Despite its annual success in the standings of the American League, attendance issues persist for the Tampa Bay Rays. Last year, the team was playing meaningful baseball right up to the last day of the season when they shockingly clinched a Wild Card playoff spot with an Evan Longoria walk off home run. And yet, the club still averaged the second worst attendance figures in baseball.

The plight of the local economy, the location of the stadium, a bad first impression, and the typical Florida sports fan’s predilection for football have all been cited as possible reasons for the lack of in person support that the Rays garner.

However, the real reason for poor attendance figures is far less complicated, and is directly attributable to this hideous “Zim-Bear” giveaway:

The grotesque figurine will be scaring children and scarring their psyches on June 29th.

Comments (6)

  1. It’s because they don’t spend enough money. Those cheap fucks…. maybe they should have signed Prince.

  2. That sure looks like they wanted to ensure future generations of potential Rays fans would be too scared to become actual Rays fans.

    And is it sick that I kind of want one?

  3. The horror…. the horror……

  4. I think it’s an improvement on the real thing, that said, maybe it might have a positive effect by doubling as a gargoyle if left on one’s roof to scare evil spirits away.

  5. They should do a Fed-Ex commercial with that thing.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *