The real #1 best pic: can't explain why I love it so much.

I never understood why so many of my teammates chose not to wear their fake teeth. I mean, I get it during the game – having your teeth in doesn’t provide you with a benefit, so why risk a complication – but still: we’re headed out to a movie, buddy, are they that hard to put in? The no-tooth thing is part of the whole hockey player vibe though, I guess. If you’re going as a hockey player for Halloween, you’d inevitably black out a tooth.

Related: if you were going as a hockey player for Halloween, you’d try to look as much as like Zack Kassian as humanly possible.

Dude is off to a great start in Vancouver, with five goals and a number of fights already under his belt through eight games, which has earned him a promotion to the top line alongside the Sedins. It’s this great start that got my attention, and brought me to his Getty Images page.

And HOLY CRAP: Zack Kassian is (unintentionally?) hilarious. I don’t actually know a whole ton about the guy aside from the fact that he takes amazing pictures. I’ve selected the ten best after eight games for your viewing pleasure, and I intend to stay on this throughout the season. Let’s dive in.

#10

Don’t worry, the looks get more blank as we go.

#9

His grimaces are not subtle, as you’ll figure out.

#8

Big Giggles should really be his nickname.

#7

Pretty standard offensive position. I mean, it’s like Crawford just played the “cups” game with him and he can’t figure out which one the ball is currently under.

#6

“Put ‘er there, lil’ guy!”

#5

Remebering he has a dentist appointment tomorrow.

#4

Hot chick in the third row face.

#3

With his linemates.

#2

Grrr, defending linemates. “I don’t really like doing this but I’m really good at it so here, eat this fist.”

And finally, your reminder that Zack Kassian is a nice, normal looking guy who just happens to be very expressive and refuses to wear his fake front tooth. I’ll stay on this, I promise. Doing the Lord’s work here.

#1

Oh, and if you want more on Kassian the player, not the goofball, nice post by Jeff Angus on him here.

Comments (8)

  1. He really is bizarrely photogenic.

  2. Just a big, goofy kid. Love him.

    • And given what we know about him (Dad died when he was young) and his eagerness to learn (I’m too lazy to link to the interviews) it’s hard not to root for him. He has won me over.

  3. Is it true that the Canucks doctored Cody Hodgson’s photos when he was there to make him look better?

  4. Don’t like the way he leaves his feet and aims for the head when he (literally) throws a body check, but do have to say that these pics and the article dropped him down several notches on My List.

  5. I think this has become one of my favorite articles of all time.

  6. Kassian is a deer in the head lights. He belongs in the AHL and it’s another example of a completely ridiculous trade by a completely inept GM.
    Gillis should have been fired years ago. The Canucks are a mess. They don’t even look good ON PAPER.
    It’s going to be a very long year.

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