Baltimore Orioles v New York Yankees

Surely by now you’ve heard about the “report”– or whatever you want to call it– that surfaced yesterday at a site called Dog And Pony Show, where writer Joe Bisceglie has given us his word– and not a whole hell of a lot else– that A-Rod, Robinson Cano, Ryan Braun, and Curtis Granderson will all be suspended for failed PED tests this season.

It’s a motherfucker of a bold claim, and would be a hell of a thing, if true– a Yankee-derailing possibility certain Jays fans must be salivating over– but… is there really value in making the effort to envision a world in which this is something that’s really about to go down? Absolutely not.

I mean, I don’t want to pretend I’m so offended by the quasi-journalism of it that I couldn’t possibly even hold my nose long enough to acknowledge the fact that this stuff is out there– there’s a lot that’s interesting going on in this story, regardless– but there’s just isn’t nearly enough information, or corroboration from additional sources, of what he’s telling us, to start doing something crazy like actually believing it.

That doesn’t necessarily mean it’s not true, of course. And Bisceglie writes in a follow-up post that he received the information from the same source that fed him what he feels was good information– and not just an educated guess that panned out– about Melky Cabrera’s suspension– a story he shows that he tweeted about long before the traditional media got wind of it. In fact, given the timing it’s entirely he was the source of the tweet Andrew Baggarly of CSN Bay Area was referring to when he broached the PED issue with Melky last season, before anybody else had heard of the possibilty– an act that Baggarly was later forced to apologize for, though we now know quite clearly that he was on to something.

His having seemed to have hit on the Melky info before everyone else, though, isn’t exactly a compelling reason for us to believe history is about to repeat itself. What’s helping to give the story legs, however, is the fact that Bisceglie is hardly the fake account, “are you calling me a fucking liar?!?!?” kind of troll we associate with outlandish Twitter rumours based on information supposedly leaked to one super-special little snowflake of an internet user. He’s owning– genuinely, I think, and not particularly comfortably– the absurdity that he’s the one who may be breaking a massive story here.

I have no credibility. I can’t even name my source for you. One of the worst things about the internet is that any idiot can write any nonsense and post it as “news”.  I wouldn’t have even read my own story unless it got picked up by ESPN or Yahoo or some other reputable sports website. I’m not a journalist. I’m not fuckin’ Peter Gammons, or Buster Olney.  I’m a guy who took one journalism class 100 years ago in college. When I write about sports here on DAPS I’m exclusively writing editorial pieces meant to amuse other people like me and hopefully provide them with a take on stuff they haven’t heard before. The most popular feature I write includes a picture of an attractive woman at the end so that people will actually read it.

But that doesn’t mean I’m not right. We have no business running this story, we aren’t Yahoo or ESPN or even Deadspin. We are just a bunch of dudes from Staten Island who stumbled into a chance to tell people about the biggest story in baseball before anyone else. We are much more qualified to post cat videosKate Upton pictures or shit about Jurassic Park. But fuck it, we work really hard on this site and if this is how people are going to discover our little ol’ site then so be it.

He certainly won’t have any credibility if this goes nowhere. And I’m not sure the here-and-now pageviews are worth the absolute cratering his site can probably expect if nothing comes of it. So… those are almost halfway decent reasons to think he might be telling the truth– or, at least, what he thinks is the truth. But so what?

The real story– if there is one– will come out, and surely we’ll have time to discuss it ad nauseam. It would be fascinating if Besciglie had a king hell of a Deep Throat of a source on his hands here– especially because, why him?– and I think his tweets are worthy of some attention for that alone, but please, let’s hold off even bothering to contemplate a world in which what he’s saying is true. Unless something more substantiative comes along, there’s simply no reason to believe it. We sure as shit wouldn’t if it was about anyone on our team, right?

Comments (67)

  1. I wonder if he researched Kevin Gray and 1BlueJaysWay to find out what happens when you pull “sourced” information directly out of your rectum.

  2. Keith Law did say he heard one more big name still to come from Biogenesis. I doubt he was referring to Peralta at the time. Could that be Cano or Granderson? It’s probably all BS, but maybe…

  3. I’m pretty sure Cano’s cousin’s wife told him.

  4. Yankees are officialy done if cano is suspended

  5. If Cano is juicing I’m sure Edwin is juiced up too.

    • Que?

