Toronto Raptors 102, Boston Celtics 101
If you’re ever wondering how important Rajon Rondo is to the Boston Celtics, just remember that one time Boston lost to the Raptors on two free throws by Amir Johnson. It’s not that the Raptors and Amir Johnson aren’t good, it’s just that they are the Raptors and Amir Johnson. You get the drift.

New Orleans Hornets 75, Sacramento Kings 71
I assume this is just a third quarter score and that the Hornets and Kings plan on playing the rest of their game sometime today. I mean, 146 combined points is pretty bad, so they must have postponed the fourth due to an ostrich attack or something like that. There’s really no other explanation.

Detroit Pistons 115, Washington Wizards 110 OT
The Wizards are now 1-3 when JaVale McGee grabs 10 or more rebounds and 3-5 when he doesn’t. Obviously he needs to stop rebounding because it’s clearly not helping. More mistimed jumps, please.

Los Angeles Lakers 117, Golden State Warriors 89
Pau Gasol had an OK game, I guess. In 30 minutes, he scored 28 points and didn’t miss a single shot (10-10 from the field, 8-8 on free throws) while also grabbing nine boards and blocking four shots. Only five assists though, because he’s such a slacker.