Archive for the ‘Emilio Bonifacio’ Category


Because of course this was going to happen in the 20 minute period while I was walking to work: according to a release from the Jays, Emilio Bonifacio has been dealt to the Kansas City Royals for a player to be named later or cash, while Colby Rasmus has placed on the 15-day DL. This frees up one 40-man roster spot and two spots on the active roster, which have been filled by Kevin Pillar– as discussed earlier– and Munenori Kawasaki.

Never too late to fix your mistakes, I guess. Except, y’know, when it totally is.

Don’t get me wrong, that’s not to say that Emilio Bonifacio is what sunk this team, or anything like that. He’s just one of many parts of the compendium of cock-ups and underperformances that did the Jays in. Not that it’s necessarily his fault that he was miscast as a full-time player by a team drooling over the .296/.360/.393 line he put up in 2011, when he was last healthy.

Frankly, as much as sour fuckheads wanted to argue all season about how the Jays should have known he’d be this bad, it wasn’t the craziest proposition. Though he struggled at the big league level in his first full season at age 24, in his final three seasons with the Marlins, from ages 25 through 27, he posted a .280/.345/.362 line over eleven-hundred plate appearances, so anyone suggesting that anything close to this year’s disgusting .218/.258/.321 should have been expected is being pretty thoroughly disingenuous.

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So much for the silence, as Ken Rosenthal tweets that a source tells him that… well… you read the headline. And you’re about to read the tweet:

Rosenthal adds:

I’d think that would be a whole lot easier part of the sell than the fact that he, y’know, kinda sucks. Right?

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Calling 162 games every year is not an easy thing to do. That’s 500 hours (give or take) of talking non-stop about the same topic. While you get to cover some great games, you also have to cover the really shitty games. I gotta give credit to Buck – in my opinion, he does a good job. Sure, the BOWTEESTAH’s get annoying after a while, but such is the case when listening to someone talk for a long time.

I teamed up with Vince from to find some of the best/worst of Buck. If you don’t know about the site, it’s a catalog of all of Buck’s fuck-ups. He gave me a ton of material to work with so shoutout to him. So here you go, the Buck Martinez soundboard:

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Bonifacio Keep Calm

I do my best to try and make sure that all the posts on this site aren’t just variations of me going “LOL look at this instagram pic from one of the players!” but this is too good to let pass by without making sure as many eyeballs as possible see it. Emilio Bonifacio, the same mind that brought us Lo Viste, sent this to Jose Reyes, capitalizing on the Dominican Republic’s headline-making excitement over advancing to the World Baseball Classic semi-finals. It’s important to remember that things that happen in March often don’t have a gigantic impact on the rest of the season, but nobody would fault you if you started penciling Bonifacio onto your list of favourite Blue Jays.

Topical humour x internet meme humour + public social media = internet posts. It’s modern math, people. Emilio Bonifacio just wants some klout.

Not for the first time this winter, it would seem as though Dave O’Brien of the Atlanta Journal-Constitution senses something potentially brewing between the Jays and Braves:

During the Winter Meetings O’Brien had said that he was hearing that Bonifacio was available, and that the Braves– and especially manager Fredi Gonzalez, who had him when he managed in Miami– were interested, but he later clarified, explaining that the Jays didn’t want to deal him– at least not yet.

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