massholes2

These guys are enjoying life more than you are right now.

The Red Sox are 19-8 and the Jays are 10-18. Fuck everything.

Scuttlebutt

Interesting stuff from Dirk Hayhurst on today’s Baseball Central about the substance on Clay Buhholz’s arm last night. Shi Davidi looks into it at Sportsnet (a post that also has the video of Dirk’s comments), with a screencap from the broadcast. I tweeted a different, somewhat less compelling one myself. That Skeet Ulrich looking motherfucker!

John Farrell and the Red Sox are, rather unsurprisingly, suggesting that it’s just rosin on Buchholz’s arm.

Mike Wilner tweets that John Gibbons told reporters that Josh Johnson played catch ahead of a scheduled bullpen yesterday, and that the pain in his triceps was still there. He shut it down and will rehab in Florida.

Ricky Romero was the first choice to come up, says Gibbers, according to a tweet from Chris Toman. The club got positive reports from Dane Johnson, who had been working with Romero in Dunedin, and he won’t be on a pitch count in tomorrow’s game.

“If he didn’t feel good about it and we didn’t feel good about it, he wouldn’t be here,” says Gibbons via a tweet from John Lott.

It’s not all bad, though. Brendan Kennedy tweets a pic of the Red Sox lineup, which tonight doesn’t include David Ortiz. An actual break for the Jays!

More good news, as Barry Davis tweets that the roof, which was being tested yesterday and today, will remain open for tonight’s game!

MacArthur also tweets that he figures tonight’s tilt against the Red Sox is a big one for the Jays, marking the difference between an actual series win and having lost four of six at home to the division leaders al-fucking-ready.

Barry Davis tells us that the Red Sox have hit 14 home runs at Fenway… and 16 at Rogers Centre.

John Lott tweets a link to his post-game piece from last night at the National Post, in which Mark Buehrle said, “I feel I’m right there, a few pitches away from having a quality start.” Let’s fucking hope so.

TV: Sportsnet

And now the lineups, by way of the live box score at theScore.com. And for those of you who’ll be out and about, be sure to follow all the action on your phone with theScore app

Toronto Blue Jays

3B Brett Lawrie (R)
DH Adam Lind (L)
RF Jose Bautista (R)
1B Edwin Encarnacion (R)
C J.P. Arencibia (R)
LF Melky Cabrera (S)
CF Colby Rasmus (L)
2B Emilio Bonifacio (S)
SS Munenori Kawasaki (L)

J.A. Happ LHP

Boston Red Sox

CF Jacoby Ellsbury (L)
LF Jonny Gomes (R)
2B Dustin Pedroia (R)
DH Mike Napoli (R)
RF Daniel Nava (S)
3B Will Middlebrooks (R)
1B Mike Carp (L)
SS Stephen Drew (L)
C David Ross (R)

Ryan Dempster RHP

Comments (432)

  1. Jesus! To watch or not to watch? On the one hand the Jays might win. On the other hand Farrell’s Fucktards will probably not lose…

    • Usually I remain in the denial stage until Labour Day, but acceptance is coming early it seems. I’m definitely past anger. I feel the worst for Gibby really.

      Never thought I’d pine for the teams of my namesake. At least they were fun.

  2. Not sure if it is even worth worrying about now but can Romero be sent back down once Johnson comes back off the DL? Or would Happ have to go down? Assuming there are no other injuries and RA Dickey isn’t put on the DL.

    • Can he? Yes why not.

    • Option is for the whole year so he can get sent down and brought up as many times as they need. Once sent down he can’t come back up for (I think) 15 days unless he is an injury replacement.

      • That sounds tue.

        My concern is that if Romero has a meltdown & gets set down again , does he go back to Dunedin?New Hampshire? Buffalo?

        It seems that he has some “psychological issues”.so I I hope he wouldn’t need a month in hiding to recover again.

        I like Ricky, but the Jays mysterious handling of him & injurd/not injured playes is turning into the X files. Frustrting as a fan to see what is going on.

