Okay, a couple things to note before listening to this song:
* It’s Danny Taylor, the Calgary Flames new goaltender, singing about the hilarious routine of getting sent down from the AHL to the ECHL, which I myself had the privilege of experiencing three times. HOWEVER - he did not write it. They aren’t his lyrics, he’s singing a song that was written by a guy he used to play with. So nobody from Wheeling should be mad at Taylor, and in reality, it’s more about having to go to a lower league than to a bad town.
* “Wheeling” is in West Virginia, and they have an ECHL team called the Nailers. Yes, the Wheeling Nailers. This is in the same league that once was home to the Macon Whoopee.
* This is from three or four years ago, and I just dug it up because Taylor’s name is in the conversation these days. I played with him for a few weeks in 2008-2009 in Reading’s training camp (when James Reimer was the other goalie, incidentally), and I can confirm that he is hilarious. My favourite lines in the song: “I can’t believe they found me in my hiding place” (when you’re worried about getting sent down, for some reason it feels like it won’t happen if you don’t run into the coaches), “Leave your sticks here” (sticks ain’t cheap, and minor league teams aren’t afraid to be stingy with them), and the coach’s “We both thought you were great!” (nobody ever tells you you played like dog meat, because they are massive liars). Oh, and I also like “I’d fight Bonvie,” but that might just be from someone who recognizes him as a minor league knuckle throwing assassin.
“Don’t lose any confidence in yourself!” Here’s “Death’s Better Than Wheeling.”
Look, I’m in agreement with you: “_____ing,” in regards to some damn pose an NFL quarterback made or makes frequently is a terrible, awful trend. First there was Tebowing, then there was Griffining, and now there’s “Kaepernicking,” which is to kiss your right bicep after scoring a touchdown, (and yes, Colin Kaepernick DID get the term trademarked, don’t worry). Us average folk apparently like to mimic these motions when we do well at average stuff, like successfully blending a smoothie, or whatever.
All that said, I do sort of appreciate Logan Couture throwing a little love the way of his fellow athletes in California by Kaepernicking after scoring against the Oilers last night. And hey, when you’re undefeated after seven games, you’re allowed to have a little fun.
Courtesy @brodiebrazilCSN (via @Score_Tomlinson), here you have it:
Okay, one and done, cool. Let’s just not make a habit of this.
(For more football fun, check out 100 Yards and Running)
Update: There’s video! Read the rest of this entry »
Photoshop from Swiss newspaper "Blick"
“Problems” is probably the wrong word. It sounds more like he had a solid case of Notgiveafuck, a condition single males in their late teens/early 20′s (and in many cases, beyond) are prone to coming down with.
Deadspin wrote a post this morning that highlighted some of the best (translated) comments in “Blick,” the Swiss newspaper who wrote about Seguin after his departure. Most specifically, they interviewed the cleaning company that tidied Seguin’s apartment after he moved out, and headed up their post with the above photoshop of Seguin in filth.
”The parquet floor was littered with coins worth 220 francs [$238],” Blick reported.
Coca-cola bottles, garbage and dirty linen lay scattered across the floor, while rotten bananas were left on a table, the newspaper said.
The bathroom was a shambles and the cleaning company spent a full day tidying the apartment.
In December, when Seguin returned to America, the staff were met with a similar stiff challenge.
Blick said the hockey player was “not versed in appliances” and as a result tried to wash his clothes in the dryer.
Haha, yesss, that’s my favourite part. Read the rest of this entry »
Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment is a company that owns the Toronto Maple Leafs, the Toronto Raptors, and and Toronto FC. As you’re likely aware, they basically print money.
They own the wildly popular/expensive “Real Sports” bar located just outside the Air Canada Center, and it’s a hotspot for hockey and wealthy people, which means it’s a perfect fit for NHL hockey players, who fit those requirements perfectly. It even has a lounge up top that Leafs players can enjoy without being hassled by fans. Hey, neato.
However, as the National Post pointed out yesterday, it appears as though Real Sports has been made off-limits by MLSE.
Deep cuts, brutha.
This is a bizarre, petty thing that should further the ill-will between the two sides, which should be good. If hockey is going to go down in flames, it might as well be a blaze.
Nah. You’re good.
Ilya Bryzgalov, as you all know, has a solid history of crazy quotes. 24/7 made him a “star” with his spiel on the universe (among other things), but really, he’s been eminently quotable since he’s been in the NHL.
Now, as a member of the KHL, he’s brought the crazy train out east.
He was recently removed from the roster of his Russian team before the Channel One Cup, the reason cited being injury, and not his .907 save percentage and numerous games spent riding pine.
Sports Express called Brygalov – the same paper that had previously made mention of Bryz’s love of space – to find out what the deal is. The exchange ended with Bryzgalov hanging up on them, but not until this exchange happened:
Why are not you on the team? You really have a health problem?
Sorry, but, unfortunately, I’m not ready to talk in detail with the press.
The thing is that now I am in the Mission Control Center, you wrote about in our last interview. Astronaut suit on me. And you will understand that it disturbs me to communicate.
Astronaut suit on him. Yep.
The Great Unknown might literally be the space between this guy’s ears.
Little Leafs' fan and Santa. (Image from the Toronto Sun)
I love this story. I mean, I shouldn’t, but give it a chance.
Shawn Jeffords had the story in the Toronto Sun:
Mary Trent says she was shocked by the behaviour of the Lowe’s Toronto Christmas Market Santa Claus as her son approached him. After Santa arrived a half hour late for his appearance, he proceeded to insult the boy’s red plaid coat.
“The first thing he tells my son is, ‘Oh, you look like Paul Bunyan,’ ” she said. “Really? Is that appropriate?
“Then he said, ‘Oh, you’re wearing a Toronto Maple Leafs tuque, you shouldn’t be wearing that, they suck.’ At that point, I took my son and told him we should go, Santa isn’t being very good today.”
Trent said her son was inconsolable and cried all the way home to Mississauga.
I mean, that’s a bad deal for the kid and all. I know, I know. It’s just too absurd to be true, like out of a Christmas movie. Or “Bad Santa,” if you don’t count it as one.
Trent’s post prompted an online apology Thursday from the organizers via Facebook. Mathew Rosenblatt, creator of the European-style event, confirmed to the Toronto Sun that Saint Nick had been fired.
“The person that had spoken those words is no longer at the Toronto Christmas Market and will not be there in the future,” Rosenblatt said.
The poor kid’s having a rough initiation to being a Leafs fan. So far in his lifetime they’ve finished 13th, 13th and been locked out, and he’s been told by Santa Claus that they suck.
Come on. Kinda funny.