Cleveland Indians v Toronto Blue Jays

OK, let’s try this again.

The brooms are out for the Clevelands as the Jays try to put one in the win column, sending crafty left-hander Mark Buehrle to the hill to make his debut, squaring off against shitty human being Brett Myers.

For the sake of our collective sanity, they probably want to take this one before John fucking Farrell and the Red Sox show up tomorrow.


Wilner tweets that Mark DeRosa is in today because John Gibbons wanted him to play two days in a row (he’ll face lefty Felix Dubrount tomorrow), and because he’s got good career numbers against Brett Myers. Gibbons also says that Arencibia will catch Friday and Saturday, but not Sunday, and Rajai Davis will play in the next couple of days as well.

Brendan Kennedy clarifies, saying that Davis will spell Colby Rasmus tomorrow against Boston’s lefty.

Kennedy also tells us that the club has no plans to go to a 7-man bullpen until Brett Lawrie comes back, which… is fucking dumb. Apparently they’re being cautious with Casey Janssen.

Speaking of, Kennedy reports that Sergio Santos is unavailable tonight after going on back-to-back days, and Casey Janssen is questionable as well.

John Lott tweets that over 15,000 people showed up at Coca-Cola Field in Buffalo today for the Bisons opener, Alex Anthopoulos among them.

TV: Sportsnet

And now the lineups, by way of the live box score at And for those of you who’ll be out and about, be sure to follow all the action on your phone with Score Mobile

Toronto Blue Jays

SS Jose Reyes (S)
LF Melky Cabrera (S)
RF Jose Bautista (R)
1B Edwin Encarnacion (R)
DH Adam Lind (L)
C J.P. Arencibia (R)
3B Mark DeRosa (R)
CF Colby Rasmus (L)
2B Emilio Bonifacio (S)

Mark Buehrle LHP

The Clevelands

CF Michael Bourn (L)
SS Asdrubal Cabrera (S)
2B Jason Kipnis (L)
1B Nick Swisher (S)
LF Michael Brantley (L)
C Carlos Santana (S)
DH Mark Reynolds (R)
3B Lonnie Chisenhall (L)
RF Drew Stubbs (R)

Brett Myers RHP

Comments (330)

  1. Please Buehrle–Save us from ourselves.

  2. Anyone else having trouble loading DJF on Safari? Getting Blanked seems alright, and Chrome has loaded it, am I alone?

  3. Let this commence!

    Game is on SN1 because of hockey. The fork!

  4. nice feature change on this year: affiliate scoreboard by team

    Gose 3 for 4 today in Bison win

  5. I love that there’s Blue Jays games ALMOST EVERY DAY

  6. Buerle’s velocity makes Cecil look like Aroldis…

  7. Sonofabitchin’ Clevlands are starting to annoy me.

  8. Sonofabitchin’ Jays are starting to annoy me.

  9. Kindly, fuck off Brantley.

  10. And with that, Buehrle has a 13.50 ERA, what a BUST!

  11. ESPN player poll with some Jays tidbits (World Series), O-dog, and some unsurprising shit about Youkilis and AJ PIerszynski

  12. WTF, a runner in scoring position? What is this?


  14. Right on Jose!

  15. I think that’s the way this is supposed to work

  16. Jose ain’t fucking around tonite

  17. That never stops being cool

  18. Test that mans urine!

    Just fucking rocked that pitch

  19. Lind continues to impress

  20. Wouldn’t it make more sense to sit Lind v the lefty and have Colby in cf?


  22. Trade that bum Arencibia

  23. Did not expect!

  24. Ladies love JP’s power-stroke.


    • +1. We are back to Cito Ball 2010. Grip & Rip. Dwayne Murphy must have given the boys the pre game speech.

      That porch area looks pretty good.

      Can you get beer there??

      I went to the opener & it was closed.

