Captioning the Super Bowl

Post Game

Joe Flacco is the Super Bowl MVP

"See that guy over there? That's my brother. Yep, I'm clearly mom's favourite."

"You're next!" I just peed a little. In fear.

They found three pounds of confetti in his lungs.

Torrey is on the verge of having the greatest night of his life.

"For the first time in my life, I feel pretty"

Ray Lewis will now celebrate with a tall glass of deer antler spray

4th Quarter

Koch dances his way to victory, the Ravens win 34-31.

Juuuuuuuuuuuust out of reach. This was essentially the end of the ball game right there.

I've got nothing. This was just a great catch.

Now Kaepernick is "Kaepernicking". He scored on a 15-yard run to cut the lead to 3.

Well, that's just not very nice.

3rd Quarter

I guess we know what the love child of Carrot Top and the Hulk looks like. Apparently he's a 49ers fan.

This woman's hair is made out of birds (ravens?).

Frank Gore "Kaepernicked" after this 6-yard TD run. HOLY CRAP IT'S NOW A ONE SCORE GAME!

"Remember when there was only one set of footprints? That was when I was carrying you."

Michael Crabtree saunters in for a touchdown to cut the lead to 28-13.

There goes the power.

"So this is what it's like when doves cry"


Jacoby Jones returned the kick-off 109-yards for a touchdown. San Fran forgot there was football today.

Now kiss...

No one was ready for this level of Jelly


Second Quarter

Jacoby Jones celebrates with Anquan Boldin after Jones' 56-yard catch and run for a TD, the Ravens lead 21-6 at Halftime

Guess who?

C'mon baby, just let me get next to you.

"I AM ELITE!!!" Flacco throws a 1-yard TD to Dennis Pitta

Arthur Jones recovered a fumble by LaMichael James.

That Ball boy's moustache is fantastic. He looks like an old Civil War General.

First Quarter

David Akers nailed a 36-yard field goal. Ravens lead the 49ers 7-3 after the first quarter.

David Akers nailed a 36-yard field goal. Ravens lead the 49ers 7-3 after the first quarter.

Hey Anquan, did you see that guys balls? Yeah man, they were weird looking.

Aquan Boldin caught a 13-yarder to put the Ravens up by a touchdown

Vince Young immediately sprinted on the field and took the coin. Apparently he just really needed the money.

By the time Alicia was finished singing the national anthem, I read War and Peace twice, played seven games of Monopoly and did a third thing that was time consuming.

Even after years on the sidelines, Jimmy could still throw the kind of tight spiral that would make Tim Tebow violently weep in envy.



"If I'm the 49ers, I'm already sick of Ray Lewis"