Archive for the ‘Billy Cundiff’ Category

Ray Rice immediately regretted his decision to have Taco Bell for lunch. His toilet was punished accordingly.

We are so close!

The NFL regular season starts next week, and I’m overwhelmed with feelings. Well, just two feelings: relief and fury.

I’m relieved that I can stop drowning in a sea of team previews, scouting reports and lurid tales of Detroit Lions operating motor vehicles while under the influence of turpentine (tough times in Detroit when a man can’t even afford a 40 of OE).

I’m infuriated that, although I did hours upon hours of pre-season NFL research, I still soiled the bed at my fantasy football draft. I auto-drafted without pre-ranking players, so I may as well have just never joined a league and instead lit a 20 dollar bill (the buy-in) on fire, so I could use it to ignite a fine Cuban cigar. At least that would have made me feel classy.

Maybe I’m just not meant to be a fantasy football champion. You know, me with a fantasy football team is a little like the mule with a spinning wheel…

Anyway, enjoy these “hilarious” picture captions. I’ll be over in the corner, lying in the fetal position, weeping openly (my only QB is Andy Dalton and I have a thousand WRs).

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