Now, now, don’t worry, this isn’t a clip that has anything to do with the stupefying amount of insanity spewing forth from the denizens of a comments section that I am now genuinely fucking dumber for having read. It’s wordplay!

Great stuff from PlayFunGamesPictures, and a crotch grab in the direction of @theREALnoahb for sending over the clip.

Comments (79)

  1. Fuckin bravo!

    Sign those two up.

  2. It’s amusing that you are so irritated by the people who visit your site Stoeten. Maybe try being less of a whining pussy, so terribly offended by those who aren’t as ‘enlightened’ as you are. Buck up son – take a vacation or something.

  3. Delightful!

  4. I applaud Stoeten for having the fortitude to wade into and respond to even a fraction of today’s inanity.

    • I agree. When shit in here goes crazy I can at least shut the computer down. The poor bastard has to come back and do it again tomorrow.

  5. Fucking balls out!

  6. PLAYOFFS!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

  7. Took me a few moments to figure out that the guy on the left played Don Cherry in that made for CBC TV movie… crazy.

  8. Caitlin’s welcome to enjoy my Josh Johnson.

  9. Seriously Stoeten, while I really love your transformation into a guy that actually gives a fuck, I have to ask you, when exactly IS it time to be concerned? You tell me that?

    I am an understanding guy, I really am, I have been able to ignore shit so far and chalk it up to a team just needing to gel and find their groove. But as of today, Ill admit, I am beginning to get a little impatient. I am not like a lot of the masses that expected a video game on easy record, I knew there would be some growing pains. However….. they are dropping what should be EASY games right now to teams that they should be walking all over.

    I am not hitting the panic button, I am also not freaking out but at what point would you so kindly give your permission for people to get concerned. Chemistry, gelling, whatever aside, on individual skill alone this team should not lose a series to a team that has the likes of Wells, Francisco, Overbay, Nunez, Nix and others in their every day starting line up.

    • It’s like getting your hair cut. You don’t go from not needing a hair cut to needing a hair cut. You go for a while, then one day you wake up and have a little piece that won’t do what you want. It’s annoying but you wear a cap all day so who gives a fuck. Then a few weeks later you think, hmm, getting to that point where I need a hair cut. But then a few more weeks go by and your hair gets longer cause you’re lazy. Eventually you look at yourself and realize you need to cut your hair cause you’re starting to look like a fucking hobo.
      Don’t worry, we’re not at the hobo stage. At best, we’re at the little piece sticking out part.

    • A 97 win team– ninety seven!– still loses a shade over 40% of the time. The Marlins have won four games. The Astros have won five games. These Wells-Overbay-Nix Yankees have won ten. Bad teams beat better teams all. the. time.

      I’d expect some confusion over this from people who’ve never really paid attention to the ins and outs of a baseball season before, but from someone who presumably has, are you actually serious here???

      The Tigers last year were 25-31 on June sixth. They had been swept by Cleveland, Seattle, and the shitty 2012 Red Sox. They went to the World Series.

      The Jays right now have the same record, or are within a half game either way of having hte same record, as the Rays, Angels, Dodgers, and White Sox. Should those teams panic? Are you writing off the damn Rays and Angels???

      • Careful Stoeten, you’ll be accused of being a Rogers apologist.

        • Have not heard that expression in a long time.

          The next 11 games are against, Baltimore, Yankees,& Red Sox.

          If the team plays 3-8 or 4-7, it will be concerning but not season ending.

          I hope the defence starts to “Gel”, once they get to know each other. They haven’t played together.

          I would also like to see more of Butterfield’s shift now that Lawrie is back & healthy.

          Some better quality at bats would help.

      • We all understand that teams can get off to slow starts and still do well for the season. There are many examples of teams having shitty records in April only to come back and win the division. However, like some have mentioned here in the past, its not so much the record that has people concerned its the way they have lost games, look disorganized on the field, total lack of offense etc… These other teams that had bad starts and came back to win the division, perhaps they lost some close games, ran into hot pitchers etc etc.
        I think many people are not panicking, but are concerned and it is justified. People are not idiots or not knowledgeable about baseball if they are concerned about how the Jays have performed so far this season.

        • +1 Bruce

          The Jays have been missing 2 Joses for several games. Bautista & Lawrie have been together for 3 games.

          It’s true the other teams that had slow starts may have had run into hot pitching etc…

          I think it’s better to focus on AL East Comebacks. If our pitching became Tampa Bay Rays good, then we could win games with 3 -4 runs.

