As we all know, Kevin Garnett is constantly trying to fight all of his opponents on the basketball court at the same time. Or, at least, he’s trying to convince those opponents that he wants to fight them, which in turn will make them want to fight him, which in turn will make them less focused on playing basketball. Basically, Garnett’s doing what he can to make the other team uncomfortable at all times. If that involves seeming like he’s on the verge of punchasizing some faces, then so be it.
Last night in Utah was no different as Garnett and Jazz big man Al Jefferson had a disagreement with regards to where Garnett should be putting his face. KG thought his face belonged on Jefferson’s ear, Jefferson disagreed. Pushing happened. Tempers flared. Bingo bango, double technical. Fire snuffed. All’s well.
Well, not really. Here’s Jefferson postgame, from the Boston Globe:
“I don’t even want to talk about him, to be honest,’’ Jefferson. “I was just out there playing my game.’’
But he then added that he felt disrespected.
“It’s a lot of things I can tolerate. I’ve been in this league long enough to know that he’s going to talk. He likes to hear himself talk. But he’s not going to touch me on a point like, ‘I’m going to punk you.’ You’re not going to do that to me. I’m a cool cat, and I don’t bother nobody. But he’s not going to touch me, and that’s just the bottom line.’’
“Honestly, Kevin don’t bother me as far as his talking,’’ Jefferson said. “Everybody can go off and talk and yap at the mouth, but I’m not going to tolerate no one touching on me and pushing me. He just pushed me like I’m a coward, and I’m not a coward. Never have been.”
Just to review, Al Jefferson is a cool cat but is not a coward. Remember that, just in case anyone ever asks you which one he is. The answer is cool cat. Always has been, always will be.
And that’s the funny thing. You know Kevin Garnett is annoying when a self-professed cool cat — obviously one of the best kinds of cats that a human can be — gets unnerved by his antics. (Antics, mind you, that started with Garnett pulling the chair on Jefferson in the post, a maneuver that is equal parts savvy and dastardly.) If cool cats are getting their whiskers twisted, then you know the chihuahua has done his job. Animal zings.
But really, this is Kevin Garnett’s game — being the most annoying person on Earth for 48 minutes a night while simultaneously making it seem like he wants to cave your skull in with his fist even though he wouldn’t bust a grape in a fruit fight. You have to wonder how the same old shtick has been so effective all these years. You’d think that eventually the opposing players in the league would just wise up and ignore him, for their own benefit.
Then again, cats and dogs living together peacefully would be mass hysteria. Trust me, you don’t want to cross Mother Nature. She’s a fickle mistress.