When I picture an insurance salesman, usually it’s a scrawny beanpole-y fellow with unkempt hair, and a loose Daffy Duck tie. No, you just described yourself.
Kirk Cousins may fit that frame in another life (retirement?), but for now he’s in a whole different kind of insurance business. Namely, he’s handing out waiver wire quarterback insurance. What a nice man.
Watch your step in the creaky waiver wire rungs below as we roll onwards to championship weekend, or the opening of a championship matchup. There’s value in some spots, but in many others it looks like a waiver wire in Week 16. Barren, and lifeless.
Second round draft picks usually don’t have to wait until week 15 to make an impact in the pros. Unfortunately for LaMichael James, he did have to wait this long because of the fantastic depth ahead of him on the 49ers at running back. James will get his opportunity this week and if you don’t have space for him on your roster, he should at the very least be on your watch list.
UPDATE (1:07 p.m. ET): Bradshaw has now officially been ruled out, and some Giants beat reporters are also wondering if he’ll play another regular-season game. DAVID WILSON DAVID WILSON DAVID WILSON.
Hello there, David Wilson owner. I’m sure right now you’re beaming brightly while preparing to depart for a lengthy Friday lunch that may or may not contain more liquid than food. Good on you, fine sir.
Would you like more reasons to feel really, really great about yourself?
Need flex value? The waiver wire has an overflowing abundance of flexing fun. Need a viable, sure-fire, trusted option? Welp, see ya later.
Let’s play a drinking game, and take a shot every time you read the word “flex” in the many sentences below. If you make it through the entire post, you sir are a champion.
We’re skipping quarterbacks this week, though we’re only skipping them in the sense that our analysis of the QB wire can’t be read right now, at this very instant. Our excitement to find solutions for the Robert Griffin III owner should he miss time this week couldn’t be contained, so we took an extra long and extra deep and extra good look at the QB waiver options yesterday.
Ryan Grant’s return to Green Bay highlights this week’s edition of Fantasy Insomnia. We’re also keeping an eye on San Francisco’s first-round pick AJ Jenkins, who is getting his first crack to suit up in a meaningful game. Most waiver wires have become a barren wasteland, so make sure to put all these sleepers on your watch list:
Ryan Grant (GB / RB) – owned in 1% / 3% of ESPN / Yahoo leagues –Incumbent James Starks will miss multiple weeks with a knee injury, leading to Grant signing with the Packers this week, only a year after leaving them. Running backs coach Alex Van Pelt called Grant “a pounding back” which implies he is likely to see work in short-yardage situations or around the goal-line. Grant’s competition at running back, Alex Green, is not very effective between the tackles, which helps Ryan’s cause. Grant shouldn’t have a difficult transition period, since he last played for Green Bay in 2011.
There are so many average to mediocre to sort of OK running backs on the waiver wire this week that every league everywhere should have at least nine players claimed at the position. That may be only a slight exaggeration in many corners of fantasyland, a mystical place where suddenly DeAngelo Williams may actually matter.
So come with me on our weekly journey. Just like every week, consider the peer into the great beyond that is the waiver wire to be sort of like those first minutes when you walk into an apartment you may soon rent. Your first reaction is to smell, and check for obscure odors.