I’m not a particularly superstitious person. In fact, if you’ve read this site for any length of time you probably could guess what I think of most– if not all– superstitions. When the Jays opened the season, for the Game Threat, I Photoshopped an image of Jose Bautista and Edwin Encarnacion onto the heads of Joe Carter and Rickey Henderson lifting the World Series trophy in 1993. When a Facebook user wrote, “bad omen idiots,” I snarkily responded, “Oh yes, my magical powers of deciding baseball championships through shitty Photoshops has destroyed the Jays.”
Now, obviously I’m right about that. Obviously. I don’t have magical powers of deciding baseball championships through shitty Photoshops.
However, there was something else that I did in that post– that I did a few times during the spring, in fact. And that I did knowing– and intentionally spitting in the face of– the rummy coincidence it was connected to from back in the early days of the blog.
I wrote about it the first time back on May 11th, 2007, following the Jays’ having fallen to a ninth straight loss the night before.
If there is any group of people with the potential to be more breathlessly life-and-death than the Jays and their fans with every R.A. Dickey pitch during Saturday’s start in Kansas City, it’s CBS executives, and the producers of 60 Minutes. That’s because the iconic newsmagazine was in Dunedin early this spring, following the Jays’ new ace around for a day or two, putting together a piece on Dickey and the physics– no, Grandma, not the preternatural unholiness– of his knuckleball that will finally fill the airtime between Metamucil and dick pill commercials this Sunday.
Another turd-in-a-bucket on Saturday and the exploration of Dickey and his incredible skill miiiiiiight kinda fall flat, y’know? (He’ll be fine though, of course.)
CBS News lists the program as being set to air at 7 PM ET, but as they say in the TV business, check your local listings (which, for those of you youngsters out there, was a thing that they used in the wretched old days, before you could just stream whatever you want whenever you want).
I know, I know, we’re all probably just about Dickeyed out at this point, especially given his slow-ish start to the season, but 60 Minutes is kinda a big fucking deal, isn’t it? Check out a preview after the jump…
Me either! But for those of you who do, we’ve got a rather serendipitous one from the 100 Level over the weekend. Kinda odd that someone just happened to be filming in the exact spot at the precise time here, but… that sure is a whole lot of liquid to have had… uh… on ones person (or, rather, in one’s person) if you’re going to fake a thing like this. Also, there’s like $50 worth of Rogers Centre-bought booze he’s wasting there!
And the YouTube description definitely tries to throw us off the scent that the man with the camera and the film-ee knew each other, as it simply says, “Fat bastard puking his guts out.”
Of course, YouTube wouldn’t stop there, as someone calling himself “capnbeefcurtains” quips, “that is a lot of barf. well done.”
Off the heels of the pitch-perfect 2013 Blue Jays Adventure RPG video comes a new video-game parody about the Toronto Blue Jays for your viewing pleasure.
This one, called Super Baseball Toronto GM Ninja Battle is a street-fighter style tale of Alex Anthopolous and his rise to power as the GM of the Jays. I won’t spoil any of the battles for you, just know that digital Beeston is nails.
This video is part of a great longread from Canadian Business and is the master work of @Cashewmirman, a Jays must-follow and creator of such frequently awesome content that I am sincerely doubting my own abilities in comparison. Check out all of his work at Weekend Punks, which currently features an animation of Anthony Gose running through a wall.
In a video that’s pretty much already been described to you by the title of this post, Aaron Boone of ESPN visited the Jays facility in Dunedin this spring dressed as a tailor trying to sell a bit of bullshit.
Below the jump are the results… or something. I don’t know…
Instagram-ish, which… fuck, now I have this stuck in my head.
I spotted this in the College and Bathurst area last night, and to my foggy memory it would seem to me an even deeper intrusion into the city than last year’s outdoor marketing campaign, which I don’t recall straying too far away from the Rogers Centre– like, say, north of Richmond Street– though… it’s not like I was really paying all that much attention.
So… that’s something. Maybe?
Here’s another, spotting in its more traditional locale, at Adelaide and Peter, just up from the Dome.
Far better than my shitty snaps, though, is a little slice of fantastic from Hipster J.A. Happ– aka @JAHappster, aka friend of the blog @mattomic, aka Dr. Nguyen van Thuoc– who, after the jump, takes us on a tour through Toronto neighbourhoods, letting us know which MLB teams you’d most likely find out hanging out there.
Click the image if you want to see a bigger version!