      • Everything you say here makes perfect sense and I truly understand what you are saying..BUT….some times teams dont win early on because they are just not that good.

        this team has a fundamental problem and has had it for several years. this problem is not likely to just go away …

        THEY DONT GET ON BASE. this has been a problem for SEVERAL years …and in fact some of the guys are actually WORSE at it than they were before (see rasmus and lawrie)

        arencibia, lind, lawrie, izturis, dont walk. rasmus has forgotten how to walk.

        of course the team is going to increase their on base as the season goes on but it will be batting average driven…because right now their averages are insanely low and that will not continue. but the obp’s will likely never reach league average.

        I dont give a shit about how often you strike out if you get on base..but for many of the guys, the reason they dont get on base is because they strike out so much, they simply dont have a chance for batted ball luck to kick in.

        I just think there are too many black holes in the lineup and that was only made worse by reyes injury.

        i truly wonder if rasmus is so fukked in the head that he might never be the guy he even was.

        lawrie is going to apparently be a hack master (not what he looked like his first year)

        izturis has combined for a sub 1 WAR his last three years.

        im worried about this team and its not short term results based.

        • Rasmus was walking at a 9.3% rate coming into today with a .352 wOBA.

          Yes, you’re pointing out a legitimate concern, but you’re kind of overstating it. And apparently you’ve decided what Brett Lawrie is going to be after a handful of at-bats? Come on.

      • Look Stoeten, Ive been coming around here for a long time, I have been a jays fan since…. hrmm shit, well let’s just say I saw games at Exhibition stadium so Ive paid my dues. I am not a fair weather fan, I am a diehard and I have always maintained that even when the jays are a losing team, theyre still entertaining. But in the past bunch of years, I and many others really didnt go into seasons with any expectations. For me it was like, if they win, thats awesome, if they lose, who cares because it’s not a playoff team either way so Im not going to get rattled about it.

        But this year, there’s obviously expectations. The Tigers that you are so nicely inviting into this conversation were in a terrible division, they were in a division with teams that enabled a come back from a bad start, the Jays dont have that luxury this season because while the teams around them are a little weaker than years past, they are still in the AL East. Every game from game one to game number 162 has meaning and if they miss out on a playoff or wildcard spot at the end of the season by say… 5-6 wins, this slow start is going to be put on display as the reasoning.

        Moving on, my main concern right now arent so much the losses. If the Jays had played every game competitively with heart and ended up losing tight games, I would still have the same level of confidence. But the thing thats shaken my confidence is that there’s been some big blow out losses. Thats a little disheartening. But, I also wasnt one of those people walking around thinking “the jays are a sure thing 2013 world series champ” like the masses of morons fueled by over hyping tire pumping media outlets. I have had a level head and I will continue to have a level head. All I was saying is that right now the team is missing heart apart from Kawasaki and flares of others here and there.

        • Heart doesn’t win baseball games. They look like they don’t have spirit because they’ve played badly, not the other way around. And holy fuck, how quickly you forget the rally to tie the game today. These things happen. It’s baseball. It’s a long season. It’s early. I know nobody wants to hear this but it’s damn true. Relax.

          • I remember the rally like it was just yesterday.
            It’s like we needed it because we were losing again. Everybody knew it was coming because of the offensive juggernaut that the Jays are.
            Seriously,some players are going to over perform, some under perform. Both groups are usually a surprise.
            AA will make adjustments when he deems it’s the right time.And he’s not encumbered by long term contracts so he can do it.
            It’ll take a minmum of 40 to 60 games to know what he’s got.
            And sorry to tell you but there will be more players on the DL this year. Hopefully those replacements will work out.

  10. rogers center did its own dickey photoshopping at todays game….it was all star wars themed, (ei. the jedi council of the knuckler).. good on the staff for being a little more young hip and edgy.

  11. lassssssssssssst place….

    wow, did not expect this when i bought season’s this year.

    • It’s fucking April.

      • And next comes May.Then June.
        If the Jays continue the trend and fail to live up to their potential there’s gonna be some sad pandas at DJF.
        Let’s look forward to the turnaround.

      • I love when stoeten gives us updates on what month were in. Make sure to let me know when….O SHIT I forget what month comes next. O well Stoets will let me know! Good ole Stoets!

  12. Whichever one of you motherfuckers said “Baseball Battlefield” is the best baseball movies of all-time lost a huge amount of respect and is the quintessential baseball hipster.

    And I would love to see a super fucked up Japanese movie about baseball that was totally random but that was not it.

