Got to say that the biggest travesty of the this vote was Lofton being off the ballot already. Top 10 CF all time. An overhauled starting from scratch hall I can see him not being in. Compare him to the guys in already, awful awful decision.

    • +10,000 on Lofton. Making Raines wait is bad enough, but he’ll get in eventually. But to eliminate Lofton from the ballot (and hence future conversations) is a fucking crime.

  8. Yep, no reason to pay attention to this ridiculous, hypocritical, holier-than-thou process any longer. This embarrassing vote sealed it.

  9. Remember the end of Thank You For Smoking and William Macy’s desire to remove cigarettes from classic films to “improve history”?

    The only way to justify today’s BS is to kick out a bunch of people already in the Hall of Fame.

    I’m against this, of course, as I think this character/PED stuff is garbage and, most of all, that it’s a completely inconsistent stance.

    But it feels like kicking people out is the next step that must be taken to “improve history.”

  10. Since he’s a former Blue Jay, I’d love to see Jack Morris enshrined in the Hall of Fame. The 1984 Tigers are one of just 3 teams to win the World Series since 1940 and not have a single Hall of Famer on their club (the 1981 and 1988 Dodgers are the other two). The guy really getting the screwing is Alan Trammell. His numbers compare favorably with Barry Larkin, and yet he is denied. I heard one of the talking heads on MLB network today say that Larkin started more All Star games and won 9 silver slugger awards in comparison to Trammell, but the truth is, Larkin had no competition at the SS position in the NL during the Years he played, where Trammell was overshadowed by Cal Ripken who won all those silver sluggers and was named to start all the All Star games. The sportswriters who vote on the Hall are a power hungry bunch who are in love with theri own opinion.

    • If Morris gets in then it opens the door for Stieb to be re-examined. Side-by-side, Stieb had a better career than Morris, although it was shorter due to injury. Had his back held up maybe it’s Stieb who’s the veteran pitcher on the 1992 Jays instead of Morris.

      • I’lltake Morris over Stieb anyday. Morris was a winner and that is the only stat that mattered to him, and it showed in his world series teams.

        • Then you’ve sealed your claim to being fully retarded. Dave Steib was better then any slop Jack Morris brought to the hill.

        • I know right? It had absolutely nothing to do on his strong offensive teams, even though his overall postseason performance was rather underwhelming.

  11. Slow clap Stoeten. Well said.

  12. Muchie Peachie Such Plus!

  13. I like the belated congrats to Barry Larkin.

    I’ll watch next year when (hopefully) Maddux/Glavine/Thomas get in, but my respect for the HOF, specifically the BBWAA, is dwindling. Fast.

  14. But….but….tell us how you really feel Andrew.

  15. Who voted for my son – I didn’t?

  16. Suck it, Hall of Fame (and Farrell)

  17. I think the biggest travesty of this year’s election is that while Tom Cheek is FINALLY getting his due and being elected to the Hall, he’ll have to do so under the looming spectre of this bullshit.

    Tom Cheek deserves to go into the Hall with a class of superstars and players who were contemporaries of his in that he called games during their time, not three men who have been dead since 1939 or earlier. Tom Cheek was the voice of a generation – the superstars of a generation should have been elected alongside him. It’s almost misanthropic, but at this point, I’d have rather waited one more year for Tom to get elected, because we know they BBWAA can’t fuck up the 2014 class with Thomas, Glavine, et al debuting.

    The other thing that gets lost in the shuffle is that Bonds and Clemens don’t need a plaque in the plaque room to have their accomplishments remembered. Each of them have numerous objects d’art in the Hall of Records and the actual Museum in the HOF. In my visit to the HOF, I found the plaque room to be by far the least interesting element of the experience.

    • Don’t you think the spectre would be a lot more of an issue if one or more of the steroid guys were going in along with him?

      • IMHO, no. Tim Raines, Jeff Bagwell, Craig Biggio, Curt Schilling, Mike Piazza; any or all of those 5 should have been elected.

        Bonds/Clemens, I get it, there are a significant number of people who feel they have no place in the HOF. But the above five do not have the stigma attached to them. And the above 5, by any reasonable measure, are Hall of Fame players.

        However, I do concede that perhaps by going in this year, Tom Cheek will not be overshadowed by the great players, and perhaps will be able to stand apart and get the lion’s share of lionization.

  18. You only congratulate Larkin? Why you dissing Ron Santo, son?

  19. Why would you right a post implying–in true hipster fashion–you’re so over the HoF when every sentence you wrote pants and screams about how much you care so very fucking much that the world doesn’t beat to your stale drum?

  20. HOF just a museum . Meh!
    Just watched R.A. Dickey’s Espn life story. All the bullshit the guy had to deal with till reachin this point in his career and this point in his life is troubling . However, seein how he has overcome the shit and seein the man and pitcher he is now makes him a HOFer in life! Dickey the best!

  21. Listening to the morning show on 590 Toronto, the announcer is going on how players lied to him about steroid use, made himself and all journalists victims. What a crock of shit!! The fucking journalists didn’t have to do any ‘investigating’ the fucking drugs were seen in the lockers of players during post game interviews. Mark McGuire was a guy who openly displayed his use in the early days. The guys on the Fan were pathetic. Get your finger out boy!

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