Look, it's damn near impossible to make a Seahawks/49ers game exciting nowadays, but cheesy cocktail lounge music isn't helping either.

We here at the Goal-Line Stand applaud creativity and innovation. If it weren’t for creative, out-of-the-box thinkers, we wouldn’t have many of the fine products and services we now enjoy daily. Like the telephone, toasters, and the Shake Weight.

But there are some ideas that should maybe stay in that box, and never, ever see the light of day. The esteemed minds at Fox Sports feel that a piece of well-timed music will enhance your football viewing experience. Last Sunday the 49ers/Seahawks game–a game largely seen by no one–was used as a guinea pig for Fox’s newest lab rat: inserting music into game broadcasts.

The idea is simple enough. Fox plans to jazz up the game with sporadic beats mixed into the broadcast. As you read that your mental ear probably heard one of the many soundtracks used by NFL films, soundtracks that could make the average grandmother stand up for the first time in eight years and run through a wall.

Instead, Fox gave us music that would send that same grandma into a long winter’s nap.

Music is an integral part of television and movie watching, and when placed properly it extenuates the emotion an audience should feel. But there’s nothing more cheesy and amateur than using music to convey an emotion that’s already blatantly obvious.

When a running back commits a costly fumble, we don’t need to hear some clich├ęd classical tune to know that yes, we are now permitted to feel the pain of said costly fumble.

The music played during the Seahawks/49ers game was a dry run, or–as Fox officially worded it–an unannounced test. Don’t worry though, because if you missed your date with the maestro last week, Fox is rolling out the rhythm again for Sunday’s Cardinals/Panthers game at 1 p.m. ET (it’s official this time!).

Eric Shanks, the president of Fox Sports, spoke with USA Today’s Michael Hiestand and didn’t rule out the possibility of using the network’s new music fetish during the Super Bowl. Shanks said timing is the key element, and unlike a movie or TV show, the directors and producers of an NFL broadcast don’t have the luxury of multiple views to tune the music perfectly.

“Just like music in movies, you have to use it at the right times. And imagine trying to score a movie the first time you’re seeing it.”

There is just one tiny ounce of hope amongst all the face palming that’ll be happening as this debuts officially Sunday. If Fox is successful and their music gimmick is a hit, then maybe the NFL Network will follow suit.

I’d much rather listen to pleasant violins and harps if they drone out Matt Millen’s bumbling.

Comments (2)

  1. we don’t need sad music playing while someone dies a slow death in a movie but we have it anyways its the exact same premise

  2. @ Average Person

    There are certainly similarities, but the key difference is that the directors and writers of movies and TV shows are creating works of fiction. Therefore, they have creative license to do whatever they wish in an attempt to evoke a certain emotion.

    Fox Sports is showing an event taking place in reality, and by throwing in cheesy music we’re being told how to reaction and feel about real-time events.

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