  3. Time to put fuck face Farrell and the Massholes away and take this series!

    Here’s hoping for a more watchable game.

  4. Lose tonight, and……

  5. With a case of 28 beside me I’m prepared for:

    • a bombardment of superimposed ads
    • shitty audio because of the bombardment of superimposed ads
    • a shitshow with the Jays taking it up the dickhole
    • Kawasaki throwing the ball away at some point
    • Bonifacio throwing the ball away at some point
    • The Dome no doubt being closed for some inexplicable reason

    Bring it on Massholes. Do your worst.

  6. IF Romero looks OK going forward (insanely big if)..

    Do the Jays look to move Buerhle and eat some money?

    I know it’s early (still kinda) and for all we know buerhle will have a 3.90 ERA by September. But man, he just looks like he’s got nothing out there.

    I hope he can turn it around, but if the other 5 guys can out pitch him, they have to think about it.

    • The Jays would happily give Buehrle away right now for nothing, even if it meant putting Mike McCoy in the rotation for the rest of the year. But it ain’t happening unless we eat most of the money.

      Until today’s announcement that Johnson is fucked I was thinking we’d see a deadline deal where they traded Johnson + Buehrle + (some) cash for a C prospect. Now it’ll have to be something like the Angels-Yankees Wells deal where we pay 75 percent of the contract to unload him.

    • @James. I read today that Buerhle has had slow starts the last 4 years in a row, so maybe he will get better as the season progresses.

  7. Ok the Jays have to have this one. BELIEVE 2013!

  8. She’s in the bag (maybe it helps that I’m half in myself) were going to win this series.

  9. You might as well drink jays fans! It’s about all you have going for you!

  10. Started drinking at 5. We’re gonna win!

  11. There are worse starts.

  12. Boom!

  13. Somehow matching Dickey up with the pudgy kid just makes sense to me.

    • @Max.

      I think it’s a bit rude that Dickey gets the heavy kid & JPA gets the cute girl who likes cotton candy.

  14. 1st inning recap.
    Top : Woo! Woo!! Woo!!!
    Bottom : Woo! Fuck. Woo! FUCK!!

  15. Brett just really wanted to jump.

  16. Uh Jack, Happ’s not exactly a young pitcher.

  17. Please tell me I’m not going to have to listen to Morris ballwashing the Red Sox and talking about grinding out at bats.

  18. Looks like Happ is getting squeezed… who would have thought the Jays might not get some close calls?

  19. Fuck you JP.

  20. Anyone else hate Will Middlebrooks and not know exactly why?

  21. Arrrrrrr ancibia!!!!

  22. David Ross is a cuddly looking fella’

  23. I really have no idea why I tune into these games. Just finished listening to Buck & Co. talking about Middlebrooks getting an error on a sharply???? hit ball instead of their beloved Jays improving their batting average. Give me a break. Middlebrooks played the ball as if he was the Harry Caray statue outside Wrigley Field, does an “ole” that would make any matador proud. If he had at least knocked the ball down or come close to it, I can understand Buck’s reasoning, but the last I saw Middlebrooks is still in the same pose. Get in the game, Buck!!!

  24. And Bautista gets an error for that. He and Colby need to get together and give JP the beating of his life.

  25. Jays are already making me double fist my beers tonight.

  26. Any guesses on how Romero does tomorrow night?

  27. Absolute garbage! It’s done, no point in watching the rest. I refuse to submit myself to any further punishment!

    I’m out!

    I won’t be back for the rest of the game. Further, I strongly suggest that the rest of you follow me.

    Season is over!

  28. So much for Colby cutting his mop having a positive effect on his ability to put the ball in play…nice try though.

  29. Ugh. Lead-off doubles.

  30. Remember when they said at ST, that Emilio was good for 60 Sb?
    When where and HOW??
    Fukin useless turd

  31. It sucks when you can’t help but feel your out of the game already, in the 2nd inning, and only down 1 run.

  32. No runs scored!!

  33. Munenori Kawasaki, baseball philosopher and raconteur

    “Life is short, so why not enjoy the game.”

