Most athlete’s charitable foundations involve something relatively basic but invaluable to the community. Charities based on after school sports programs for underprivileged kids or free box seats for military veterans are pretty standard in the world of athletic philanthropy.

Ricky Williams is looking to change all of that. If Williams has his way, the next wave of America’s underprivileged youth will possess the super powers of one of the X-men or Superman, but definitely not Aquaman. That dude is a bitch.

Yesterday, Alex Dunlap of The Austin Chronicle reported that Farallon Capital, a California based hedge fund, pulled its $32 million investment out of The Ricky Williams Foundation after it was revealed the foundation was involved with the controversial group, Access Consciousness.

Access Consciousness seems to be a cult (or at least a cult-like organization). It aims to teach America’s youth several vital life skills like: how to heal wounds using the power of touch, how to read the minds of others for educational gain, and how to make terrible wines drinkable (this could change the boxed wine market forever!).

Dunlap sat down with Access Consciousness representatives Gary Douglas and Dr. Dain Heer as well as Williams, and the resulting interview was truly bizarre.  Here are a few quotes…

Douglas on teaching kids how to read minds and cheat on tests:

I teach them how to be aware of what they are aware of, and how to take answers out of other people’s heads when they take tests and stuff so they can all get A’s and B’s instead of C’s and D’s

Douglas and Heer on the power of healing:

She goes to the hospital the next day, to her surgeon that she knew personally, and the guy says, after looking at the X-rays, he goes, ‘My God! What happened? It looks like somebody already set this’” [dislocated shoulder and fractured ulna]

Douglas and Heer also suggested that they could use Williams’ connection with the NFL and NFLPA to use Access Consciousness’ methods of healing with injured and ailing players.

Williams has always seemed like a strange guy, but this is pushing towards bat-shit crazy. I’m all for a world where humans get fantastical superpowers like laser eyes, rocket feet, and the ability to tell the difference between butter and “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter”, but those things don’t come from charitable foundations. Those things come from gamma radiation or the occasional nuclear explosion.

You can listen to Dunlap’s interview here.