Matt Stairs Was Robbed

If I was going to rob the home of Matt Stairs, I would be very cautious. I could imagine being lulled into a false sense of security until late into the robbery when Stairs would come out of nowhere, holding his baseball bat, and win the game with a pinch hit home run. I feel safe in my assumption that these type of worries weren’t present in the minds of the actual thieves who broke into the retired slugger’s home in Maine while he was accepting induction honours from the New Brunswick Sports Hall Of Fame.

According to a CBC News report, burglars entered Stairs home and stole several pieces of jewelry including a division championship ring, an ALCS ring, and an NLCS ring. While disappointed, Stairs took news of the robbery in stride.

If I get it back, I get it back, but if not, the biggest thing is the safety of the family. If they’re trying to pawn off my rings, they have my name and the year and all that stuff. So, if you get a 16, 17, 18-year-old punk who’s trying to sell stuff to the pawn shops, we talked to all the pawn shops and gave them a heads-up.

Imagine being a 16 year old punk, and coming across the crazy gaze of this half-man, half-enraged animal:

The risk in no way equals the reward.

Comments (9)

  1. That Stairs head shot, while 400×274 in name only, remains no less menacing.

  2. While I’m usually the first to jump down the throats of those who value Canadian-ness above all else, I must admit it did warm my heart a little to read how eager he is to move back to Canada.

    Come home Matty, we’re all better for it when you’re here.

  3. So he’s been robbed twice. First by the baseball establishment who decided he wasn’t an everyday player early in his career, and now this. WHY DOES GOD HATE MATT STAIRS???

  4. Yeah, totally thought this was gonna be about Bill James and how he thought Stairs could have been a Hall of Famer if things had gone differently.

  5. Does anyone know where I can buy this incredible shirt?!

    • I bought a similar one a few years ago but can’t remember where. They were Phillies fan sites that were selling them. Just try googleing it.

  6. I was so disappointed in humanity when I heard about this.

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