martyyork

For those of you unfamiliar with the long, sordid history of this site– back to the days of inside jokes like the one above, in which I believe Bergkamp likened Marty York, formerly of the Globe and Mail, Metro, and (perhaps not formerly) submitting blank Hall Of Fame ballots save for the written-in name of Pete Rose, to the spam emails he got for dick pills– Marty York, and his reality-detached ramblings, was used as something as a foil for us. Which is just a way to mangle the language into sounding more polite about how we pretty much just looked at what he wrote and mocked it with the derision of 1000 suns. Which… actually was par for the course for every writer who crossed our paths back then, now that you mention it.

York was a particularly delicious target, though, for reasons that Parkes scathingly, hilariously (now for different reasons) pointed out when York crossed the line in mid-May of 2008, suggesting that in the near future John Gibbons would be fired by the Blue Jays, and that his replacement would be Cito Gaston.

“Remember when the Jays were going to sign Shawn Green?” Parkes asked at the time. “Or when Josh Towers was on his way to San Diego? How about when Toronto was interested in adding Roger Clemens and Andy Pettitte?”

He theorized…

My thinking is that York is the constant subject of ridicule among some of the higher ups in the Jays organization, and they totally get a kick out of fucking with him. I can almost picture a suited junior J.P. getting York’s extension at The Metro. “Marty, guess what,” he says in a hushed tone while the entire office is quietly chuckling around his office. “It’s so and so from the Jays. I’m phoning to tell you that we brought Barry Bonds up to Canada for a try out. Unfortunately, he went off like a crazed grizzly bear at customs and ate four officials. We’re trying to keep this hush hush, but because of your . . . journal . . . journalistic integrity,” he almost loses it there, “I trust you with this story.”

Of course, it rather insufferably (for a number of reasons) turned out Marty was right, prompting me to later quip that, hey, “know you know old saying, even a fuckin’ hack is right twice a decade.” We were so charming, weren’t we?

Now, obviously, that one shining moment certainly doesn’t give York a free pass shovel whatever bullshit he wants to into the ether and expect people to take it at least semi-seriously, except… maybe it kind of does?

And despite having been disappeared from my radar for a number of years now, York– and it genuinely does appear to be him– has resurfaced in a big way this week– in pretty much exactly the way that I predicted he would, if we’re dick-measuring shots in the dark here (and I think we are)– tweeting to his tens of followers that, once again, John Gibbons is on his way out as the Jays’ manager.

And he brought another gem on the subject as I was writing this post:

Personally, I don’t think the Jays could possibly be that fucking stupid– it’s not like Gibbons has done anything wrong or that the players are so fucking meat-skulled as to need some big, pointless, showy move to give them a sense of urgency about their situation. But… well… you know the old saying…

Comments (60)

  1. The York link takes you to a Hollywood gossip page…unless I’m missing the point entirely.

    • Ha! Fixed!

      • So many snarky comments out there for the taking….so little time. How’s Perez treating you?
        OK, I’ll stop now.

        • My ladyfriend sent that, because we’d met those people last NXNE and they were clearly an item by then. Way ahead of the mainstream gossip rags! Guess I forgot to re-copy the link I was aiming to use.

  2. You know I RT’d that yesterday, just in the middle of a RT binge of the “fire Gibby” crap, and then I stopped and did a double take because I couldn’t believe it was THAT Marty York. And yet here we are.

  3. How does it appear to be him?

    • He’s tweeting at and being retweeted by Frank DeAngelo for his stuff on NextSportStar Radio (which is a DeAngelo thing). Plus, the photo he uses doesn’t appear to be out there except from his Twitter account (and it’s clearly him). And… uh… it’s a pretty obscure fake account for someone to make and to have kept up for this long, with links to his actual reports, just for a thing like this.

      I can’t say that it’s definitely him, though, which is why I didn’t.

      • The idea that someone created a fake Marty York Twitter account and kept it up for so long would be the most deliciously hilarious thing ever. Oh God I hope that’s the case.

      • You had me at “Frank DeAngelo”.
        Be a Cheetah!