    • This was the first and only thing that concerns me about this story. If true about Cano, it’s not the microscope EE will surely be under that worries me, but the very real possibility that he is using.

    • Turns out the title of the post is very accurate

    • edwin always had power

      • Any problems I’ve ever had with Edwin was with the wasted potential of his power, certainly not his lack of it.

      • unfortunately, the flip-side might be true. he was always juicing…

        • the flipity flopity side may also be true. Juicing doesn’t do shit.

          • This notion that “juicing doesn’t do anything” is ridiculous. If it didn’t do anything WHY DO IT IN THE FIRST PLACE? Because artificially getting stronger would have zero impact on how far you can hit a ball, right? Logic is a hell of a thing.

            • Please note my use of the word “may”
              Also please note that people are just wildly throwing out speculations all over this here shiznit and my statement shouldn’t even warrant a second glance when ranking the most ludicrous.

          • well, i wouldn’t say do shit..

            but you’re right to an extent, if i take the best PEDs in the world its not going to turn me in to a good baseball player, you need the foundation.

    • haha, so that’s how Cano ‘fixed’ E5′s swing?

  6. I am SO glad that the list wasn’t made up of Jose Bautista, Edwin Encarnacion, and Brett Laurie. Even if it was ploy to get page views and some free publicity that would ruin my day.

  7. Can we call his source BigBalls or some such thing. Just please no riffs on Deep Throat like they do with every fucking political scandal after Watergate. How many “gates” are there in Washington anyways.

  8. Your post is great and everything Stoeten, just wondering why it’s not on DJF not getting blanked?

    • on DJF not getting blanked*

      • because this is his website? fuck kind of question is that

        • I think it’s because DJF is technically a Jays blog and this doesn’t have much to do with the Jays. Not that I’m complaining, it’s an interesting story.

        • Just that it’s not exactly Jays-related news and having it here (inderectly) encourages people to use the words PEDs and for example Edwin Encarnacion together in a sentance. The same FUCKIN sentance.

          • Anyone who does that is an idiot, of course, and where this story is posted isn’t going to change that. So… yeah.

            This is where I write.

          • Also, I’d say the Melky stuff and the fact that it involves Yankees makes it totally Jays related.

            • Seriously? Melky was caught when he played for the Giants and his name isn’t in these fresh allegations other than to add credibility to the claims, unless I’m missing something…?

              The Yankees stuff is fair ‘nuf considering it’s half their line-up and by far and away aways their best player

              • his name is in the Miami report….which this is somewhat about……

                Man, you guys are hard on Stoet… just happy to read as much about the jays as we get to on the DJF during the offseason.

                You know what i think

                Everyone who nit picks him should go start their own blog and fuck off.

                remember, its a blog….not Barwawa Walters here, ffs….how many days until real ball?

                • It’s a fair criticism and the followup hyperbole was no worse than your hyperbole from the other side.

                  Its not directly Jays related, it would have been probably a better fit on GB but its not like the Yankees exist in a vaccuum away from the Jays. As someone who avidly reads both I’ll both admit that it occurred to me too and then in the same breath call you all mouthbreathing pedants.

  9. I dunno, to me it has the gut feel. Its almost like, the claims are SO outlandish, that it most gives it a sense of credibility.

    Like, Granderson would be a huge shock to many I think. If he was just trying to get page hits, why add Grandy? Its not like he needs him to add pizazz to the report (Arod, Cano and Braun add plenty of fireworks and would generate just as many page views while bei g “safe” guesses). The addition of Grandy is what is making a lot of ppl be like “oh its def not true”

    But the guy broke the Melky story and took a ton of flack for that only to be proven right . He has a track record here.

    • I hope the whole story is nonsense. It’s bad for baseball.

      • I agree. As much as I do not like the Yankees, I really would like to watch a relatively “clean” game. This would prove we are far from that point.

    • It’s not a particularly long track though, eh?

