Eight-year-olds, dude.

The Jays try to bounce back from their manager’s failure to score two runs on Dylan Axelrod tonight, as they go for the series lead against the visiting White Sox, with J.A. Happ on the hill taking on Jose Quintana.

That creep can roll.

Jose Bautista is out again with back spasms, as mentioned in the previous post, which apparently can’t just be lingering soreness that nobody can goddamn well be expected predict the end of with the accuracy of a electron microscope. No, seems it requires some kind of fucking conspiracy theory on the level of “It’s not a lie when we know the truth,” John Gibbons making moves to intentionally backfire, the Marlins being willing to make the same exact trade with the Jays either with or without Mark Buehrle and his massively backloaded contract in it, or whatever other hopelessly inane things from the comments section that had me holding my face in my hands out of shame for humanity for half the fucking afternoon.

So… yeah. Go Blue Jays! Or maybe just “Jays,” if you’re not into the whole brevity thing.


There hasn’t been any new scuttlebutt to speak of since I tacked a bunch of it onto the Bautista post below.

However, for your between-inning listening pleasure– and because there was no Daily Duce– here’s today’s edition of the Getting Blanked Podcast.

TV: Sportsnet

And now, the lineups, by way of the live box score at theScore.com. And for those of you who’ll be out and about, be sure to follow all the action on your phone with Score Mobile

Toronto Blue Jays

RF Rajai Davis (R)
LF Melky Cabrera (S)
C J.P. Arencibia (R)
1B Edwin Encarnacion (R)
3B Brett Lawrie (R)
CF Colby Rasmsus (L)
DH Mark DeRosa (R)
2B Maicer Izturis (S)
SS Muenenori Kawasaki (L)

J.A. Happ LHP

Chicago White Sox

CF Alejandro de Aza (L)
3B Jeff Keppinger (R)
RF Alex Rios (R)
DH Paul Konerko (R)
1B Adam Dunn (L)
LF Dayan Viciedo (R)
SS Alexei Ramirez (R)
C Tyler Flowers (R)
2B Tyler Greene (R)

Jose Quintana LHP

Comments (293)

  1. That young buck Ortiz looked amazing. Glad we picked him up.
    So who are we picking up on waivers tomorrow to replace him?

    • Jeffress because he cleared waivers and got back to Buffalo. It’s time to start over so bring him up again. If he fuks up we can re bring up Bush who also found his way back to BARFALO-see a pattern here>?

    • LOL!. Remember we aren’t supposed to be concerned about the 8th man in the bullpen.

  2. Ortiz fired up that Rasmus just saved his bacon.

  3. Ortiz has been Horrid, I understand that gibby is taking the loss and wants to just go to bed, but there is no reason for Ortiz to be in the bigs over anyone else who is in the minors

  4. So does Romero become a long reliever? A sixth starter?

  5. I’ll admit I’m being a dick here, but…

    HolierThanTao says:
    04.16.13 @ 9:56 PM EDT

    I’d much rather lose 7-1 than cough it up with 2 consecutive walks in the 9th, which were the winning runs. Delabar cost us the game.

    How’s this game going for ya? Better than last night?

    • lol….I so just looked up that same comment from last night. I was curious to see if the fake name was around tonight.

  6. Where have you gone, Joe Bautista
    A nation turns its lonely eyes to you (Woo, woo, woo)

    • speaking of dickhead comments…here is a solid golden nugget. About 3 days before Cordero was traded for bag of happy balls.

      • FamousAmazingGuy says:
      07.17.12 @ 9:53 PM EDT
      not sure why they’re burning coco in a low leverage situation?

      • I feel like Justin Trudeau.

        Can live down my clearly sarcastic comment, or my stroll down the catwalk.

    • We’d like to know a little bit about you for our files
      We’d like to help you learn to help yourself
      Look around you, all you see are sympathetic eyes
      Stroll around the grounds until you feel at home

  7. Man, do I love hearing those Rios chants down 7-0

  8. EE is gonna rake if when/if all the other bats wake up.

  9. travis hafner and vernon wells would be the top 2 hitters on this team.

  10. I take some small amount of pleasure in all the shitheads last season who were pretty sure Mottola would magically make the hitters Murder’s Row.

    • I don’t.

      I was hoping they were right.

    • Mottola is a good hitting coach.
      You’re the shithead.

      • I was hoping too Karl but I always wondered “how much is it Mottola and how much was it Vegas?”
        We’ll see , I guess.

      • Here’s the thing Karl. I’m not ripping Mottola’s abilities just the belief people had that Murphy was somehow retarding the offense. So get fucked.

    • Can’t turn shit into gold. Of tonight’s starting 9 only 2 (at best) have any business being at the major league level. The rest are quad-A or worse (yes, including Maple Boner Brett). And one of those two (EE) is notoriously streaky and hasn’t hit anything so far this year. Don’t think we can realistically put any of this on Mottola.

    • I was one who really wanted Mottola in here, to see what he could do. Early and all that, but so far it’s looking a lot like previous years (hacky, lots of power, low obp). Of course that’s probably due to the hitters themselves I guess.

      • You basically made the point I was making that the morons couldn’t follow. Hitting coaches are not magical beings that make hitters great.

        It’s not Mottola’s fault anymore then it was Murphy’s. The thing that sucks is the dome is closed and the ball carries. Sucks the team isn’t taking advantage.

        • Totally agree with you, people were so vehemently flipping out on Murphy last year, even though we scored runs. It’s more down to the hitters than anything else.