  4. God that Marty York Twitter account is painful to look at. Among all the normal stupid he decided to find time to RT a Gregg Zaun should be the new manager tweet.

    Simply. Stunning.

  5. Any reason to suppose that AA–having said that this time he would follow his gut and he had the right guy etc etc–would fire Gibbons that damn’ quickly? It’s only been a month. I don’t see Beeston being that reactive either.

  6. This is absolutely not Marty York. He spells players’ names incorrectly and calls them the Blow Jays.

  7. Marty York has a paltry 89 Followers on Twitter. I’d feel bad for the guy if he wasn’t a Dyson-sphere-sized douchebag.

  8. HAHAHA York retweeted some kid with 15 tweets who said Zaun should be manager. Journalism!

  9. Don’t forget that he worked for Sportsnet at some point, and they wonder why TSN is so much popular…..

  10. That’s quite different than what Alex Anthopoulos said on Baseball Central today.

    http://www.sportsnet.ca/baseball/anthopoulos-not-looking-to-make-changes/

    • yeah, because AA is always on the up and up. Just like when he said Romero was still pegged to be the 5th starter and them blam, he’s demoted.

      • Well… he WAS pegged to be the 5th starter. Then he WAS demoted.

        This is known as time moving forward and things changing.

        You may be surprised to hear that we have traded away Fred McGriff. Check it out.

  11. i would love to see Cito back at the Helm. He righted the ship for 2 years with a lot less talent on the field than there is now.

    Give Cito the reins and things will improve!!!

    CITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITOCITO

    • *not sure if trolling or genuine ignorant Blue Jay fan who thinks a manager adds or subtracts something more than one win per season

      For the record John Gibbons is a good manager. If anybody thinks Cito Gaston is a better manager than Gibby than they should stop talking about baseball and go have a threeway old-school baseball fuck fest with Hawk Harrelson and Harold Reynolds.

    • I actually sortof love Cito (mostly because of the mustache), but you’d have to be retarded to believe with any confidence that he would make this team better just because he is a Proven Winner (TM).

      It IS true that the 2009-2010 Blue Jays had no business being as good as their record wound up being, but I refuse to accept that it was because of Cito’s magical powers. Plus, he’s a dick for ruining Snider.

      Actually as I’ve written this post I’ve almost talked myself into Cito as a Ron Washington-type motivator for a skilled veteran team. If I didn’t love Gibby I’d be down.

      • actually….CITO knew what the fuck he was talking about in not playing Snider.

        snider didn’t get ruined. he just wasn’t that good.

        the ‘ruin’ angle is a convenient narrative that the CITO haters like to roll out to support their perspective.

        but the proof is in the pudding and the 2009-2011 years with CITO at the helm were the most enjoyable I’ve seen.

        2012/2013 by comparison are steaming piles of shit.

        • Actually….. we’ll never know.

          • Farrell was the manager for 2011 and 2012. Just saying. I’ve always loved Cito, but he was worst then Farrell handling pitchers. Coaches have expiration dates, and truly think everyone involved, including Cito himself, are happy with him in a consulting position.

        • In 2011, John “fuckface” Farrell was running the show, but nice try.

      • Cito did have a pretty awesome stache.

  12. Bobby V. was an unmitigated dumpster fire and got a whole season in Boston. Gibbers not going anywhere.

  13. Fun times had by all on this one.

  14. the only way this type of move could be remotely plausible is if some asshole top exec in Rogers gave the ultimatum to Beeston that he wants a head and it is either AAs head or Gibby’s. Even so it seems pretty ridiculous.

  15. Not sure if this link has been posted, but Jay Jaffe’s stuff is usually pretty good.

    His latest article looks at the Jays horrible start as well:

    http://mlb.si.com/2013/04/29/toronto-blue-jays-ra-dickey-slow-start/

  16. Idiot found alive and well on Twitter, shocking!

  17. No way its him or true…..and if it is him….well, everything you guys said about him in the past are true, or confirmed.

    Also…..dickey is in my Pool – annnnnddddd…..said something about an MRI this week? WTF?????

