Athletes have never been above using their name, likeness and fame to shill a wide variety of products. Some of these products are pure garbage, and should rightly take their place next to other licensed crap — like ET for the Atari — in a landfill somewhere in New Mexico.
Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones isn’t an athlete, but he’s a natural when it comes to doing absolutely anything as long as someone hands him a bag of money at the end (one of the many reasons he continues to be incredibly rich).
Every time you watch that commercial, an angel loses its wings and a Hitler grows his moustache.
During last week’s Cowboys win over the New York Giants, NBC cameras spotted Jones’ son-in-law Shy Anderson cleaning Jerry’s glasses for him. At the time, it seemed innocuous enough, just a decent guy cleaning an older gentleman’s glasses. But according to Anderson, it’s time to cash in on that fleeting moment that almost made JJ seem human.
Anderson is going to create and market “Jerry Wipes”, which will be a line of eyeglass cloths that will be sold on the Cowboys’ website, inspired by that brief television moment.
“Jerry never talks to anybody during the game,” Shy said. “He is so focused. But he started asking, ‘Where’s Witten?’ I was looking over his should(er) and I could see his glasses were completely smudged. I said, ‘Seriously, Jerry? Let me see your glasses.’ I actually had an eyeglass cloth in my pocket.”
“It started out as a joke, but let’s see how far we can take it.”
Sometimes when things start out as a joke, they should probably stay a joke. Although maybe it’s this kind of thinking that has me living in the poor house, and I should totally start developing a chain of “why did the chicken cross the road?” theme restaurants.
Our specialty: beef.
Screen grab courtesy of FS Southwest