To be effective, Michael Vick needs to use his agility and athleticism to burn defenses. He’s a rare, uniquely mobile talent, so to truly be Michael Vick health is a paramount concern. And even now as an experienced veteran entering his 10th NFL season, there are still far too many moments when Vick doesn’t take the necessary steps to avoid contact when possible, and either throw the ball away or slide.

During his two seasons as the Eagles starter he’s missed seven games. His absence last year led to three Vince Young starts, and he did very little to convince anyone that he’s still an NFL quarterback, throwing seven interceptions. The Eagles lost two of those three games, losses that were particularly ugly (combined score of 69-34).

After a late-season turnaround during an uncharacteristically weak year for the NFC East, the Eagles fell one win short of the playoffs, and then watched as a team that made the playoffs by one win didn’t stop winning, and became the 2011 champs.

Vick was sacked a more moderate 23 times last year, but he was still knocked around consistently, and he’s had two +40 sack seasons. There’s a man who has some basic advice for Vick that was relayed by Nnamdi Asomugha after the cornerback spoke at an event in Oakland.

He’s the leader of the free world, and he wants Vick to slide.

Asomugha introduced Barack Obama at an event in Oakland earlier this week, and when the two spoke briefly afterwards the conversation naturally drifted to football. That’s when Obama delivered his presidential order.

“We talked about football for about three or four minutes,” Asomugha told the Philadelphia Inquirer. “And the one thing that stuck out was ‘Tell Vick to slide.’ He’s a big fan.”

Showing allegiance to the Eagles and their failed dream team is a poor, crippling move during an election year, but what’s more troubling is the ammunition Obama has now given Mitt Romney.

Since hardcore right wingers are creative enough to blame a tragic, senseless mass shooting on the theory of evolution, surely it’s only a matter of hours before an anti-sliding Romney campaign ad debuts. A growling and menacing Team Economy will be defending its barren wasteland territory, and with Team Amurrica driving for a touchdown quarterback Obama will sprint free into the open field. Instead of facing contact head on, the cowardly Obama ducks, tucks, and covers.

What? Too cheeseball? Healthy helpings of cheese are contractually required in all conservative ads depicting the world’s demise.