  18. Mark DeRosa called a players-only meeting Sunday to address “bad vibes” in the clubhouse:

    http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/madden-blue-jays-find-stripes-article-1.1329939

    • This is exactly what has been worrying me this last week (and many others I’m sure). Not that they will continue to be this awful all season but that the hole is getting scarily deep.

      • Read the SI article posted by Jay Rule also.
        Aah , fun with stats. It’s gonna be a long hill to climb.

      • yeah, no shit. this is exactly what I tried to say last week while getting gunned down again by the Blogmeister.

        you can’t go down 9-17, no matter what goddamn month it is. early, middle, late, etc.

        which is what I meant by saying that April is exactly as unsignificant as it is significant.

        whether you play this shitty/ have this shitty a record in april or june or september, you’re not going anywhere.

        these guys need to right this ship NOW. Bonifacio’s early dive bomb in the field + 1st pitch bunt EVERY FUCKING AT BAT has become a bummer contagion and put a damper on everyone. Reyes lack of defensive hustle was no help either.

        get a real 2nd base player NOW.

        I believe the bats can turn around and the pitching too. But the Defense is INEXCUSABLE.

        2B is worth sinkhole of fucking errors and listless batting. Melkey Cabrera’s approach is going to do squat all with 4-5 guys in the lineup going down in at-bats on 1-3 pitches.

        you fucking clowns. Gibby should be offing heads. The errors must stop and the patience at the plate must be enforced. Sit the whole fucking lot of them if they continue to swing at garbage and first pitches.

        seriously. I’d rather see a lineup/defence full of lesser talents like Kawasaki as long as they’re taking their pitches and making generally good defense. These other fuckers need to get real and set their Homerun egos aside and get fucking serious.

        seriously….getting beaten by Overybay, Wells, Nix, and Ben Francisco???

        what kind of dipshits are you guys?

        • Last week? So what was their record at the time you were being such a fucking moron, then?

          Go back to coaching bantam hockey, for fuck sakes.

          • I meant as the week progressed. I thought that was obvious. At the start of the week, I wasn’t too worried but by the end of the week things have gotten a lot worse. Some of it is perception, but when you calculate the winning percentage they likely need from here on out, it’s starting to not look good.

            Not everyone is a moron Stoets, stop viewing every comment through that filter.

        • @ Tocher
          I gotta admit I was in the “it’s early” camp before the Yankee series.
          But reading the SI article and the fangraphs article, I wonder if i’ve been drinkin the kool aid.
          Such lofty expectations before the season started.
          Ya gotta figure AA and his staff know the numbers too.

    • yeeaaaaa…we’re fucked

  19. So far this has to a fan’s worst case scenario. Jays god awful start, Farrellball shot from a gun in Boston. Please, please, make it stop!

  20. So is stoeten’s beard going as a sacrifice

  21. Is it me, or does ol’ Marty’s look scream “Sportsnet” in the first picture and “Sun TV” in his Twitter pic?

    • It’s not just you – it totally occurred to me too. That or ‘mid-life crisis’. Judging by his tweets, the guy has an awful lot of rage to share.

  22. twitter is gross

  23. Hey guys I’ve been gone for a while learning how to Lawn Bowl, play Jai Alai and – other – various – what – have – you.

    I have also been having a sphincter of a time logging onto this website Stoeten. Shape up or ship out son!

    So, about the season. Ummmm. Wow. Ahhhhhhhh. 30 more games I’ll give them, then I’ll be drinking whiskey with the shotgun on one knee and the slugs on the other.

    Oh, and about Gibby, make the world a better place next time you hear trash talk about him, punch the prick right in the kidney.

  24. In case anyone here is on death row or a sadist, here is an hour of the worst anything you will ever see. No, you aren’t having a stroke, there are indeed 10 minutes of ads before the show starts:

    http://www.nextsportstar.com/index.php/show/marty-york-april-26-2013-2/

  25. Marty york’s best scoop ever was in the late 1980s when he speculated that the CFL was thinking of adding a second team in Hamilton.

  26. Thanks for the trip down DJF memory lane. My friend and I were just reminiscing about the pre-Cito afternoon that we first read about the Boggs head, and became instant die-hard fans. Courageous and telling, as always.

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