Michael Vick has avoided sacks with the use of his legs and the hand of the almighty. Still, through two games it seems like he finishes plays while staring deeply into a pretty blue sky far too often, and that’s not an ideal place for a quarterback whose bones are made of low grade bail twine.

Now with Jason Kelce’s season-long absence official, Vick could become an expert in cloud psychokinesis.

After delaying what seemed inevitable yesterday when the Eagles waited to make a decision on their starting center’s status following a serious knee injury Sunday, Kelce has now been placed on the IR, ending his season due to a torn MCL and a partially torn ACL. What does this mean for you, nail-devoring Vick owner? Bad, devil things.

Losing Kelce alone would have been troubling enough, but this is the Eagles we’re talking about, and nothing is ever done small. No, only dream team portions will suffice.

Kelce joins Jason Peters on the IR, Philly’s four-time All Pro offensive tackle who ruptured his Achilles during a training session way back in March. The loss of Peters alone is crippling after he allowed only three sacks last year while blocking during 570 pass plays.

Toss in Kelce now, and that’s a serious protection bubble in front of Vick that’s evaporated after only two weeks. We assume/hope/pray to higher powers that if you were willing to take the risk and use an early-round pick (most likely a second rounder, or third at the latest) on Vick that you also came back quickly and invested in a reliable, high-end backup.

Ben Roethlisberger in about the ninth round would have been ideal, and a few rounds later Matt Schaub provided even greater value. Beyond that, even Jay Cutler is a fine bench stash, because even though he looked like a pre-schooler flailing while trying to add a moat to his sand castle last Thursday night, he can typically give you far greater upside with his arm cannon and Brandon Marshall, and the ability for those two entities to connect with some degree of regularity.

So now just watch, hope, and rub magical, mythical dolls that will prevent Vick from hitting his thumb on a helmet again.