    “If I was a baseball fan, I would just drink beers and shout during the game.”

  34. Lets put up 10 this inning. That feel so good right about now.

  35. Relax all.. The Blue Jays are a perfectly cromulent baseball team.

  36. Kawasaki should not be stealing. Even with a great jump, only a truly terrible throw prevented him from being out.

  37. At some point hopefully the broadcasters put two and two together and realize that JPA’s shitty pitch framing is the reason the pitchers don’t get borderline calls.

    • Yeah, the framing has been brutal. But it hasn’t really been the cause of all the brutal calls. But definitely attributes to pitchers having to throw more pitches and giving hitters more chances, which in turn keeps the team on the field. I don’t think J.P. can be considered a long term catcher if this team want long term success. I really dislike how long it take J.P. to present a target for the pitchers, even after talking about it. He hasn’t been doing his team many favors back there, that’s for sure.

      • They are also not getting the borderline calls because they aren’t pitching particularly well. When you are throwing strikes consistently then you tend to get more close calls it seems. But ya the umps have been shit and so had JP’s framing.

  38. Man, the umps really f’ing with us this year. Dicks….. They’re all dicks!!!!!

  39. I’m starting to believe in The Man From Muncie.

  40. Just realized why Lind had been taking so many walks. It means he doesn’t have to leg out any hits.

  41. Let’s take the parrot for a walk.

  42. It’s OK you guys, I put the rally cap on during the pregame.

  43. SQUAAAAA – motherfucking – AAAAAK!!!

  44. god freaking damnit

  45. Good one Edwin.

  46. Only the jays, I mean, right?

  47. Of course. Dude was falling apart, gets a visit from the pitching coach, and magic! — double play ball.

  48. This team needs some more Slushy Magic. Yeah, that’s what it needs.

  49. I even said out loud to myself ‘come on inning-ending double play’ facetiously, and then it fucking happened. /wrists

  50. Where is the fucking baseball iq from lawrie and ee. Just idiotic baseball. Dempster is struggling to throw strikes. So what do they do? Swing and give him outs!! And these two are supposed to be among our best hitters. Just awful.

  51. Also did I see that the Dome is open? Does Rogers really care about fans? I hope so because I am going tomorrow and would LOVE an open roof

    • +1. i will be at the game on saturday. I hope the roof is open but Dickey is supposed to pitch so if its windy maybe they will close the dome to help Dicky?

  52. Does Happ know that the idea is to not get to 100 pitches before the 5th inning. This is just another typically Jay pitched this year. Happ isn’t horrible, but he is far from easy to watch. I’m sure I have an ulcer by now.

    • Hahahahaha you think this is bad? Romero is pitching tomorrow.

      • The way this season has gone, I wouldn’t be surprised if Romero pitches a complete game. After all the shit that has happened this season, his demotion and the thought that we had the luxury of having a bevy of quality pitching, it would only make sense that RR was the first starter to dominate for just ONE day.

        Hopefully the adjustment to his mechanics allows him to challenge hitters because I hate watching out starters walking player after player. It’s getting really fucking lame.

  53. With apologies to Steve Earle, ahem—

    Just when every ray of hope was gone
    I should have known that you would come along
    I can’t believe I ever doubted you
    My old friend the jesuscristo blues
    Another lonely night, a nameless town
    If sleep don’t take me first, you’ll come around
    ‘Cause I know I can always count on you
    My old friend the jesuscristo blues

    Lovers leave and friends will let you down
    But you’re the only sure thing that I’ve found
    No matter what I do I’ll never lose
    My old friend the jesuscristo blues

    Just let me hide my weary heart in you
    My old friend the jesuscristo blues

  54. That EE at-bat might have been the worst I’ve seen all year. Given the talent of the hitter, the shit command of the pitcher and the situation, that was worse than any 3-swing Colby K. Fucking brutal.