  11. Bets on strikeout #4?
    Low and inside junk get him?

  12. GO LEAFS GO!!!

  13. Breaking: Goodwill Among DJF Posters

  14. The Golden Sombrero.
    Ineffably sad.

  15. Am I missing anything yet?

  16. What on Earth is the point of DeRosa anymore?

  17. Meanwhile, the Red Sox are looking to go 10-4 and the Yankees have won 7 of 8 since that 1-4 start. Thanks Arizona for blowing a three run lead in the seventh.

    • that’s what makes baseball fun. The veteran based teams that we all laughed at are outperforming us so far.

      Kawasaki had a 10 pitch at bat & get a walk,

      maybe he could teach the others some things.

  18. I don’t know why I keep on coming back. I can confirm that the season is blown. It’s too late to turn this ship around! We know what we’ve got and it isn’t good enough!

    I absolutely won’t be subjected to this anymore! I simply won’t do it to myself.

    It’s all over!

    I’m out and, furthermore, I will not be back. I’m not watching another game this year and I will not return to the site!

  19. this team is nowhere close to a contending team.

    once again the 2010 team stands as a highwater mark.

  20. bring back gaston.

    while yer at it, I’d love to have Molina, Scutaro, and Villaneuva back, thanks.

  21. Current scene in Bluejays locker room:

    Alex lets himself out and walks down the hall to the
    locker room – regards Brett Lawrie -


    He’s not even aware of Billy. It’s just like any other
    night as far as Brett is concerned. He dances to
    a CD of funk music as he dresses, until he becomes aware
    of Billy standing there, and smiling, he kills the music.

    (nervous laugh)

    Getting swept by the Red Sox at home. Having Long lead off the ninth with a
    triple in a one-run game and not being able to score a runner from first with nobody out, is that fun?


    Then what the fuck are you having fun for?!
    This is what losing sounds like.

    He heads out.

  22. We should make Kawasaki the hitting coach instead.

  23. Me thnks AA has a mess on his hands. I think he’ll try to trade his way out of it. It’s not really a surprise and there’s time to turn it around obviously but…the turn over for one offseason was huge. Added to that the injuries to key players, high expectations from fans, the media, players themselves etc and it’s not looking so great. There are gaps despite the talent on the team. It kind of reminds me when the Jays were building up mid to late 80s, 90-91…you have to find the right talent and personalities and get lucky on the injury front. So, I think AA will make a big move to fine tune this team when he sees what he’s got…the reality is the team has not had their A lineup on the field yet because of injuries, so it will interesting to see how he fixes things

  24. Good news and bad news…
    The bad news – we struck out 10 times as a team tonight. That’s 37% of our at bats.
    The goods news?
    We are 6-9 baby! 69! Heeeyyoooo!

    • 7 of those were from Brett and Cletus though.

      The rest of the outs were pop-ups to Adam Dunn.

      • why did they even play tonight? this was another in the long line of of Jays “just collectin’ the ol’ pay cheque” nights. every player was garbage.

        how many times have we been horribly blown out already? 5? 6? a pathetic team to be sure.

  25. These Bautista comments via Arash Madani are harrowing. Does not sound promising at all.

    “Bautista says he is still in pain, his back wrapped in ice. When muscle tightness/ pain diminishes, he’ll be back. No timeline. #BlueJays”
    “Bautista said Monday morning he was “really, really tight.” Says it’s “painful to move and play.” Can’t really sit without pain. #Bluejays”
    “Bautista said tests on the back “came back clean.” If I do anything athletic activity related, it’s just going to make it worse.” #Bluejays”
    “Bautista: “Right now, I feel when I wake up in the morning, I should be ready to go.” But each morning has pain/muscle tightness. #Bluejays”

    • Nothing we can do about that.

      That’s tax pain.

    • Clearly, he’s never heard of Robax.

    • Agreed the comments are disturbing. So he was in bad shape on Monday. Isn’t able to do anything athletic yet Gibbons said he was available to pinch hit yesterday.

      It would be nice if Stoeten could explain why Gibbons & Bautista have different timetables for Bautista’s return.

      Are these quotes a precursor to bautista going on the DL.?

      Was the last 3 games a fake out by Gibbons saying he’s OK, be back tomorrow ,ear infection yada yada. ? Does it matter anymore what the Jays say about injuries?

      Why not say from the beginning that they don’t know if the injury is serious or not?

      Even Gibbons says “it’s not early” anymore based on twitter tonight.

      Ball’s in your court, hipster in chief.:)))

    • He is making his money regardless.

  26. I can hardly wait to see how somebody tries to put this loss on Gibby.

    • As the late great George Carlin said:

      Think of how stupid the average person is, then remember that half the population are more stupid than that.

      It’ll be a doddle.

    • Noone will blame Gibby tonight, but don’t the Jays have to co ordinate their messages.

      Why is bautista describing an injury as being more severe than Gibby?

      Are they trying to confuse opposing managers? fans?

      Stoeten likes to blame the fans that ask about injuries as “tin foil hats” yet Madani is getting Bautista to give interviews where he describes himself being in pain, yet is “joking around” with Melky & Reyes in the clubhouse.

      Is it not cognitive dissonance to pretend everything is OK with Jose when the Manager & Coach are telling different stories?

      • There does seem to be a disconnect between various factions associated with the Jays.
        I don’t beleive in any conspiracy theory or the like but the reports about injured players are being glossed over.
        Whatever the reason, it is annoying.

  27. We traded half the farm for a bunch of chubby old rich guys.

  28. I wish we had a farm system.

  29. Test

  30. If I’m bonifacio, I’m taking 50 ground balls a day, spending equivalent time in the cage or thinking about finding a new sport. Because he brings very little to the table as a baseball player.

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