On Tuesday, April 3rd, 2012, the Baltimore OriLOLes lost an exhibition game to State College of Florida, a former community college in Sarasota, by the score of 2-1.

Upon hearing such news, your first reaction might be to ask what players from the Baltimore Orioles’ active roster participated in this game.

To which, I would respond: “A good many.”

You might then ask, “Well, who pitched for the Orioles.”

And I would respond, “A member of the starting rotation, and two of the team’s expected seven Opening Day relievers.”

You might then ask if professional teams, when playing collegiate teams, don’t provide the pitching for their opposition.

I’d tell you to stop making excuses.

You’d then probably suggest that the game was little more than a controlled scrimmage, and really shouldn’t be looked at for the result alone.

I’d call you a horrible name, like “Orioles lover!” Then, I’d probably recommend you stop taking things so seriously, and just enjoy the fact that you can now say that the Baltimore Orioles lost to a junior college team in a game of baseball.

Comments (43)

  1. Get fucked in the mouth.

  2. Michael Garncarz: That was rude Sticky

  3. Opening Day needs to start.

    Why is this a story Parkes?

  4. The Mets would have done the same.. However they are smart enough not too even take up the challenge. Thank you Baltimore for saving Mets fans..

  5. The serious side of me says “anyone can beat anyone in a single game” (which is why the new wildcard thingy is interesting and watching sports writers try to “predict” it is hilarious.

    But the fun loving side of me just giggles at the OriLoLs and thanks Parkes for the morning chuckle.

    • I’m terrified of having the long months of baseball crescendo in the elation of the jays making the 2nd wild card, only to have them lose the play-in game. what a punch in the nuts that would be.

      • I live in similar terror and our season has not even begun.

      • I’d be heart broken for sure. But that also means we had an entire season of the Jays being in the hunt… and that’s pretty fucking exciting.

        Especially when you consider that this year is not the best our team is going to be. The Jays are still on the rise (I hope)

      • I’ve heard this from other fans occasionally, but would you rather have that scenario, or what we’ve endured for the past 18 seasons?

  6. Please take this blog down immediately or I will have my lawyers call you.

    • Call your lawyer? What a fucking loser lol… My daughters softball team could beat those sorry excuse of a professional baseball team.

  7. I’m defending the LoL’s, but did anyone bother to take a look at who actually pitched for Manatee-Sarasota? They’re not college players.

    That wasn’t your typical college squad – even the worst ML players crush college pitching.

  8. Sounds like OrioLOLes could have used Magglio Ordonez or Vlad in the lineup.

  9. Could the Jays use either of those players if Lind continues to struggle? Maybe Edwin could play first? 1B is easy right? As a former third baseman Edwin could easily play first right? Bring in a true DH. Who would you rather? Vladdy or Magglio? My vote goes to Vlad.

  10. The O’s are supposed to win the wild card according to every sports magazine in the U.S. The good old Jays are supposed to be fourth

  11. oh wow…just when u think it can’t get any worse…lol…

  12. I notice this story has comments.

    Must be piggybacking DJF again.

  13. hey, they’re like the Maple leafs

  14. I thought spring training games and exhibition games were

    1) Meaningless and
    2) Too small a sample size to draw conclusions from

    Please address this cognitive dissonance

    • The conclusion that the Orioles are a laughing stock is hardly based on this single spring training game.

      • I see. So one single game is the example that proves the rule that they are the laughingstock. And the Jays ridiculously good spring is the example that proves the rule that spring training games are meaningless.

    • You must be a hit at parties.

      • lol — good response — I am sure that is what some newspaper columnists, managers, players and gms also probably feel like posting when they receive comments

  15. Orioles provided the pitchers and a catcher. It was a charity game lasted 8 innings. What’s the big deal here?

  16. http://cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/17881336.jpg

    it’s not their fault they suck, it’s the fault of the big-market rays and blue jays

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