  55. Rajai would have made that catch. Too bad we have captain fat ass in left field.

    Who is that again? Brett Wallace?

  56. I just turned on the game. How is Dana Eveland, oh, excuse me, J A Happ doing tonight?

  57. I think Happ caught whatever ball-throwing bug Romero caught last year.

  58. SHUT THE FUCK UP JACK MORRIS! #tabbyamazinglynottheworst

    • If you are referring to the notion that most good pitchers tend to be worse early in games, then settle in, it’s something I’ve heard before (regarding Morris, among others). I’d like to see if anyone has studied it, actually.

  59. Toooo many, walks.

  60. Such good ABs by the red sux, got to say. They know what theyre doing and can actually go 3 pitches without swinging.

    • This is how teams like the Red Sox, Yankees and Rays beat the Jays fairly damn consistently.

      Their approach at the plate is institutional.

      • The jays need to get coaches that preach this shit until its ingrained in these fucking players heads. Some like jpa are hopeless though.

        • @afdg.

          Good point. The ex jays who play for the yankees seemed to be more patient last weekend.

    • Just like the Jays did about 20 minutes ago…until EE fucked it up by trying to pull a pitch an inch outside the strikezone

    • Well I agree they have better at bats than the Jays, why swing when happ has walked 3 in the inning. The balls are all over the place.

  61. Get him the fuck out of there. NOW.

  62. 95 pitches and doesnt get out of the 4th….thats…pretty impressive actually.

    • And he walked Middlebrooks, who is basically a moron at the plate, for one of those w alks.

    • How can you give up 7 walks and 3 base hits in 3.2 innings and only give up 2 runs? amazing

    • Drabek managed to throw 105 in 3+ innings in his famous start last year in Minny-Brutal. So was this actually. And yeah, fukin Edwin trying to play hero by pulling a ball 2 ft outside nad into the DP we go. What a bunch of stiffs. Why does this team even bother with coaches? They obviously aren’t effective

  63. Brad Lincoln says “thanks coach, I guess?”

    • It does little for the confidence when the team buys you a return ticket via Greyhound from Buffalo.

  64. Miraculously no runs scored in that inning either. Maybe this is their game plan, Wear out the Boston hitters!

  65. Melky has a good swing but a terrible eye, like a more balanced JP

  66. Thank you Jack for insulting our general intelligence.

  67. Well either the pitch tracker needs some calibration or this ump is horse shit. I’m going with horse shit or a league-wide conspiracy to keep the Jays down

    • You need some extra tinfoil for that hat?

      • I fully realize that it doesn’t make sense and I my statement was a little tongue-in-cheek, however, we complain about the strike zone every game it seems. Even the announcers have started to question the calls frequently. When does the apparent trend become recognized as statistically significant?

    • It’s becoming abundently clear that JP can’t frame pitches. I think it’s costing us A LOT of strikes.

  68. cant believe how much drunk jays fans are lobbying for a job at Rogers. used to love coming here, not anymore.

  69. So Bonafacio is so shitty that on the ESPN fantasy baseball podcast they have a category called

    Bonafacio (as in this guy sucks)

    vs

    Bonafide (as in this guy is actually good).

    We have a whole lot of bonafacios right now.

    7 baserunners in 3 innings and only 1 run. and that 1 run came on a homer?

  70. I wish we ended up trading bonifasio when teams were inquiring about him. His value dropped huge

  71. Dempster is throwing absolute shit. Still can’t hit it.

  72. How is it that the Sox take scrap heap guys like Carp and Nava and turn them into serviceable players and we take serviceable players and turn them into burning wooly mammoth excrement on a stick?

    • We’ve addressed this already.

      People complain about how veterans/journeymen tend to have their careers resurrected once they don the pinstripes. Why do you think that is?