  26. David Attenborough digs the long ball

  27. Send ‘Em Home Early Buehrle really does work fast.

  28. Apparently JP doesn’t intent to go gentle into that good night.

  29. Have to say I always enjoy watching Brett Myers get knocked around. Fucking guy punched his wife, he’s scum.

  30. so Jose Reyes goes Rick Ross and Melky has Drake for walk ups

  31. Wow haha nice John Farrell diss promo

  32. The mom in that Cialis commercials a rocket

  33. Buck seems to be very enthusiastic about the new Hannibal show

  34. The back of that rogers sign looks fantastic!

  35. Come on…back to back hangers.

  36. After watching the promo for the upcoming Boston Series, I have a new fantasy.

    My hope is that the Jays go 15-0 against the sox and before we play the last series, the Red Sox season securely in the toilet and riddled with drugs and injuries, and Farrell has his final press conference and just pisses his pants and says something like “What the fuck do you want me to say? I’m a big fucking idiot and Im now saddled with a piece of shit team and I’m not magic and cant fix this fucking rotation? I dont even know how to stop them. All those new players and the olds ones dont fuck up like I use to teach them”

    • They’re used to that in Boston, Pitino had a breakdown like that when he coached the celtics.

      “Guess what? Larry Bird isn’t walking through that door.”

  37. Nice pair of meatballs there. The Jays starting 5, in order of how good they will be this season:

    Morrow, Johnson, Dickey, Happ, Buehrle

  38. Jesus Fuck!



  40. Romero has to be playin’ with some voodoo shit down in Fla.

  41. that looked like a hanging curveball to me and all Lind can do is a weak grounder to first ??

  42. Just looking up Jays minor rosters . . . Aaron Sanchez is listed nowhere. Anyone know why or where he going to go this season? Is he hurt?

  43. Good God why is Adam Lind on the team still? Someone put me out of his misery.

    I think I’d prefer this starting five to protect Edwin:
    1. Reyes
    2. Bonafacio
    3. Bautista
    4. Edwin
    5 Cabrera
    6. (healthy Lawrie)



  46. Dear God Johnson

  47. There’s always next year.

  48. Delicious, Delicious DP

    love the glove

  49. fuck yeah Boney

  50. that Reyes slow jam walk up song sounded like his own voice

  51. OH FUCK. Dont even start with this.

  52. Oh fuck no.

  53. Reyes on the 60 day DL.


  55. Shit shat my pants

  56. Don’t you ever scare me like that again

  57. Jose feels like he was kicked in the head by a donkey (whhaaaaa?)

  58. I blame the turf lol

  59. Its the turf guys

  60. Im glad im not the only one who’s heart skipped a beat.

    it’s not good for the body though.

  61. Eddies due here

  62. CHICKEN WING!!!!!!!!!

  63. Chickenwing Fuckin sanwich

  64. Chicken Wings!!

  65. Chicken Wing!!

  66. Chicken wing activate!

  67. There’s the wing. KA-BOOM!!

  68. more sauce please!

  69. First Chicken Wing of the year!!!

  70. That feels more like it!

  71. WHAT HAPPENED WITH JOSE??? I’m in class and just following on the MLB Gameday… fuuuuuuck.


  73. I would like to see a Matrix-like tracking shot of that frozen rope

  74. The peaks and troughs of this inning are causing a mild stroke in my skull

  75. Thought we had another

  76. So good to see everyone laughing in Spanish.

    Dickey just enjoying the show

  77. Im stoked for JJ to pitch against the sox

  78. You knew they’d get a few bombs. Brett Myers has given up 1.3 hr/9 in his career.

  79. I think Buehrle will be fine. The homers aren’t a huge deal when they’re solo ones.

  80. shitty beans

  81. Buehrle throwing batting practice here.

  82. When do we hit the bp?

  83. Jack Morris really simplifies the game.

  84. Wow

  85. Holy cock! What is this now?

  86. heartbreaking.

  87. Misses his pitbull

  88. This makes grown up Jesus cry (anyone can make baby Jesus cry)

  89. Relax ladies…

  90. Glad to be paying this guy 20 mil in 2015

    • Let De Beers pay it.

    • That was probably a big part of the price of getting that deal done. I doubt the Jays asked for Buehrle to be included. You take him to get Reyes and the 1 year of Johnson and hope he doesn’t stink completely.

      • +1 That’s a fair analysis. Buerhle is being paid for past performance, not what he can do in 2013,2014 & 2015.

        that being said , if he can give the jays 175 innings of 4.50 ERA, that will be OK.

    • To be fair I think he’ll age pretty well considering he’s not a guy who relies on gas to put guys away.


  92. Aaron Cibia MVP

    what up now, haters


    i screamed like a child

  94. Colby and Lind take notes !!

  95. The mistake pitch master gets another mistake pitch!

  96. GSMC–
    He was more than worth the quote.

    “Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”

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