This week in fantasy basketball is a short one. Or as I like to call it, Snooki Week. It’s that time of year on the fantasy basketball calendar that will either make you happy or angry, as it’s all about getting it in at the early part of the week because there’s no catching up towards the end. Thank you, All-Star break.

In any case, you can see the number of games each team has at the end of this “sexier than Brooklyn Decker” column. OK, maybe it’s not quite as sexy. At all. But can Brooklyn suggest better waiver wire free agents than me? Like it matters. Below are six suggestions for deep leaguers because, next week, I pick the 2010-11 Fantasy Basketball All-Stars! This week you have to read about the bottom-feeders.

Deep League Pick-Ups

Christian Eyenga, PG/SG/SF, Cleveland Cavaliers (8% owned in Yahoo! leagues)
Fact — Eyenga has been consistently starting for the Cavaliers since January 22, which is the equivalent of knowing the molecular density of a Twinkie. Only a select few know this (Cavs fans and hardcore basketball fans about Eyenga, fat scientists about the Twinkie). In the month of February (five games), Eyenga is averaging 11.4 points, 3.8 rebounds, 2.0 assists, 0.8 three-pointers, 1.4 steals and 1.4 blocks. He’s been a stat-stuffer for the horrendous Cavaliers and can be the cream in your fantasy basketball team’s Twinkie. Hmm … that didn’t sound right. In any case, the Cavs don’t have anything to play for, so Eyenga, who is already listed as the starting small forward on the depth chart, will get tons of burn.

Anthony Parker, SG/SF, Cleveland Cavaliers (7% owned in Yahoo! leagues)
Here’s another Cavalier that could help your fantasy squad, even if he can’t help his own real world squad. Parker is averaging 10.8 points, 2.8 dimes and a couple of rips and triples each in the past week (four games). After starting for the team for most of the season, Parker was coming off the bench until just recently when he got his starting job back. He’ll put up strings of scoring games, both negatively and positively, but he’s pretty consistent, like Jason Statham movies, when it comes to steals and treys. Parker basically does good things, but there always seem to be something missing. Maybe the Cavs should hire Guy Ritchie as an assistant coach. It’s not like it’d matter anyway.

Timofey Mozgov, C, New York Knicks (7% owned in Yahoo! leagues)
Before the season, many Knicks fans were calling Mozgov, “MozGOD!” Of course, Mozgov’s deity status was a bit premature and I doubt he’ll ever wield a magic hammer, a trident that controls the seas, or get chicks like Walt Frazier during the 1970s. However, he does flash some potential, however inconsistently. In the past week (three games), Mozgov averaged 10.0 points on 75.0 percent shooting from the field, 7.0 rebounds and a couple of swats. In a deep league, he’s someone to consider, but it’s hard not to remember that Mike D’Antoni likes to play small ball and that Blake Griffin totally destroyed Mozgov’s NBA manhood, forget godhood. Then again, Griffin does that to people.

Sasha Vujacic, SG, New Jersey Nets (6% owned in Yahoo! leagues)
As a writer for Nets Are Scorching (PLUG!) and being a Nets fan (shut your mouths), I wasn’t exactly enthusiastic about Vujacic’s arrival to Jersey. In fact, I thought the best thing about him being with the Nets was the potential for Maria Sharapova courtside sightings. But, just like when I recently conceded that the Earth is round, I’m man enough to admit when I’m wrong. The Machine has been a great shot in the arm for the Nets and in the past week (three games), he’s dropped 13.7 points, grabbed 4.7 boards, dropped 2.3 dimes and hit 2.7 treys from Kerby Land. When Vujacic comes off the bench, he does damage (usually to the other team) and I can appreciate that. He still needs a haircut though.

Austin Daye, SG/SF/PF, Detroit Pistons (6% owned in Yahoo! leagues)
The first thing that hits you about Daye is his need to participate in the time-honored tradition of buffets. Second is his physical tools and basketball skills, which haven’t yet blossomed in Motown. However, he’s only in his second season and we all know the talent is there and it’s just a matter of time before he’s a consistent performer. In the past week (four games), Daye averaged 8.0 points, 4.8 rebounds, 1.3 threes and one block. They’re not mind-blowing stats, but you’re in a deep league if you consider Daye, so get over it. Besides, the Pistons have been increasing his minutes (a career-high 26.1 minutes per so far this month) and the upside is there. Now, let’s go eat a goddamn snack!

Willie Green SG, New Orleans Hornets (1% owned in Yahoo! leagues)
Marco Belinelli recently lost his starting gig with the Hornets and Green took his place, not Marcus Thornton (see below). While Green never made fantasy basketball owners say “daaaaamn,” during his days with the Philadelphia 76ers, the boy can score and that’s all you can expect. In his last game that he first took over for Belinelli, Green scored 19 points on 8-for-14 shooting from the hardwood, including hitting two three-pointers. Oh, and one rebound, no assists, steals or blocks. See, told you he just scores. However, what makes Green interesting is that he plays alongside Chris Paul, the assists magician. So, expect Green’s ability to put up points to be augmented, sort of like when the Power Rangers would get into their respective vehicles and became Megazords.

True Or False

Brandon Roy is coming back soon and he’s still on the waiver wire. Instant pick-up!
FALSE. Roy had surgery on both knees just a few weeks ago and knees are kind of a big deal when playing basketball. He, as well as Marcus Camby, practiced with the Blazers recently for a half-hour and was reportedly pain-free. Still, it’s suspect. Injuries always are and when you consider that Roy was only producing 16.6 points while shooting 39.9 percent from the deck, 3.0 rebounds and 3.3 assists (all career-worsts), an eyebrow must be raised and a chin must be rubbed. However, if you’re languishing in the latter half of your league or have a spot on your roster to keep Roy on the bench, then you may as well pick him up for the possibility that the surgeons put adamantium knees in Roy, Wolverine-style.

What I Did This Week

I picked up Roy, because you never know. SNIKT!

Fantasy Thoughts To Jump Off From

- Guess who’s feeling frisky and getting filthy with it in February? Baron Davis. In five games thus far in the Snookiest month of the year, B-Diddy is averaging 17.4 points, 9.2 dimes, 4.2 boards, 2.0 triples and 2.8 rock rips. It’s good being healthy, huh? The only downside is that the Clippers are 1-4 in February. But this is fantasy basketball, so it matters as much as that seventh shot of tequila.

- It was about this time last year that I picked up Marcus Thornton from the waiver wire. He had just averaged 12.2 points and 1.5 three-pointers in January and was doing big things. He went on to do bigger things as he averaged 20.3 points and 2.0 Kerbys in 29 games after the All-Star break. But this season? After Marco Belinelli was demoted from the starting unit you would think Thornton would get the call, but he didn’t. Willie Green did instead. All I have to say about that is, damn, what happened?

- Living in the NYC area affords me a lot of cool opportunities and this past week, one of my fantasies was fulfilled as I got to meet and actually talk with Kevin Smith. I can’t think of a better fantasy thought to jump off from than that. Well, maybe Brooklyn Decker. Anyway, SNOOCHIE BOOCHIES!

Number of Team Games in Week 17


Follow Dennis on Twitter because he hooked you up with two Brooklyn Decker pic links. BONG!