  73. Bud still hasn’t got this TV/Radio divide down pat yet.

  74. Hey fellas, we gonna win a series tonight?

  75. One more shut out inning and Morris and Buck will start talking about how Dempster didnt have it early on but Ground it out and figured out a way to win.

  76. Why are the Jays so shit at baseball?

    • I’m out of answers

    • A conspiracy perpetrated by Bud Selig and Jeffrey Loria would we the simplest answer. See Montreal Expos 1969-2004 RIP.

      • I refuse on principle to give Selig or Loria credit for anything.

        • Indeed, although Bud Loves to subtly claim he rescued baseball from financial ruin and and PED use all for a paltry 18 million plus per year.

    • The curse of Sean Hillebrand, he did a voodoo curse when he wrote “this ship is sinking” on the chalkboard, or wherever it was. Was it even Hillebrand? well the curse of whoever the fuck did it

  77. Just turned the game on…so – what’s HAPP-ening boyos? See what I did there? I’m pretty clever…

  78. I’m not generally one to let the guys off the hook but that ump is letting Dempster get away with all kinds of crap.

  79. Jays get absolute shit calls.

  80. That was way more of a strike than Laurie’s!

  81. LOL strike out, but hes on base… fml

  82. Real smooth there, JP

  83. Just be prepared… this team is going to look a LOT different come August… and that won’t be a bad thing.

    Salary should be around 40 million though.

  84. A well timed walk (bad call) and bloop single to extend the lead!

  85. Wow, Delabar really doesn’t like inherited runners, eh?

    Also, that run was a result of that bullshit walk that should’ve been strike three.

  86. Well, we still might win this game, but… between the way the season has gone, and those Cleveland horse fuckers steaming our city, country and team… I’m not really feeling this one. Good luck guys.

    Fuck Farrell, Fuck Delabar with inherited runners, Fuck Jack Morris, Fuck Cleveland, Fuck everyone from Cleveland, Fuck Lake Erie, Fuck Drew Carey. Fuck this season.

    • Kind of how I am feeling too. I’m not sure if I am just trying to avoid the pain but I keep uttering words to myself that are unfamiliar like “It’s only baseball” and ” Fuck the game I should take the wife out”……. god help me merry gentlemen for I have lost my way.

      • I fucking hate this shit. The season is so damn long and the Jays have completely shit the bed. When do I get to get excited again? In a year from now? Most likely 2017-2018 though (if the team isn’t moved by then).

  87. Time to put some runs on the board.

  88. Checking my fantasy baseball team and Justin Ruggiano has a 2.000 slugging percentage. That means he hit two home runs in one at bat right? Someone get Zaun.

  89. Do the Boston players think they are cool when they don’t button their uniform? Napoli and Gomes never do and they look like they think they are the bees knees. I want them to lose now just because of that.

  90. Fucking Wilner call on Jose flyout was terrible.

    • fire wilner.

      i mean…you gotta fire someone, why not the most self-assured simpering asswipe in town?

  91. Dempster has his eye on the Cy!

  92. why do starting pitchers seem to get better against the jays as the game goes along? still dont get that

  93. WTF? really?? dempster is pitching like cy young against the jays…… sports god just hate Toronto…

    • To be fair, Toronto player’s just don’t play well. In all sports.

    • The Jays have never hit good pitching well. Last year they were getting OWNED by Luke Hochevar. Dice-K also butchers the Jays.

      The Jays padded their stats during that inning against Livan Hernandez last year. That’s how they do it every year.

  94. Lawrie has found his stroke. Just takes one or two more guys to start hitting anywhere near their career numbers to kick-start this offense.

  95. Is it just me or does this catcher/pitcher broadcast duo have no idea that left handed and right handed hitters have different strike zones?

  96. Melky, you fucknugget.

  97. Just put Melky as the fourth outfielder. Rajai Davis is better than this shit.

  98. Did Cletus get a haircut? I think it’s given him magical getting on base powers. HAIRCUTS FOR EVERYONE.

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