After a busy little morning of analyzing the latest possible depression surrounding the Oakland Raiders, let’s break quickly for some levity. OK? Well it’s my blog, so yeah.

When Jake Long was a free agent and one of the most coveted offensive linemen on the open market, he was courted primarily by the Rams and Dolphins. His visit in St. Louis lasted about 90 hours, and it included at least eight physicals before he mercifully finally signed a four-year contract worth $34 million, $16 million of which is guaranteed.

How did the Rams close the deal? With this creepy custom painting of Long and his wife, of course: (via Turf Show Times)

jake long painting

Say, maybe this is taking that whole using the players’ wives during free agency thing a little far.

Disclaimer: this was actually the product of some fantastic creative work by the boys over at TST (April Fools? Yes, April Fools). But we still choose to believe it’s real. Jeff Fisher is menacing, even while overlooking wedded bliss.