Riley Breckenridge

rileybreckinridge

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A #DADLAP, butt-chin, mullet combo conveniently bundled up into a ridiculously catchy 80s pop song. How could you possibly resist? Something tells me that few did, and Huey spread “the news” and other things, before/during/after this video shoot. What a guy. And how great is that song?! #DADROCK

That said, after 38 years of existing on this planet, I have finally realized that Huey Lewis is fucking awesome … which means that I’ve almost completed my transition from rebellious eternally-teenaged band dude to becoming my dad. Pretty soon I’ll be delivering State of the Union addresses at the dinner table, citing W-L records in baseball conversations and wearing my pants pulled up to my tits.  #DADLAP

On a less depressing note …

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Your 2013 Los Angeles Dodgers.

The Week That Was

LAA – 2-5 (Baseball Prospectus Playoff Odds as of 8/13: 0.0%.)

That’s ZERO for those of you keeping score at home. For the rest of you, it’s also ZERO.

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I haven’t listened to this entire song in … maybe forever. And I’ve realized that the only part we ever hear during Los Angeles sporting events is the “best” part. And by “best”, I mean “least awful” part. I know this might fall on deaf ears, but I’m of the opinion that the song in its entirety is an absolute mess (and I won’t even comment on the video). Lounge-core intro? Check. Calypso interlude? Check. Prog/Space-rock bridge? CHEEEYECK. Ugh. It’s fucking awful.

Los Angeles in 2013 is traffic and traffic and more traffic and missed appointments/reservations and clearing your schedule to do ONE THING because of traffic and some more traffic and no parking and even more traffic. If you had the good fortune of being loaded (with money, coke and booze and limo drivers) in the 80s, I’m sure it was an full-blown party. Now, it sucks all of the balls.

Twice.

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Yup. You just got Bon Jovied.

(Has anyone every seen Jon Bon Jovi and Ellen DeGeneres in the same room? I didn’t think so.)

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puigslide

I’m back? What’d I miss? Anything? Anything at all?

In a way, the answer to that is “no”. The Angels are actually worse off than they were when I’d left them for dead back in mid-June. When I left for tour they were 11 games back, mostly impossible to watch, and now they’re 14 games back, entirely impossible to watch and wholly infuriating.

On the other hand, the answer is “Yes. Lots.” Apparently the Dodgers can’t lose now? Wonderful. They went 21-6 while I was on the road. 21-6! Apparently throwing money at things only works if you throw ALL OF THE MONEY at ALL OF THE THINGS (and if people get healthy and Hanley Ramirez rediscovers the cheat code that he had in 2009).

As it turns out, you can’t just throw ungodly amounts of cash at big-ticket Free Agents without addressing glaring needs in your team’s rotation and bullpen. Weird how that works, eh Arte Moreno?

Before we jump back into this mess, I must extend a massive thanks to my man Ian Miller for showing just how much of a hack I am by writing fantastic Battle Of The Bay columns in my absence. Not only did he keep you all thoroughly entertained, but he took the template I cobbled together over the first 13 weeks of the season and made it much better. The bar has been raised. I just hope I can reach it.

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battle of la smaller

A declaration of sorts.

“Let me get back to the middle … “

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battle of la smaller

Anthem of the week. Here we go.

The Week That Was

LAA – 4-2

“We’re in this together, guys. We can do anything as a t-”

Oh, fer cryin’ out loud.

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