When I was twelve years old I switched schools. It was likely the worst possible time to do so. I was a gangly, awkward and painfully self-aware pre-adolescent foisted into the midst of an unknown territory that had pre-established social rules and hierarchies.
It was intimidating. The air about which the already formed cliques carried themselves led me to believe that they were better than me at everything I was good at. I tried to maintain a lone wolf status so that my deficiencies wouldn’t be revealed, but a meddling teacher forced me into trying out for the track team after seeing me run during recess.
It was in the first meeting of the track and field club that I realized they were actually all a bunch of idiots. The members of the club had assembled in a portable next to the main school building to give our basic information so that the teacher in charge could put us in our proper categories for training and future track meets. He asked everyone what grade they were in, and then went through each grade ensuring we were all of the proper age. One of the more popular kids was stumped by the question: “How old are you?”
After several beats of pause, he answered the teacher’s query with the following response:
Well, my mom says I’m eleven, but I’m pretty sure I’m twelve.
I was astounded, not only at the fact that this child didn’t know his own age, but that no one else in the room, other than the teacher, thought that it was completely idiotic not to know how old you are. I had a look of shock and almost concern on my face, when my eyes met the teacher’s and we exchanged a knowing glance that this kid was an absolute wacko.
I was reminded of this recently when Toronto Blue Jays manager John Farrell spoke about his third baseman Brett Lawrie, suggesting to reporters that the player’s oblique injury was the result of a tumble into the camera bay at Yankee Stadium.
Lawrie disagrees with this suggesting, believing the cause of the pain to be from something else, essentially telling reporters:
Well, my manager says it’s from the fall, but I think it just jumped out of nowhere.
Today, Brett Lawrie was placed on the 15-day Disabled List retroactive to Friday. It’s expected that Adeiny Hechavarria will continue to fill the hole at third base in his absence.