Archive for the ‘Stevie Johnson’ Category

Stevie Johnson is a funny guy. Remember that time when he dropped babies in a store that sold baby stuff and exclusively baby stuff? But it was funny because they weren’t real babies, so there was no need to freak the hell out because he’s a hazard to any human life he touches. Great times.

Since he’s a politician, a peacemaker, and a hero during the offseason, Johnson seeks to protect Buffalo. Wednesday night, North Korea declared that it has clearance to launch nuclear missiles at the United States. That’s some scary stuff, but Johnson knows how to keep Buffalo safe.


The above tweet is clumsily screen capped (thanks, NESN) because Johnson has since deleted his funny joke. Strangely, it seems Patriots fans and the fine residents of Foxboro didn’t take it with the grace and jovial spirit he expected.



Good news on the wide receiver front for the Buffalo Bills and New York Giants, as Stevie Johnson and Hakeem Nicks are both expected to play today.

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The quarter mark of the NFL season is a good check-point for fantasy owners. It’s a time to analyze your roster and cut bait with players who are dragging you down. Waiting until the mid-point of the season may cost you a playoff spot, so for those hanging around the middle of the pack or worse, it’s time to get aggressive and upgrade your roster.

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If the Bills win two straight games to start the season, there will be clowns in the Ralph Wilson Stadium parking lot, and maybe even talk of the “P” word. But first their offense needs to employ someone who’s capable of throwing a spiral with some degree of consistency, and ideally that someone won’t be named Tarvaris Jackson, god willing.

Step two is to have their primary receivers both stay healthy, and not drop easy game-winning touchdowns and then blame the almighty. That would be a really novel concept, yet they’re already failing at part one of step two.

Stevie Johnson was riding a stationary bike today at practice. That’s problematic because today wasn’t chill and ride your stationary bike day for the entire Bills team. No, while that sounds inviting, this was instead just your average regular-season Thursday, and thus a regular practice that Johnson wasn’t able to participate in due to his groin injury was taking place. While he still has one more practice left tomorrow to show that he’s reasonably healthy and ready to go for the Bills’ opener Sunday against the Jets, his inactivity today is a little alarming because yesterday he was able to practice, albeit on a limited basis.

That makes today a downgrade, and it makes you nervous if you’re a Johnson owner, although Chan Gailey did his part to calm those nerves by saying that he expects his wideout to practice tomorrow. Don’t worry, though, because if emergency measures are needed, here at 100 Yards and Running we have the power to make any wide receiver explode. We mean that in a production sense, and not literally. We’re not terrorists.

So just tell us who your other receivers are, and we’ll see what we can do.

If you’re not confident in our computerized fortune telling wizardry and you’re needing to plan for a possible last minute roster move if Johnson is out, then Jon Baldwin is a sort of OK pickup. He’s owned in just 23 percent of Yahoo leagues, and the Chiefs first-round pick in 2011 only appeared in 10 games last year following a preseason UFC match with the still undefeated Thomas Jones. He’s had more time to learn the Chiefs’ offense now after a full and normal offseason, but he has a difficult matchup this week against a strong Falcons secondary following the addition of Asante Samuel.

A more appealing pickup is Kendall Wright, the Titans rookie who’s starting this week and has a chance to quickly establish himself with Kenny Britt serving his one-game suspension. He’ll be matched up against a Patriots secondary that gave up 293.9 passing yards per game last year (31st).

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