The Jedi cannot be angered or disturbed while speaking with the common man.

  • Josh Cribbs doesn’t enjoy rebuilding, or building in general, and he definitely doesn’t enjoy losing.
  • Raheem Morris isn’t an insurance salesman, he’s a football coach, and therefore he’s not worried about the long-term security of pesky little matters like his employment.
  • Bengals offensive coordinator Jay Gruden isn’t thinking about filling the head coaching vacancy in Jacksonville, and said he has a “million-to-one shot.”
  • Would you like to see the world come to an abrupt and terrifying end? Then you should buy a Tim Tebow shirt and hope the Broncos make the playoffs.
  • The Giants will have to keep chasing Dallas in the NFC East and forge ahead through their rough schedule without Osi Umenyiora, the defensive end who could be out for up to a month.
  • In far less surprising injury news, Jay Cutler spoke to the media yesterday for the first time since his thumb surgery, and he pretty much said exactly what we expected. He has a lot of time now to re-consider his latest marriage proposal.
  • Now that the Cutallari marriage is back on, the guys at Total Packers have a bit of a dilemma. Should they buy the apparently happy couple another gravy boat?
  • And in other significant but not exactly shocking injury news, the Eagles are still black and blue all over, and they’ll again be playing without Michael Vick, Jeremy Maclin, and Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie tonight.
  • Kerry Collins is quite happy in retirement, and he looks like he’s in a state of endless bliss while reclining in his Nashville backyard and picking away at his guitar.
  • We’re still waiting to hear when/if the man Collins replaced in Indianapolis earlier this year will ever be the same again.
  • Mark Sanchez hasn’t been his usual happy self around the Jets locker room lately, and even his parents are asking him if he’s OK.
  • Phin Phinatic thinks Brandon Fields has been the Dolphins’ MVP this year. Yes, he’s a punter.
  • Cowboys cheerleader Melissa Kellerman is back on Twitter. She says Team Jerry didn’t silence her, which means we can all sleep now.
  • USC quarterback Matt Barkley has submitted the required paperwork work to begin a draft evaluation, a standard process in which the NFL draft advisory board gives a draft eligible player a projection of where he can expect to be selected in next April’s draft. Barkley will likely be a high first-round pick, but he still says that he’s “50-50” between sticking around for one more year in college, and leaving to turn pro. USC is bowl eligible again next year after a two-year suspension due to the sanctions resulting from the Reggie Bush infractions.
  • Bill Belichick does not have time for your whimsical assumptions

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