Archive for the ‘I Watched This On Purpose’ Category

MLB: San Diego Padres at Colorado Rockies

Every Friday, the Getting Blanked crew makes a prop bet of sorts with one another having something to do with baseball games over the weekend. Of the four competitors, whoever wins the prop bet is able to dole out a punishment on the colleague of their choice – UNLESS ELVIS ANDRUS AND SOME DOPE’S WEDDING TOSS A MONKEYWRENCH IN THE WHOLE ARRANGEMENT. This week’s punishment was watching and recapping Tuesday night’s San Diego Padres and Colorado Rockies game in Denver. Because of #PropHate, I watched this game on purpose.

The Narrative

Webster’s defines “déjà vu” as…”a feeling that one has seen or heard something before”. Webster’s also defines “hacky lede” as “using the Webster’s defines device.” But last night’s Rockies/Padres matchup was déjà vu for Prop Hate/I Watched This On Purpose.

The most recent entry before this one also featured the Rockies and Padres. In fact, we were one day away from witnessing the very same pitching matchup two IWTOP in row (Jorge De La Rosa and Andrew Cashner start today’s Rockies/Padres tilt). You could accuse the Getting Blanked crew of East Coast bias or you could face facts: these two teams are awful.

This narrative (these two teams stink) is, well, it’s pretty much true. The Rox and Pods sit side by side in the NL West standings, comfortably below .500 and comfortably free of any lingering stakes or meaning in their respective seasons.

Despite similar lots in life, these two teams are striking in their contrast. The Rockies have one star (Troy Tulowitzki), two really good players (Dexter Fowler and Carlos Gonzalez, currently out injured) and a whole lot of God-fearing bros of various levels of replacement. As they are the Rockies, they have no pitching of which to speak. None. No, no, he doesn’t count. Nope, neither does he.

Take Colorado’s starter, Jeff Manship, for example. That’s it. Jeff Manship. That’s the joke.

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Colorado Rockies v San Diego Padres

Every Friday, the Getting Blanked crew makes a prop bet of sorts with one another having something to do with baseball games over the weekend. Of the four competitors, whoever wins the prop bet is able to dole out a punishment on the colleague of their choice. This week’s punishment was watching and recapping Wednesday night’s Colorado Rockies and San Diego Padres game. We call this #PropHate.

The Narrative

Three of the five teams that comprise the National League West division are notable. The defending champion San Francisco Giants are staggering through their schedule, losing to teams like the Mets while fielding a roster of Quad-A players filling in for injuries and watching their previously dominant starting rotation crumble before their eyes. The Los Angeles Dodgers have bought every free agent and acquired every regretful contract that ever existed over the last ten months, and they still struggled mightily in the early going before the promotion of Yasiel Puig and resurrection of Hanley Ramirez brought them back to life. The Arizona Diamondbacks lead the division, thanks to the holy triumvirate of above average pitching, great team defense and America’s First Baseman, Paul Goldschmidt.

Then there are the Colorado Rockies and the San Diego Padres.

Here are the best things you can say about these two teams:

Padres: Their stadium sure looks nice, and I hear that the climate in San Diego is wonderful.
Rockies: They haven’t lost as many games as I would’ve thought they’d have lost.

For the purposes of deciding postseason baseball and eventually a champion of the 2013 season, Colorado and San Diego might as well not play baseball against each other. It’s a meaningless tilt. But the system of baseball’s regular season schedule is built in such a manner that even the least important games of the summer, which will have no real bearing when things matter in September and October, must be played out.

… and so, last night, out it was played.

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Tampa Bay Rays v Houston Astros

Every Friday, the Getting Blanked crew makes a prop bet of sorts with one another having something to do with baseball games over the weekend. Of the four competitors, whoever wins the prop bet is able to dole out a punishment on the colleague of their choice. This week’s punishment was watching and recapping Wednesday night’s Tampa Bay Rays and Houston Astros game. We call this #PropHate.

The Narrative

We like to say that things have a way of evening out, and while there’s some truth to that statement, it’s a bit more complicated than putting faith in the due theory. Coming into Wednesday night’s game against the Tampa Bay Rays, the Houston Astros had lost five in a row, including back-to-back defeats at the hands of the Rays, who outscored the Astros 20-0 over the last two games.

