You might think Dwyane Wade and LeBron James are the jerkiest jerks to ever grace a basketball court. But their teammates don’t, for one simple reason — presents. From the South Florida Sun-Sentinel:

The gifts come without warning or explanation.

They might be small and inexpensive or large and valuable.

No occasion is needed to spur these moments of disarming generosity.

Nor do they come with the expectation of public thanks or reciprocation.

This, it seems, is just part of being a teammate of LeBron James and Dwyane Wade.

“Those two,” says Heat backup forward James Jones, “are special.”

Might be an iPod or a pair of headphones.

Might be a box of sneakers or a flashy warmup suit.

“Things that guys like us use,” Jones says on the eve of the NBA Finals.

“Special gifts,” says Juwan Howard, the Heat’s oldest player.

OK, it is very nice that these two guys, the unquestioned leaders of their team, are generous towards their less talented teammates. I am sure that that sort of thing helps to create a bond betwixt the superstars and the grunts. Very nice of them. But is there anything funnier than Juwan Howard describing these presents as “special gifts?” Probably not.

Unless it’s this.

There have been times this season when the Heat has traveled north and one of the younger players has failed to pack appropriately. Soon, a package will appear in that player’s locker with a scarf and a beanie.

These guys, always with the fashion. Forgot your beanie? LeBron’s got your back. Need a scarf? D-Wade will hook you up. Special gifts, you guys. They’re what make the world go ’round.

However, you have to wonder how Wade and LeBron handle Chris Bosh in this sort of situation. Do they get him gifts, thereby demarcating him as one of the lesser Heat? Or do they not give him anything, leaving him out of the fun? Does Bosh give the other Heat gifts, keeping up the Big Three ruse? Either way, it seems a little awkward and I am worried that Chris Bosh’s ample neck will get cold if he forgets to pack a scarf during a trip to Minnesota.