Really starting to reach on these post titles. Tune in next week for “Quote Floats” or something. Also, I must add another RIP MCA cause it’s the worst.

Anyway, this week we have strange nicknames for Matt Wieters, jokes at the Marlins expense and I get all up on my soapbox.

At this point, I don’t know,” he said. “At this point, I don’t know. Going to have to face this first. It all depends on how the rehab is going to happen, and from there, we’ll see.

There’s a large part of me, the shitty part, that wants to make light of Rivera’s injury as it relates to him being a Yankee and me being a Jays fan. But I can’t. This sucks and I hope with all my baseball fandom that this is not how Rivera’s ridiculously impressive career ends.

He’s a baseball player, when you’re a baseball player, you can be 15 or you can be 50. If you know how to play the game you can play.

Just a truly amazing statement from Jayson Werth about Bryce Harper. It simultaneously says so much and nothing at all. I’ve read it thirteen times and I’m still not sure what it means. But I bet it’s interesting.

This is the big leagues, man. Anybody out of this locker room wishes they could have the opportunity to wear a uniform, so every time I come to this clubhouse, I’m proud of wearing this uniform. I’m blessed and thanking God every day I can come here and do what I love to do and play baseball.

Albert, please, when you speak that logically about your slump it makes it really hard for us to overreact and blow it out of proportion. Come on, Al, think of Buck Martinez…he needs this.

They’ll have to figure out how to hit in it, you tend to want to pull the ball more in a big park, because that’s where the ball goes out. That’s the way they built it, and they’ll have to deal with.

-          Don’t blame the size of the Marlins’ park for hitting troubles; blame those awful green outfield walls. No batter’s eye could ever accommodate for this monstrosity.

I think this is going to be it for me, this is going to be my last year

Just like Kenard, it seems like Father Time has finally caught up with Omar. What, you thought I’d be able to go an entire year without making a Wire joke when the Jays have a guy named Omar? I’m surprised it took me this long.

It’s just a dream come true for him, he was so excited and jubilant. He’s been close so many times, but to get this win at this point in their season is tremendous.

I hope at Christmas Dave Weaver gives Jared the biggest piece of turkey and Jeff is like “but I’m the oldest” and Dave goes “the big piece is for people with no-hitters, Jeff” and then Jeff runs off to his room crying. Or something. I haven’t thought about nothing else but this for the last two days, I swear.

I feel closer to the coaching staff than I did two weeks ago, I feel closer to the training staff and the players than I did two weeks ago. That’s a big part, too. Coming in, everybody goes, `Oooh, you’re Heath Bell the All-Star closer.’ Now I’m just a Marlins closer, that’s it. That’s what I want to be.

I mean, I know being the Marlins’ closer is a great way to make sure you’ll no longer be known as “the All-Star closer” but I didn’t think Heath Bell would be this cool and upfront about it.

Joe Mauer with power. Switch-hitting Jesus. Those are two of the nicknames handed down to the 22-year-old prospect before debuting in 2009. It took until 2011, his second full season in the majors, for him to silence his doubters.

-          Those were actual nicknames for Matt Wieters? Seriously? That’s amazing. Is this implying Jesus couldn’t hit switch? Is that in the Bible? I feel like after the whole resurrection thing moving to the other side of the plate would be easy. But what do I know?  Maybe Jesus Christ really can’t hit a curveball.

I hope he gets support, as fans, you have to realize people make mistakes even though obviously it’s not a situation any fan wants someone from their team to be in. But I know his teammates are going to have his back and hopefully this city rallies around him, too.

-          Here’s the thing, Alex Avila - people make mistakes, people don’t make hate crimes. Assholes make hate crimes. Delmon Young is an asshole. Don’t rally around him. I know I kind of made a joke about it last week but, seriously, why did we talk about Ozzie Guillen for a week and condemn him as the worst person ever but Young’s actions barely registered save for some news briefs?  It’s insane. This is a joke that sure as hell isn’t funny.