Archive for the ‘Arian Foster’ Category

Arian Foster's goal-line efficiency is the new inefficiency.

Watching as your running back is repeatedly stuffed at the goal-line goes beyond a feeling of loss. You feel betrayed, cold, and alone.

It’s a special kind of failure even though it happens so often, because the inability to finish a drive that may have otherwise been successful for your RB leads to the kind of crazy which digs that ass dent in your couch several inches deeper. Trust me, I know.

An end zone drop by a wide receiver is the equivalent of a car wreak. It’s painful, and sometimes fatal, but it’s also sudden and over quickly. Your top running back can get stuffed multiple times, and sometimes even on back-to-back plays. It’s one of the most cruel punishments fantasy football has to offer.

Of course, you don’t draft a running back solely because of his goal-line ability. But it’s nice to know that the deal can be finished, and the red zone RB slayer can be defeated swiftly. So, who’s the best at such sword wielding tomfoolery? There’s a chart for that.

Rotoworld’s Chet Gresham was kind enough to look back through the first five weeks of the season thus far, and chart the success (or lack thereof) of running backs who have had a minimum of two rushing attempts inside the opponent’s five yard line. What he found is that the leading point scorer at the position could be much, much better.

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We begin the morning after the day of tears which are fed to us by the souls of broken football players with a curious, nonsensical thought out of Houston yesterday that could soon lead to more breakage.

Texans head coach Gary Kubiak seems to think that Arian Foster can easily handle the punishment of his current workload, which is setting him on a collision course with a 400-carry season. And you know, he’s probably right. He’s right in the same way that if I said I can walk across four lanes of traffic without dying, there’s a reasonable chance I would be successful in that endeavor. Also, this…

Yes, it’s also similar to saying that if a wild bear approaches your dwelling, all you need to defend yourself is an angry old woman. Works every time, all the time.

We’re sure Foster can handle any amount of carries Kubiak would like to give him, and there’s a good chance he’ll survive the season just fine, even though he has a bit of an injury history after missing three games last year. That doesn’t make giving a running back — any running back, but especially not an elite one with Foster’s value — the second most single-season carries in league history a good idea.

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Last August, Arian Foster was injured during training camp, and it was revealed that he’d likely miss the first week or two of the season. Since Foster is very active on Twitter, he immediately learned that for far too many, he’s just a number, and not a human.

That’s when he tweeted this:

“Those sincerely concerned, I’m doing OK & plan to B back by opening day. 4 those worried abt your fantasy team, u ppl are sick.”

Of course, the Internet took that quite well and filled Foster’s Twitter timeline with neanderthal vitriol, the highlight of which was someone who said that without fantasy football, Foster would be cleaning toilets. Because, you know, he only plays fantasy football, not real football.

When the backlash faded a bit, Foster then went on to explain that he loves fantasy football, and he’s even on his mom’s team, because of course his mother plays (quick aside: my mom is on both Facbook and Twitter, meaning she’s part of what I suspect is a rapidly growing segment of the motherly population that’s participating in social media, and she can tell me that dinner is ready digitally as I blog from her basement…what a world).

I mention all of this only because even if he didn’t intend to piss you off last summer, there’s a stark contrast between what Foster tweeted, and the very open and oddly apologetic embracing of fantasy football by Roddy White and DeAngelo Williams.

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The Texans make injured players wear half shirts during practice.

Yesterday, I told you not to worry about Arian Foster. Since I know you wait for my permission to feel any human emotion, you may now begin to become fearful about Arian Foster.

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