Blake Griffin has spent the majority of his 47 game NBA career dunking on fools. Through those 47 games, Blake has 108 dunks, good for second in the league behind Dwight Howard. That works out to a little more than two dunks a game — stats, guys — and, in general, at least one of those two has been on somebody. The dude has a aptitude for posterization.
He’s so good at it, in fact, that someone could write an entire story about those guys who Blake has dunked on. And, in fact, someone has, as Sports Illustrated has just published what amounts to an oral history of Blake Griffin’s dunks. It’s penned by Chris Ballard — author of the outstanding “The Art of a Beautiful Game” — and it’s awesome. Read it now, or Instapaper it for later because it’s so, so good.
What makes the story, obviously, are the quotes of the victims (college sucker Zach Novak is particularly amusing). However, the best quote in the entire story comes from, surprisingly, a non-victim. Not surprisingly, on the other hand, is that the quote comes from Ron Artest.
In fact, at the current rate, there may soon be as many players in the league bearing white-chalk outlines courtesy of Griffin as not. Some, like Ron Artest, are even looking forward to it. “I’m not going to lie,” Artest told The New York Times. “I hope he dunks on me, puts his shoulders on my face and, like, ‘Aaaaah!’”
Of course Ron Artest thinks it would be thrilling to be dunked on by Blake Griffin. Why wouldn’t he? That is a perfectly Ron Artest thing to say and do.
So, yes, read Ballard’s article. It’s kind of amazing to see NBA players totally in awe of another player, especially one that made them look silly. Let’s just hope for an update of this 10 years from now, even though that article will be “Infinite Jest” long.