So the San Francisco 49ers are looking to trade safety Taylor Mays. But they’ve taken a lazy interesting approach to finding suitors. Instead of working the phones and targeting specific general managers who might desire help in the secondary, the Niners apparently sent a mass e-mail to teams around the league advertising that Mays is up for grabs.

This is not a normal practice, and is just the latest example of how fantasy (football) is blurring with reality. We’re assuming the e-mail from general manager Trent Baalke read something like this:

Subject: Safety for sale


Looking to improve at QB, WR and maybe DE. Willing to part with Mays. Who needs a safety? Make me ur best offer. :)

And go eff yourself, Davis. You already got Huff for cheap and your offers are always ridiculously low.

Everyone else, lemme know!


It doesn’t end there. Exclusive to the Goal-Line Stand blog is this list of changes the 49ers’ organization wants the league to adopt:

  • The installation a trading block message board to make it easier for teams to communicate who is and isn’t for sale.
  • Teams should be able to vote for or against trades. If more than half of the league votes against a deal, it doesn’t go through.
  • The date and time of the draft must be negotiated on e-mail, and every team must agree on the final choice.
  • Teams should lose points for fumbles and interceptions.
  • Smack talk and team slogans.
  • The ability for teams to change nicknames annually to account for new trends in pop culture.

(Just in case it wasn’t blatantly clear, the above list was satirical.)