Archive for the ‘Home Opener’ Category

Demonstrating something resembling an actual understanding of certain players’ limitations against left-handed pitching, and Ben Francisco’s redundant-at-fucking-best position on the club’s roster, Blue Jays manager John Farrell has done some tweaking to his lineup heading into tonight’s Home Opener against lefty Felix Doubront of the Red Sox.

Rajai Davis replaces Eric “the Butcher” Thames in left field, while Adam Lind is dropped to fifth in the order, with Edwin Encarnacion hitting cleanup.

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Ugh, Canada: What the Flag?

Twitterer @yourbestfred sent out this pic from his hotel room at Rogers Centre this afternoon, and… um… I really hope that’s temporary. (Note: They’re cards). Or some kind of optical illusion. Or somehow, at the very least, not Rogers once a-fucking-gain trying to stuff corporately-branded patriotism down our throats in a way that we understand is positively cringe-worthy when we see Americans do it. Are they afraid we’re going to forget which country we’re in?

Look… I like Canada, and I like baseball, but what the two have to do with one another, I will never fucking understand. Y’know, beyond when grotesquely rich companies create crass marketing ploys premised on the idea that people outside of Toronto are dumb enough to believe that by pushing red and white in their faces, the club is acknowledging their existence, and validating their desire to watch the games and spend money on the product being pushed. I don’t hate the flag, I actually like it enough to not appreciate it being crudely exploited by folks who clearly understand the power of patriotism to help their bottom line. Of course, since I have a problem with mindless, maple-dick, sign-every-Canadian-ever patriotism, too– which never goes over well– I realize I’m probably going to be in minority on this one as well.

I’ll say it again, though: ugh. Please stop shoving the flag in our faces. (And fuck off with the National Anthems, while you’re at it.)

Update: You can see what the cards on the other side of the field look like here.

Instead of pissing and moaning, as usual, I would love be writing a post today about how the Jays have finally devised a sensible plan for limiting the tendency of fans at Rogers Centre to provoke multiple mini-donnybrooks in the upper deck during home openers. Shit, I’d even love to say that there probably really isn’t anything close to resembling a perfect solution to this problem– and let’s be straight, while this is admittedly a blog that isn’t unfriendly to the drink, we’re also fervently against dumbass violence, and the kind of moronic behaviour that incites it, so yes, these Opening Day Dickheads are, indeed a problem.

Unfortunately, today I have to write a post about how the Jays, as usual, have devised a solution with all the elegance of Roger Clemens getting shot in the ass with nandrolone in the SkyDome hotel– and none of the usefulness.

As reported by Colin Freeze of the Globe and Mail, at tonight’s home opener, if you had the misfortune of being broke-, cheap-, or late-enough to only be able to sit in the 500s, you’ll be limited to getting just one beer at a time from the beer carts that are already a giant clusterfuck during sellout games.

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