The lockout has been a trying time for all of us. Fans are angry that there’s no NHL hockey to watch, players are angry that they’re kind of unemployed at the moment (except for the ones who are playing in Europe but they’re angry too, dammit), and journalists are angry because they have to invent things to write about (I invent things to write about all the time and am not a journalist so thanks for pointing that out, voice inside my head). However, in times of hardship and trouble like these hockey-less weeks, we turn to our elders. We turn to those who have always shown us that they are the best of the best of the best at what they do. Like the Men in Black. We turn to the progenitor of the pointless, the regent of the ridiculousness, Mr. Damien Cox.
Archive for the ‘This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things’ Category
Posted by Jake Goldsbie under This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things on Nov 16, 2012
Posted by Justin Bourne under General Amusement, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things on Aug 30, 2012
One of my favourite things to do in the world, to this day, is to handle a hard orange hockey ball with a light stick with a huge curve on a smooth surface, and fire it a road hockey net. If there’s a goalie in net, I could do that for hours. I’m turning 30 in December, and I could literally do that from now until bedtime tonight if I could find a willing goalie. Especially if there’s a “Now” CD in the boombox, or even better “Jock Jams.”
The problem with the obsession that I had as a kid was that it cost my parents thousands upon thousands in property damage (quite literally). I just couldn’t help myself.
The off-season for ice hockey means one thing: road hockey season. It seems like a fitting time to write my parents an apology.