Tampa Bay is a good team. Houston is a bad team. But the gap between good and bad in terms of Major League Baseball teams isn’t as wide as heroes and villains in summer blockbuster movies. Even the lowly Astros are unlikely to be consistently outscored by an average of ten runs a game by the mighty Rays.

And so, we get Wednesday night. A game in which Houston’s ace, Bud Norris, did what he’s done at home for the past two seasons. And a game in which Chris Carter did something that he hasn’t done at home since coming to the Astors. Good starting pitching and home run hitting combined to give Houston a 4-1 victory over Tampa Bay.

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Marlins vs. Twins

Every Friday, the Getting Blanked crew makes a prop bet of sorts with one another having something to do with baseball games over the weekend. Of the four competitors, whoever wins the prop bet is able to dole out a punishment on the colleague of their choice. This week’s punishment was watching and recapping Tuesday night’s Minnesota Twins and Miami Marlins game. We call this #PropHate.

The Narrative

The Miami Marlins are a juggernaut, and the only thing that will stand in their way is a general lack of talent, very little depth and the remainder of their regular season schedule – which on most nights will have them competing against superior competition. It would be arguable whether or not this was the case on Tuesday night when the Minnesota Twins visited Marlins Park for the very first time.

With a 4-2 victory over their guests, the Marlins have won four of their last five games in what has easily become their best run of the season. Miami achieved this despite a lackluster outing from their best pitcher, 20-year-old Jose Fernandez, who by my personal count had thrown 1,384 pitches by the second inning.

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Every Thursday, the Getting Blanked crew makes a prop bet of sorts with one another having something to do with baseball games over the weekend. Of the three competitors, whoever wins the prop bet is able to dole out a punishment on the colleague of their choice. This week’s punishment was watching and recapping Monday night’s Houston Astros and Chicago Cubs game. We call this #PropHate.

Do you see this image, lovingly twitpic’d and sent out into the world? This twitpic is what Prop Hate is all about. The above image was captured and uploaded, like countless other similar photos, during last night’s Giants/Diamondbacks game in San Francisco. The Giants are in first place and they also happen to be a team I enjoy watching on the television. Madison Bumgarner was their starting pitcher last night. He, too, is appointment television (in moderation, Parkes. Your ward is an adult now. If you love something, let him go.)

I did not see this double rainbow live during the early stages of Wednesday night’s Giants game. I wasn’t able to watch the Giants as I was too busy watching the Prop Hate punishment game, played between the s/a Red Sox and the mostly s/a Mariners. A game started by two pitchers with a combined Cistulli Nerd Score of Five (Bumgarner rates as 9, FYI.) The game itself earns a Nerd Score of 1, the lowest total of the night. At the risk of spoiling the rest of the game, it lives up to its billing.

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Every Thursday, the Getting Blanked crew makes a prop bet of sorts with one another having something to do with baseball games over the weekend. Of the three competitors, whoever wins the prop bet is able to dole out a punishment on the colleague of their choice. This week’s punishment was watching and recapping Tuesday night’s Chicago Cubs and Milwaukee Brewers game. We call this #PropHate.

The Narrative

I like to call Milwaukee Brewers starting pitcher Marco Estrada by the nickname Polo Erik. Think about it for a minute. Marco “Polo Erik” Estrada.

Last night, after previously leaving the game with the lead on four separate occasions this season, Polo Erik earned his first win of the season. But for as well as  Polo Erik pitched, and he pitched well (6 IP, 2 hits, 1 walk, 9 strike outs, 0 runs), last night’s game will likely more easily be remembered (if it’s remembered at all) for Chicago Cubs reliever Alberto Cabrera losing it.

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Every Thursday, the Getting Blanked crew makes a prop bet of sorts with one another having something to do with baseball games over the weekend. Of the three competitors, whoever wins the prop bet is able to dole out a punishment on the colleague of their choice. This week’s punishment was watching and recapping Monday night’s Houston Astros and Chicago Cubs game. We call this #PropHate.

The Narrative

As the season progresses, this weekly punishment stands to get increasingly horrendous. In the dog days of August, it’s difficult enough to watch your favourite team play a game rendered meaningless by the cruelty of the schedule, but for a neutral observer to watch a match between two teams that would be better off in the long-term losing the game being viewed than winning is so cruel of a punishment, American baseball blogs have been outlawed from enforcing it due to eighth amendment rights.

In some ways, this column is the water boarding of baseball blogging.

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