As he does every Wednesday, Tomlinson was perusing the latest edition of “In Touch” this morning. But this week, he could justify his smutty reading habits as an occupational commitment. See, the magazine was “reporting” that Kim Kardashian cheated on long-time boyfriend (and now fiancĂ©) Kris Humphries with Bret Lockett of the New England Patriots.

Now, I know what you’re thinking: “Who the hell is Bret Lockett?” Well, we were wondering the same thing. Research confirms that Lockett is indeed a member of the Pats. The 24-year-old safety was signed as an undrafted free agent in 2009. He has seven career tackles and one forced fumble.

Kim K is “incensed” and is threatening to sue the magazine and Lockett, according to TMZ.

Wait, why Lockett? Well, turns out he’s the dude letting the cat out of the bag, even if the cat doesn’t actually exist.

From NESN.com’s Jeff Phowe:

Lockett told Phowe that he and Kim “had a relationship,” adding that “everything else, you can pretty much read for yourself. It’s all over the internet.”

Kardashian’s people are telling TMZ that she’s never met Lockett, which is actually quite easy to believe. That said, it’s also hard to believe that a random football player would just make something like this up.

Then again, it’s not impossible to believe.

And as we continue to perform Google searches, it’s becoming easier and easier to believe.

Alright, we believe it.