"What else do I have to do to let them know that me and my stupid hair are not coming back?

Oh, hey, another week of quotes. These baseball people just don’t know how to shut up, do they? Luckily, neither do I.

This week we have the Astros in denial, the McCarthys being awesome and a law I didn’t know existed.

We haven’t heard from Roger, so that’s still up in the air

I feel like Jim Crane and the Astros are kind of in denial over the whole Roger Clemens thing. He’s made it pretty clear he’s not pitching in the majors hasn’t he? I guess when you’re the Astros any press is good press. Except for all the coverage of them being terrible. That’s probably not so good.

A New York Mets fan who ran onto Citi Field following Johan Santana’s no-hitter has pleaded guilty to interfering with a professional sporting event.

This is definitely my new favourite law of all time (I have favourite laws? I guess I do now). I mean, I get it, but seeing it in print looks kind of ridiculous. That conversation probably wouldn’t go awesome for him in jail – “what are you in for?” “Oh, I found my wife in bed with my best friend so I killed both of them with a fire poker, what about you?” “I interfered with a sporting event because I wanted to be on the field when Johan Santana threw a no-hitter!” Punch, bleed.

It’s kind of hard to think about it now because you’re trying to win games, especially this time of year. But I’d be lying to you if I didn’t think it was special.

This is such a Derek Jeter-y thing to say. I may hate the Yankees with every fiber of my being but, Derek, your dumb cliches will always have a special place in my heart. I will never understand why.

People want to form too many equations. Just watch it. There’s no secret to how we’re doing it. We’re just doing it.

The best part of this quote from Adam Jones is that it’s from a Jon Paul Morosi article. I’m pretty sure comments like that are his kryptonite. “You mean there isn’t some bullshit underlying meaning to how you’re winning baseball games?” “No man, we’re just playing.” “But I need narrative to survive! Curse you, Adam Jones! You shall feel the wrath of Jon Paul Morosi!”

Love that not one person on the street is bothered by his head. Just a normal day in SF.

I know I’m not exactly saying anything radical here, but, the McCarthys are totally the best. Like most people, I’m thrilled by Brandon’s recovery and so, so impressed at both his and Amanda’s tweets through this whole thing (God, did I just praise tweeting in spite of a near tragedy? I hate the world). Best of luck to both of them. I am totally a McCarthyist.

Tonight was just one of those nights. I took my eye off the ball. When you take your eye off the ball, bad things happen.

This was Ryan Doumit‘s rationalization of why he committed three errors in one inning. A baseball player has never met an issue he couldn’t just cliche away, huh?

I did everything I needed to do. I felt good. It’s another step. They felt like my stuff was great. I just don’t know what the next step is – hopefully I’ll get back in the rotation. That’s what I want to do.

Urgh, I thought we were done with Andy Pettitte. I mean, good for him for coming back at his age and whatever but god dammit, I hate the Yankees so much. Why can’t they all just go away and play baseball somewhere horrible like they deserve. Like the American League Central.

For him coming up with some of the big hits with the Giants, I’m not the least bit surprised. He’s a terrific player. He’s a very heady player.

Even in defeat, Jim Tracy knows the truth – Madison Bumgarner is kind of totally the best.