NBA players have been known to make some outlandish purchases with their exorbitant sums of money. Gilbert Arenas has a fish tank that he can sit in. Marquis Daniels commissioned a necklace that’s a 3-D version of his head. Travis Outlaw owns pitbull kennels. These are just three examples of things that have really happened in this crazy league we love.

But, as is usually the case, Shaquille O’Neal takes the cake. Or rather, he’s trying to take it, but no one will give him any cake. And, as we all know, he hates not getting cake. From UnionLeader.com:

Einstein, the pint-sized pinto and world’s smallest horse, isn’t for sale.

Not even Paris Hilton or Shaquille O’Neal — who’ve expressed interest in acquiring the New Hampshire-bred miniature horse — could write a large enough check for Einstein, owner Charlie Cantrell said.

“Shaq would have to arm-wrestle Paris Hilton for him,” said Cantrell, jokingly, from his home in Gilmanton. “We’ve been contacted by so many people, but he’s not for sale. He’s priceless.”

Was there ever a time in your life that you would have even considered that a future Hall of Fame basketball player would be competing with a tabloid queen over purchasing the world’s smallest horse when it isn’t even for sale? Is that something that anyone could have even conjured with the help of very strong hallucinogenic drugs? I don’t think so. But it really, really happened. Shaq really wants a tiny horse.

Though he won’t be able to get his hands on this specific miniature equine, Shaq might be lucky enough to get his own little horsey.

Cantrell said he would be happy to introduce O’Neal to a top breeder of miniature horses. The Celtics newcomer and his family recently settled into a sprawling property in suburban Sudbury, Mass., a good spot for a rambling 1-foot-8 steed.

“Have Shaq get a hold of us. We’ll see if we can find him a suitable replacement. We’ll get him hooked up with a beauty,” Cantrell said.

All’s well that ends well, as the saying goes. Even better when it ends with an tiny horse in the hands of giant.

(via Best Week Ever)