This week’s edition contains more Brett Lawrie hyperbole, Roger Clemens’ legal trouble, wealthy Joey Votto, Omar Vizquel being awesome and much, much more.

Miami’s a place that if you win, they’ll definitely come out. They enjoy their stars. They enjoy winners. I think (Heat president) Pat Riley and (Heat owner) Micky Arison have done a phenomenal job across the street with the Miami Heat. They brought in three megastars that are getting to know each other very well and hopefully will win a championship here soon. So Miami’s proven that if you have stars on the field and more importantly you win, they’ll show up a lot.

- Alex Rodriguez is giving Miami a lot of credit for a city that had to be told to “fan up” when the Heat were in the playoffs last year. Mind you, the Heat don’t have a swimming pool in their arena so…fair enough.

Hosmer sports a Mohawk that Kansas City actor Rob Riggle labeled ”The Warrior” when he took batting practice with the team in March.

- This description of Royals’ Spring Training is a combination of a lot of different words and names that I never thought I would see in the same sentence, yet seems weirdly appropriate.

He’s an emerging star. This guy will be a star. He’s the closest thing to Pete Rose in today’s game, in terms of his approach. And is talented, as well.

- Ken Rosenthal sees Buck Martinez’s Brett Lawrie hyperbole and raises him a fit of insanity

Ninety percent of what happened was simple, mental. I got lazy with my legs. That’s what happened, pretty much. I worried about everything else but that.

- Well yeah, Adam Dunn, that’s what happens when you don’t like baseball very much. JP Riccardi was right about  you.

The thing about it is, if I was building a new ballpark, I think one of the things about baseball that people gravitate towards is nostalgia. I mean, that’s why people love Wrigley Field and they love Fenway Park, because you can kind of step back in time.

- Lance Berkman is right. It’s like how everyone loves Skydome because you can kind of step forward in time to a post-apocalyptic future where everything is ruined and grey and the only resource we have left is cement.

It means a lot not only for the franchise but also for the city. It means kids can grow up emulating him and pretending to be Joey Votto.

- Dusty Baker makes a good point. I remember when I was a young boy, playing in the school yard, letting my imagination run wild, pretending I had $225 million…I was a weird kid.

When you’re 25, you wake up, get out of bed and you’re ready to take an at-bat. You feel like you can hit a triple, when you’re 45, you wake up and you have to go to the bathroom and you hope nothing is in the way.

- Is everyone as excited for the Omar Vizquel era as I am?

The government should not be afforded this second bite of the apple to parse Mr. Clemens’s opening statement from the safe refuge of their offices after they caused a mistrial

- Roger Clemens’ lawyers heard Mark McGuire’s “I’m not here to talk about the past” defence and were like “yes, this is amazing, I hope we get a chance to use this, it’s bulletproof!”

Given what went on here, this is a very special day, five years from now, you won’t find anyone against this. You can debate the economic advantages, but new ballparks just have enormous sociological value. It makes that city a better place to live.

- Bud Selig is really trying to talk himself into Miami being a good place for him to retire.

I’m very happy, it’s finally a great feeling, to be back and be with these guys from the beginning. That’s very important and huge for me.

- Let’s finish with a quote I have absolutely no joke for. It’s just always fantastic to see a once-great pitcher like Johan Santana come back from injury and start throwing again.

That’s all I got. Happy Opening Day, everyone!