I imagine it doesn’t take a whole lot to enrage Ozzie Guillen, and yet every time the manager of the Miami Marlins becomes visibly angry, it’s thought to be one of the funnier moments that the game of baseball can offer. During his team’s 4-0 loss to the Washington Nationals yesterday afternoon, Guillen was especially expressive in voicing outrage over Bryce Harper’s use of pine tar on his bat, or perhaps it’s more accurate to say that Guillen put on a display due to Harper’s reaction to the manager’s protest over his use of pine tar.

Here is what believed to have, in the parlance of our times, went down:

After Harper’s plate appearance in the first inning, Guillen spoke with home plate umpire Marty Foster about how high the pine tar on the rookie’s bat was. Presumably, Foster then had a talk with Harper or one of the other Nats players about it. So, in the fourth inning, Harper comes up to bat doing this:

Guillen took the pointing of the bat at the Marlins dugout to be an attempt to show him up, which in addition to obscenities caused this:

During the tirade, Harper continued to point the bat in the direction of the Marlins bench:

Further enraging Guillen to the point on gaskets being blown:

Eventually, Nationals manager Davey Johnson complained about the harassment, and the home plate umpire calmed things down.

After the game, Guillen neglected to explain what caused him to grow muscles and turn green:

What he did [today] was unprofessional. I’m not going to tell you guys what he did because I’m not going to be talking about it on ESPN, Baseball Tonight, what happened again. I’ll just leave it like that. I’ll talk to his manager in a little while.

According to Johnson:

Ozzie had complained that the pine tar was too high up on Harper’s bat. So we changed it. Then he was still chirping about. It got on the umpire’s nerves. It got on my nerves. He was trying to intimidate my player, I guess. That’s not going to bother our player. He does what he has to do.

For the record, here’s a picture of Harper’s bat in the first inning:

And here it is in the fourth inning:

According to a rather polite Harper:

He battles for his team, and that’s the type of manager Ozzie is. He’s a great manager to play for. He’s going to battle for you, no matter what. That’s a manager you want to play for.

According to MLB rules, pine tar can’t be spread above the label of the baseball bat. The idea is that the sticky substance on the bat creates additional friction with the ball producing more spin and forcing the ball to go further in the air than it would off of normal contact. Personally, I’m not certain that’s pine tar on Harper’s bat at all. It could merely be excess Natitude.

And The Rest

Cincinnati Reds prospect Billy Hamilton’s inside the park home run continues to absolutely astonish me. [Getting Blanked]

How does St. Louis Cardinals first baseman Allen Craig be so good? [Viva El Birdos]

The St. Paul Saints? More like the St. Paul Aints. No, really. For one night, anyway. [FOX Sports]

Things have gone a lot better for Texas Rangers starter Matt Harrison since he decided to give up losing. [Lone Star Ball]

New York Yankees General Manager Brian Cashman believes that Alex Rodriguez is still very much above average. [CBS Sports]

Check out The Kastaways, the world’s first all-mascot band. [Old Time Family Baseball]

The best two sport baseball players according to WAR. [Beyond The Boxscore]

In praise of Juan Pierre. [Crashburn Alley]

Unsolicited advice for Bobby Valentine: Just say no comment. [Comcast Sportsnet New England]

Ben Sheets is back, baby. [Capitol Avenue Club]

The Mount Rushmore of the Baltimore Orioles. [High Heat Stats]

Celebrity sighting: Mark Teixeira loses his bat as it flies into the stands, and it gets retrieved by Spike Lee. [MLB.com]

The Pittsburgh Pirates are so serious about acquiring Justin Upton, they’d consider giving up a young player, but not their best young players. [Twitter]