  13. That’s fucking sacrilege. And anyone who ever tries to denigrate “Major League” in any way, shape or form is a fucking piece of shit and that’s an objective fact.

  14. Jesus H. Christ! Comments like bobby’s make me want to put on a lab coat and discover a technique for a retroactive abortion!

  15. I’m not too worried about the team in general, they’ll find their groove with this much talent, I am starting to get a bit worried about this year though. It’s still early but to hit the 93 win mark it took teams to make the playoffs last year they need to play close to .600 ball the rest of the year. That’s a tall order for any team and the Jay’s are getting fucked over for inter league, they get the Giants, Braves, Dodgers, Padres and Rockies (Padres being the only shit team). They can’t afford to keep losing winnable games, especially within the division for a ton longer or it’s going to be a difficult road to October.

    • Agreed. They do have tough interleague competition this year.

      for 93 wins they need 86/144 or 59.7% win percentage.

      I think it could be a bit lower this year with 5 strong teams in the AL East. Perhaps 88-90 to win the division.?

  16. Fuck yeah bobblehead day

  17. nice one, keese!

  18. Fuck off Stoten, you apologist twat! You suck on too much of Wilbur’s heeb cheese.

    • You shouldn’t sugarcoat your opinion of Stoeten.
      Tell us what you really think.
      Might want to spell his name correctly, just so I don’t confused with someone else.

    • Holy fuck. Did someone tell the idiots on the bluejays.com comments section how to find DJF? Comments section gone from the usual level of at least marginally tolerable insanity to ‘unfiltered toxic diarrhoea’.

      • The Blue Jays board has been overrun by negative posters & Yankee posters. There are about 20 threads a day blasting everyone on the Jays.

  19. I have to put in my two cents.

    I’m almost at the point now where I’m more annoyed by people saying it’s early than people saying the season is over. It has been a horrendous showing so far this year. While there’s nothing to keep it from turning around tomorrow (it’s so early I was thinking of today’s come-from-behind-win as a nice catalyst) it has not been pretty to watch.

    It doesn’t take a fucking genius to look at the games they’ve played and say that it’s been bad baseball. It doesn’t take a fucking genius to say that there’s a lot of games left to be played. But it takes an ignorant fuck to say that the bad baseball they’re playing has bearing on the future. Of course it fucking does. It doesn’t mean we panic like the seasons lost, but most people panicking aren’t saying the seasons gone, they’re just disturbed by what they’re seeing.

    Like I said, My two cents.

  20. These losses would be less annoying if they would just make other teams beat them and not beat themselves.

    • +1. Loup throwing the ball toLawrie was very annoying.

      On friday, it was Rasmus to Arencibia.

      They have to reduce these game killing errors.

      • Izturis fucked up royally by not catching that 5 foot underhand lob from Kawasaki. Would’ve got Buerhle out of the inning, instead they scored 2 runs.

  21. If you hear someone bursting sporadically into OK Blue Jays from the very last row of the 500s, that would be me.

  22. Not a must win today., but…..

  23. Hey guys if you’re at the game keep your eyes open for these guys, specifically in the right field bullpen area. Makes you hate the Yankees even more. I wonder if this goes on in every stadium they play at. http://www.sporttonetwork.com/hired-goons-how-the-yankees-keep-the-home-fans-quiet/

  24. Going to the game today. Kawasaki is batting leadoff!! Atta boy Gibby! Makes me want to forgive you for leaving in loup vs. righties yesterday instead of going to delabar. Alas, whats done is done.

    • Loups not a loogy so I don’t get why you’d be mad at the manager. OR did you really believe left handers can only throw to left handers?

  25. Great vid.

  26. that was well done.

  27. never comes this way. but if you keep this up, I’ll keep coming back. Solid Creativity.

  28. 1-balls and strikes….i still say (and have for years) that the jays routinely get hosed (more so that other teams) by the calls ups and the timing of those calls – though, again – admittedly – i am a home-r

    2-why people think gibbons is a great manager i dont get. i dont dislike him for any particular reason nor do i think he is an awful manager, i just dont think there is anything exceptional about his baseball managing skills – certainly not enough to get a second kick at the can. i have always thought he is the kind of manager that (will win) wins around 80 games regardless of the personnel…

    3-rasmus is doublebadawful

    4-please god lets have different people do the tv broadcasts in the near future. they are brutal.

  29. ps-this bit is a ripoff of the hockey radio bit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4fYVteC8jo

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