LeBron James caused quite the stir-fry with his “finishing our breakfast” quote yesterday when talking about the Heat closing out their series with the 76ers. Though it was really just a co-opting of Jay-Z’s “Public Service Announcement,” people got salty. Spencer Hawes questioned the accuracy of such an analogy, while Louis Williams started giving out breakfast nicknames to all of his teammates. All in all, pretty great responses to a pretty good quote. Well done, everyone.

But that wasn’t the end. No way. Since the Heat beat the Sixers, that meant it was time for a second helping of delicious food metaphors. LeBron was the first to step up to the dinner plate. From Brian Windhorst:

“Now we’re preparing for lunch, I guess.”

OK, sure. Pretty much had to say that.

But taken to the extreme, LeBron might be embarrassed that he didn’t plan this out like a fancy dinner party. Because if the Sixers were breakfast and the Celtics are lunch, that makes the Eastern Conference finals supper, which in turn makes the NBA Finals Taco Bell’s Fourth Meal and no one wants that. So based on this off-hand comment, I think it’s safe to say LeBron doesn’t care about getting an NBA championship because he basically thinks it’s terrible Mexican food. Case closed.

However, LeBron wasn’t the only one enjoying the taste of a finely-crafted culinary comparison. Here’s Elton Brand, using food as a way to explain how the 76ers played hard in Game 5. From the Philadelphia Daily News:

“Hey, it was a long buffet,” said Elton Brand, who also scored 22. “We fought them all the way.”

Yep, Elton Brand, you guys are the continental breakfast of the NBA. Dry pastries, pans full of hours-old bacon and a surprisingly robust selection of oatmeal mix-ins — the Philadelphia 76ers are all of that. (Andre Iguodala is the omelette counter because he’s the Sixers’ best player.) As far as I’m concerned, that’s a huge compliment. They may not have won their series, but leaving the postseason as the NBA’s answer to the best meal of the day is nothing to sneeze at.

Even more hilarious, however, was that the elaborate food puns were so contagious that the Associated Press’ Tim Reynolds couldn’t help getting in on the action.

Maybe it was no coincidence that James was nearly held to another breakfast food—a bagel, otherwise known as 0 points—in the first half. He had only three points at intermission, matching his playoff career low, and the stage was set for another down-to-the-wire night.

Nor could the Philadelphia Daily News’ Marcus Hayes:

For a group of guys sitting down to breakfast, the Heat didn’t play hungry. But they managed to choke down the win. [...]

Breakfast was poached Sixers.

But was it the breakfast of champions?

Nor could the South Florida Sun-Sentinel’s Mike Berardino:

Breakfast was a little too chewy.

Lunch comes next.

It’s times like these that we need Fire Joe Morgan. And also some waffles. See you guys at IHOP.

Comments (12)

  1. “See you guys at IHOP.”

    Famous, pre-arrest words.

  2. With all this talk about food, I can’t believe the Heat didn’t sign Eddy Curry.

  3. What the hell is supper? Is that what they eat in Lombard? :-)

    The rest of us in Will County have “dinner” Trey…, “dinner”….. LOL

    The finals would be desert…, something you shouldn’t have (something they should not even be able to achieve) but do.

  4. I’m hungry now.

  5. And now Reggie Evans wants in on the action (via twitter): ”

    About to go ham at the WAFFLE HOUSE.”

  6. Lets see who is going to eat who for lunch ……

  7. Lebron is a douchebag.

  8. SFII — I just got tired of typing dinner.

  9. Trey, why all the Taco Bell hate? Really?

  10. Stop getting mad at LeBron. Dude has a right to say what he feels. Now he’s a douchebag because the “media” is making a large deal about his comment. Nice…

  11. So we can definitely call this Sixers line “The Breakfast Club” next season, right?

  12. Lebron is just doing what most pro athletes do, talk trash.

    It’s at times like this when athletes LOVE the media because it works in their favor, it’s the “All eyes on me” they love so much.

    But what annoys me is when they turn on the media as soon as a story doesn’t suit their needs.

    With “The Decision”, “The Concert” and now “The Comment”, all this will be shoved back in his face if he doesn’t win a title this year, period.

    A chance I guess he is willing to take.

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