      • It’s common once you develop a leak, to try and flesh it out. The way you do that is intentionally leak a few different stories to a few different people. Similar but different. Then you see which one makes it out. This could be such a case.

        Those exact names, making it out to the world, show where the leak is. Then nothing ever comes of it except some guy gets fired and we don’t even notice that.

    • Cano’s dad is going to be so angry.

  10. I don’t care about the other guys, but if granderson was a ped user that would hurt a little bit, he’s one of the nicer guys in sports. would hate to see that.

  11. I call bullshit… I think.

  12. Cano would be the only significant loss for them (if this story isn’t bullshit that is) Granderson would sit for a sizable chunk due Happ related injury and A-Rod probably sits the year regardless anyways. Wonder how much Cano would lose off his upcoming free agency contract…

    The more annoying thing would be by virtue of A-Rod that it would extend the Florida aging clinic story and launch fresh demands from the commentati that other folk (Melky, Gio and the like) be suspended absent any failed test.

    • Can’t be suspended if you are hurt. Would serve it after he comes off the DL.

      • Can they take him off the DL early… I mean do they have to pass an MLB physical? If no, then is there anything to stop them from taking them off early and let them continue rehab while the suspension is being served?

        Beyond the shamelessness of it I mean.

        • I highly doubt the Yankees would be able to do this. Other than shave a few days off. Any edge is an edge but not to an extent that it would be noticeable. Either way he would do a minor league assignment once he is off the DL and not suspended.

          • I cant seem to nail down the actual rule but from what little I can find, MLB DOES allow an injured player to serve his suspension concurrent with an DL injury he may have.

  13. “His having seemed to have hit on the Melky info before everyone else, though, isn’t exactly a compelling reason for us to believe history is about to repeat itself. What’s helping to give the story legs, however, is the fact that Bisceglie is hardly the fake account, “are you calling me a fucking liar?!?!?” kind of troll we associate with outlandish Twitter rumours based on information supposedly leaked to one super-special little snowflake of an internet user. He’s owning– genuinely, I think, and not particularly comfortably– the absurdity that he’s the one who may be breaking a massive story here.”

    That’s what stuck out about this to me. Most of these anonymous internet rumour-breakers get all huffy and defensive when people question them, as if we’re all supposed to just believe what they say even though no one knows who they are and they have no credibility. This guy gets it and understands the skepticism and takes it in stride.

    • It’s very possible that the blogger is sincere and all. But that does little to verify the data itself. Being right last time means more, but still doesn’t mean this is for sure.

  14. I hope that people are paying more attention to PED use, as it deserves. I’m sick of hearing pundits like Eric Karabel not talk about it becasue it makes them sad. I’m glad to hear Buster Olney address the issue on the Baseball Tonight podcast, and moreso the fact that the leage and the players are talking about tougher penalties.

    We also don’t want a witch hunt, but rather than “baseless speculation”, I think it’s more appropriate to call this “unsubstantiated allegations”. Just sayin’.

    • Not gonna lie, touting points of view gleaned from Olney’s podcast is unlikely to sway readers of this site into considering said points of view.

    • Buster Olney is the epitome of a tired old fart.

  15. how many days until real ball?

  16. I we need to get rid of Cano, Granderson or anyone else, we just need to throw Happ on the mound to hand out a 6 week “suspension”.

  17. If the day comes that a Yankee could get suspended for PEDs – MLB will make it legal

  18. Reyes is 2 for 3 with a HR, 2 RBI
    Edwin is 1 for 2 with a RBI
    Nanita is 2 for 2 with a RBI

    all against Cole Hamels.

  19. baseball should have just thrown up their hands and said ‘fuck it’ and just let the guys juice. not everyone who uses can actually hit, and it would have given baseball a reason to build bigger stadiums. Of course the bigger problem than cheating is the health issues that these products can cause or might cause, and that not everyone wants to look like the incredible hulk when they retire. This stuff is getting old hat pretty quick though, so hopefully April comes very quick.

  20. I’ll just use my usual response to these stories:

    I don’t believe it, but I’m watching now.

  21. You know the one thing that really came out of this is that Stoeten should have a picture of a beautiful lady at the end of posts like these

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